Normal is Overrated.

Is it time to finally listen to the Sages of Old?

2012-02-03T08:29:00.003-07:00

In the time of the beginning of the Modern Era, The Great Sage, Rabbi Hillel said “If I am not for myself, who will be for me? If I am not for others, what am I? And if not now, when? Rabbi Akiva said "Love your neighbor as you love yourself"; and Rabbi Abraham Joshua Heschel, in the 20th Century said " "All it takes is one person… and another… and another… and another… to start a movement".

We ask, what is this movement? Could it be that the movement should be to care for others as we do ourselves?

In Deuteronomy 6:5-9 and again in Deuteronomy 11:13-21, we are commanded by G-d to love Him with all of our heart, might and soul. This was commanded on all of mankind.

Do these rules not still apply? Do the words of Hillel and Akiva from 2100 years ago not still apply?? How about the words of Heschel, spoken just a few decades ago??? How about if I throw in, just for good measure, the words of The Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King who was quoted as saying "Life's most persistent and urgent question is, 'What are you doing for others'?"

According to the Sages above, should we not Love G-d with all our hearts, souls and might? Should we not love each other as we do ourselves? Should we not take it upon ourselves do protect our own (human race)? And finally, should we not do for others???

One thing I can say with veritable certainty is that if WE were the "Others", we would absolutely hope and pray that mankind would help US.

The problem today, friends, is that we don't. We are too concerned with our own luxury car payments and huge mortgages; with paying our credit card bills that we ran up buying things that we could not afford; and most of all, we are too concerned with "others". Not with helping them, but with "equalling them". Keeping up with the Jones's, or the Berkowitz's, or the Al-Masri's.

In about two months, we will remember the Passover; the Exodus from Egypt when we were liberated from Pharaoh's slavery. We sit around our Seder tables and sing "Dayyenu", it was enough to be liberated; it was enough to receive Torah; Dayyenu, it was enough. But was it?

Are we not still slaves? Are we not slaves to our jobs; our large mortgages, our BMW payments?

What if we were to do an experiment, just for this weekend: From the beginning of Shabbat, at sundown this evening, let us think not about ourselves, but about others. Whether we are on our way to Synagogue, or the golf course; the mall or ball field; the Superbowl party or Bat Mitzvah, let's take a split second to smile at an entirely random fellow person. Let's take a brief moment to think about what THEIR life might be about; what problems might THEY have; and just maybe, we will be able to see the meaning in the words of our Sages from long and not do long ago.

From the sunny Left Coast, I wish you Ahava u'Vrachot, Love and Blessings.

Shabbat Shalom.

--Rabbi Alan Abrams

The First Fifty - A chronicle of hope and gratitude

2011-11-10T09:49:00.003-07:00

It is said that the first of anything is the hardest to attain. The first million; the first big league home run; first NHL goal, and so forth...

What about the first fifty? As in fifty years??

Four thousand years ago, some of our ancestors lived to be 900 years old. Moses, as we know lived to see 120; others even longer. 200 years ago, attaining the age of fifty was at times difficult, and even today, in some cultures, ravaged by poverty and famine, even the age of twenty seems to prove at best, a dream.

For us, though, living in our technologically incredible world, fifty is considered young. Most of the people with whom I work are well into their eighties or nineties, and some have even surpassed the Century mark of 100 years of age. Medical technology has made it so.

For me, attaining the age of fifty this coming Sunday wasn't so easy, and it was my fault. Years of abusing my body caused a sudden interruption in the life continuum four years ago, and to all concerned, reaching 50 for me was, but a dream. In fact, reaching forty-six was in short, a miracle. Nevertheless, I did make it this far, and for being here, I say Shecheyanu, the Hebrew prayer of gratitude for arriving at this place, at this time.

Often, I ask the elderly with whom I work to tell me what they feel to be the greatest change that they have witnessed in their ninety or so years of life. Their reply, almost to a person has nothing to do with technology, transportation or media, as we would expect. Their answer is stated simply and quietly with one word: Respect. "People no longer have respect", they tell me and continue to relate that this lack of respect appears to them as a general concept. People no longer respect people; we no longer respect the rules of society; we no longer respect our cities or communities; we no longer respect our own accomplishments, such as our jobs; and we no longer respect ourselves.

Teenage boys wear pants that are three sizes too big and have no desire to cover their backsides; twelve and thirteen year old girls dress as if they are headed to a nightclub for under-dressed adults, and this dress is not the exception, but the norm, and not just when they dress for school, or to hang out with their friends, but to Synagogue as well. Let's forget for a moment that this is G-d's house (because isn't G-d really everywhere?), but what about having enough self respect to cover one's self?

This doesn't necessarily rest solely with kids today, rather, with parents as well. I have actually seen one father bring his daughters to Synagogue wearing a lumberjack shirt, jeans, tennis shoes and suspenders; his girls are usually wearing some version of pajamas, and they don't even arrive in time to respect the sanctity of the Sabbath, or the tradition of Shabbat Prayer, rather, they seem to show up every week solely for the Shabbat lunch provided to Congregants, usually sponsored by the family of the Bar or Bat Mitzvah. I am not here to judge, really I am not, rather, I am demonstrating yet another example of how lack of respect has taken over society. Our society.

Do you remember hearing... "When I was your age, I walked a mile and a half to school uphill in the snow with an old pair of beaten up shoes, and..."? It sounds a little funny now, but I have found myself telling my kids that when I was their age, men wore ties and hats to ballgames, and our mothers would never even consider going to the grocery store without a full face of make-up, and newly pressed dress!

"Those were the days, my friend, (credit to Gene Raskin ca~1958), we thought they'd never end..." But, they did end. The question; my question, is, how do we get them back? How do we return, nit to the days of wearing Fedoras to ballgames, necessarily, but how do we regain the self respect that we once had, and in turn, have respect for others?

In a word, we need to look back, forward and sideways, and be more like my friend Jeff from Jeff's Gourmet and be "Smeichim b'Chelkeinu" (happy with our lots). We need to be grateful for every one of G-d's blessings, however small. We need to fill ourselves with gratitude that we awoke this morning,and with the hope that we will awake tomorrow to enjoy yet another wonderful day is this incredible place that G-d created for us.

We need to be head over heels in love. With life.

As the unknown poet during the Revolutionary War wrote: Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars, you have a right to be here; and whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt, the universe is unfolding exactly as it should. Therefore, be at peace with G-d, whatever you conceive Him to be, and whatever your labours and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace with your soul. With all its shams, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

My first fifty has taught me two things that I will now share with you.

As soon as you think these words, say them:

I love you and Thank you. For you will never know if you will have another opportunity.

With gratitude for my first fifty, and hope for my next fifty, I wish you Ahavah u'Vrachot; Love and Blessings from the Left Coast...

--Rabbi Alan Abrams

"Holding a grudge is like letting someone live Rent-Free in your head!"

2011-09-28T00:30:00.013-07:00

I wish I could take credit for the above quote, but it appeared on my Facebook and as we are at the end of the Jewish month of Elul, the month when we forgive and beg forgiveness before the end of our year, I knew that I just had to use the quote.

It is true, you know, holding a grudge IS like letting someone live in your head rent-free. The more we hold onto the negatives in life, the more we worry about them, and the more we worry, the more we are pre-occupied. With the negative.

Last week, I mentioned to a friend of mine who happens to own the absolutely best Kosher burger and hot dog place on earth (Jeff's Gourmet Sausage Factory) that I thought that he should open a second location; one closer to where I live. That discussion lasted about three seconds, when the manager of the store said to me, "you know, that is one man (Jeff) who really is "Sameach b'Chelko" (happy with his lot). Not only is he a great guy, but he is one lucky man.

Would it not be wonderful if we were all Smeichim b'Chelkeinu, happy with our lots? Would it not be truly wonderful to wake up every day and thank G-d for what we have, and never ask for more? I try, but it isn't always easy. We are trained in this Country to "keep up with the Jones's"; to strive for wealth and possessions; to work as little as we have to for the greatest reward. What we seem to forget, though, is that the greatest reward is just being here, enjoying this wonderful world that G-d has given us.

During the Yom Kippur service, ten times we recite a prayer that is the confessional. Al chet sheh chatanu, for these sins we have sinned. Even for those sins which we have committed unknowingly.

As all of us, often I find myself hurting those for whom I care. For this, I ask each of you whom I have hurt during this past year or in years past to forgive me; I ask you to pardon me and I ask you to atone for me.

I received today a greeting from my good friend Juan Bravo in Huanaco, Peru. It is with great pleasure that I share his thoughts, as they mirror mine. Juan writes: I wish you a Happy New Year; that G-d always grants you wisdom and many successes.

This year, the Jewish people begin the year 5772.

We have survived despite having been slaves for 400 years in Egypt and forty more wandering the wilderness of Sinai; despite the cruelty of the Roman armies who destroyed our Temple; despite the efforts of the soldiers of the Crusades and Inquisitions, Spanish and Portuguese; despite the efforts of Hitler and Stalin and Arafat; despite wars of Arab aggression that continue to seek our extermination and UN Resolutions that are full of hatred. Despite Abbas and Ahmadinijad's missiles that land daily in the playgrounds of Sderot that target our children, we have survived and will continue to survive and thrive.

This week when we go into our Synagogues to welcome the New Year, we pray that we all may enjoy peace and good. We pray that the year 5772 is a good and sweet year.

My family and I wish you a year full of good health, joy, laughter, personal success; sympathy and kindness; a year which is a year of peace for all of us; and for each of us, the opportunity to live and to thrive.

From Sunny Southern California, on the Left Coast, we wish you a Shana Tovah u'Metukah; Ahavah u'Vrachot, Love and Blessings.

--Rabbi Alan Abrams

How do we love G-d with all our heart, soul and might?

2011-08-24T01:47:00.002-07:00

Have you ever noticed that it seems that situations close together in chronology appear to compliment each other, even though they do not seem at all related?

A few weeks ago, I was talking baseball with my son, (which often we do), and I was trying to recall the name of a certain pitcher from the eighty's, and simply could not remember his name. Immediately, I remembered a patient whom I had visited in the hospital a few months ago and thought of his incredible knowledge of baseball history, and how he enjoyed talking baseball during our many visits. Right then, I wanted to call him, but got busy and after a few hours, the name of this pitcher became trivial and inconsequential; and its importance forgotten.

This past week, while leaving the hospital, I was approached by this wonderful man's wife in the parking lot, and she told me that his disease had progressed and that he was back in the hospital. On Monday night, he passed into Olam haBa, ending his pain and his suffering before we ever had the chance to talk baseball again. This saddens me.

These past two Shabbatot, we read from the Book of Deuteronomy, and the Parashot of V'Ethchanan and Ekev. In these weekly portions of Torah, we are told that it is our duty and obligation to love G-d with all our hearts, all of our souls and all of our might.

My dear friend and colleague, Rabbi Stewart Vogel led a tremendous discussion about love. The love of a parent; the love of a spouse; the love of G-d. Rabbi Vogel taught us to not just define love, but to look into ourselves to find our own definition.

In this way, I came about realizing that to love G-d, is to love ourselves, as we do our neighbors; as we love strangers. As we are all made in G-d's image, how could we not?

Without even being conscious of it, our work with seniors and the infirmed defines exactly how we can love G-d with all our hearts, souls and might. By merely visiting and providing them with the Judaic connection that many of them have lost so many years ago, we are able to allow our Neshamot, our souls connect with theirs and in doing so, we are loving G-d in a way that many of us have long forgotten.

With this in mind, I would like to tell you about Mobile Rabbinical Chaplaincy Services.

Providing Rabbinic visits to Jewish patients and residents of Skilled Nursing, Assisted Living, Board and Care and Hospice Facilities, our goal is to help bring Judaica to Seniors who, otherwise would not have a connection. In addition, we provide On-Call Chaplaincy services for emergency situations such as hospitalizations and End-of-Life events. We specialize in End-of-Life Chaplaincy and Palliative Care for patients with terminal illness, as well as providing grief counseling services for families in need.

As we never charge the patients or residents, our services are supported solely by the generosity of others and as a Religious Organization, our supporters are able to enjoy tax deductions as with any 501(c)3 recognized group.

Our goal is to recognize and serve as many seniors as we are able, and eventually to bring other Rabbis in many locations into the fold to help more people. In so doing, hopefully, we will all be able to love G-d in one more caring way.

Our Facebook page may be found at http://www.facebook.com/pages/Mobile-Rabbinical-Chaplaincy-Service/129786313782038, and our website is currently under construction, but will soon be available at http://www.mrcsonline.org.

Would it not be wonderful if we knew that our parents and grandparents had a Rabbi visiting them a few times a week, and available to them twenty-four hours a day in emergent situations?

When next we read the Shema and ve'Ahavta/ve'Haya im (Deuteronomy 6:4-9 and 11:13-21) let us all think of our seniors and what we all can do to show our love for G-d; with all our hearts; with all our souls and with all our might.

From Sunny Southern California, I wish you Ahavah u'Vrachot. Love and Blessings.

--Rabbi Alan Abrams

Isn't Every Day Father's Day?

2011-06-19T08:09:00.004-07:00

Last night, after a crazy evening of Karaoke, I sat with my son, visiting from College and watched a wonderful movie called "Jews and Baseball: A Love Story". It is a chronicle of baseball from a Jewish prospective, and a history of many Jewish ballplayers that played in the Major Leagues, and how they changed the game.

I found this to be the perfect movie to watch with Zac as the hour passed into Sunday, which, of course, is "Father's Day", as dubbed by Hallmark.

According to Encyclopedia Britannica, Credit for originating the holiday is generally given to Sonora Smart Dodd of Spokane, Washington, whose father, a Civil War veteran, raised her and her five siblings after their mother died in childbirth. She is said to have had the idea in 1909 while listening to a sermon on Mother's Day, which at the time was becoming established as a holiday. Local religious leaders supported the idea, and the first Father's Day was celebrated on June 19, 1910, the month of the birthday of Dodd's father.

For many of us, it is a time to spend with our families. Bringing dad breakfast in bed, playing a round of golf, davening together, or in my case, remembering my father and the times that we spent together, every day, not just on Father's Day.

As many of you may remember, my father and I had a bond unmatched and unbreakable. Of course, it included many days and nights at the ballpark, where, together, we had our own love story with Baseball.

Just as my father and I did, my son and I will spend the day today with what else? Baseball.

As with everyday, though, the day will be bittersweet. Today is the 1,257th father's day without my dad, and the fourth "official" one. It is also my first commercial father's day without Papi. Without the love of both of these great men, my life would have been not close to as rich.

My thoughts and prayers go out to everyone of you who today remember your fathers. To my friend Karla who said goodbye to her dad just a few weeks ago, I send love and support; to David I send open arms and a shoulder, and of course to Tom, my brother in life, I send both laughter and tears for past days and future years to raise our sons the way that our dads raised us.

To the mother of my wonderful children, I thank you for making me a father; it truly is the greatest job on earth.

And lastly, to Ben, whom I never had the chance to meet in life, I thank you for sending me the most precious of all gifts, your daughter. I promise to cherish her as did you.

See you at the Ballpark!

Ahavah u'Vrachot... Love and Blessings...

--Rabbi Alan Abrams

For Papi: My Other Dad

2011-04-14T21:47:00.014-07:00

A wise person once said "If you have nothing nice to say, say nothing at all".

Advice like this came from not only my own dad, but from our "Papi", the father of one of my closest and dearest friends, and a man whom I loved as much as anyone could love a second father. I dedicate my return to the keyboard to Papi, who was called home to haShem last week after a courageous battle with cancer. Through it all, though, when asked of his health, the reply was always: Never better. He always was.

During my own family struggles these past several months, (which kept me from writing), Papi was always the man of reason. He was always there for me with a joke and a smile, and every Friday night, he stood in proxy for my own dad and gave me the Parental Blessing. I will miss him.

And so I return now to this column after several difficult months, wherein I refrained from writing for fear that any negativity that I may have been feeling would seep out into this Column; and as such, I kept my pain (as well as my joy) to myself and kept my relatively big mouth shut; until now.

A year ago, I wrote that I find this time of year the "most wonderful" of all the seasons. Spring flowers are in full bloom; the grass on fairways is green and the sound of wooden bats cracking baseballs 400 plus feet over outfield walls has again made its way back into our lives.

The most wonderful sound, though, is the voice of the youngest at the table asking "Why is this night different from all other nights?", and our response that we were once slaves to Pharaoh in Egypt. Add to this, the magic of being surrounded by loved ones; friends and family and friends of family and the sum of this equation is simply this: It is the most wonderful time of the year.

This is a time to reflect on the past. A past of some 3,200 years ago when G-d took us from bondage and slavery with a strong hand and an outstretched arm and gave us Torah fifty days later. It is a time to celebrate our freedom from our slavery in Egypt and a time to rejoice in our independence.

I would agree with everything that I have just written with the exception of the existence of one minor question: Are we free from bondage?

A year ago at our Seder, my first in the presence of only my boys, my youngest son, who is now 15 years old noted that we each live in our own Mitzrayim; our own "personal Egypt". Whether we be slaves to our school work, our jobs, our rent or mortgage; car payment or simply slaves to our society or the expectations that society places on us, our freedom can and will come from one source and only from one source: Faith.

Faith that the sun will rise in the morning; faith that the moon will show its wonder after dark; faith that I will awake with the sun, breathe and again be able to enjoy another day in this mixed up, yet wonderful world. Above all, faith that one more person today, just one more person, will also begin to have this faith, for until many more of us do, our woes as a world of human beings will continue.

It is said and believed that each of us has reason to be here; that we each have a purpose in this life, and whether or not we know what that purpose is, is irrelevant. The mere fact that we are here says something.

The wonderful poetess Linda Ellis, in her poem "The Dash", wrote of the dash between the dates of birth and death on our tombstones:

For it matters not how much we own;
The cars the house the cash
What matters is how we live and love
And how we spend our dash.

Papi lived this way. His dash bright and knowing; full of life and living; caring and loving; and most of all, in awe of the wonders of G-d and of Torah.

May we too, this Passover season, find our own personal Egypt and from it, find our own peace, independence and salvation from affliction, slavery and bondage. By listening to the Papi in all of us, maybe the beautiful words of Linda Ellis will help us to realize what life is really about, and if it is still difficult, just look outside and wonder in the amazing world that G-d created for all of us to enjoy.

From the Left Coast in Sunny Southern California, I wish you a very happy and healthy Passover, Shabbat Shalom and as always, Ahava u'Vrachot. Love and Blessings...

--Rabbi Alan Abrams

The Shortest Day of the Year

2010-12-22T14:10:00.000-07:00

You may recall that several months ago I wrote a column called "Who Will Say Kaddish for Us" (April 10, 2010), and in it, I asked that we take a look at ourselves and ask ourselves what it means to truly be happy with who we are and with what we have.

After a long summer, filled with many changes, and an even longer autumn, replete with much tragedy and loss, I find myself again asking that we take yet another look at ourselves. This time, however, I ask: Who will say Kaddish for them.

Having spent many an hour in and out of Skilled Nursing facilities and Hospice facilities as a visiting Rabbi, (the key word being "in and out"), (except for an extended period as a patient), I had only done so in my professional role and until this past July, when faced with my grandmother's admittance to a like facility. Sadly, I had never felt that I had a reason for spending more than the requisite half hour or so with the specific patient whom I had intended on visiting, nor did I believe that I had the time to visit others; and even then, I had never allowed myself to become involved with them beyond a quick hello, or to offer a brief Mishaberach (healing) prayer on my way to my next stop in a busy day.

This of course changed in late June when my grandmother was sent to a Skilled Nursing facility following a terrible automobile accident, and my days this past summer were spent almost in their entirety at the facility. There, I visited not only her, but her neighbors and new friends; patients both in and out of consciousness; their families and friends, and of course, deeply rooted new friendships formed with both residents and with the dedicated staff of medical professionals and administrators.

And then, one day in late August, my grandmother died.

Would her neighbors and friends be now again forgotten? What about others in other homes? Who will visit them??

Most of these folks have no family, or what family they do have, rarely visit. Which, then leads me to ask: Who will say Kaddish for them?

The famous sage Hillel was known to have said "If I am not for myself, then who will be for me; and if not now, when?"

Are our friends in these homes and facilities not us? Are they not our grandparents, our uncles and aunts?? Our brothers and sisters??? And, if they are us, as I believe them to be, we owe it to them to visit them while they are still with us; and, we owe it to them to say Kaddish for them once they have passed on to Olam haBa.

For these reasons, I have begun a program of Bikurei Holim; visitation to the sick that encompasses many of the Skilled Nursing facilities in the Los Angeles area. My goal is to reach out to our brothers and sisters in these facilities by providing Chaplaincy services while visiting each patient three times weekly, and Palliative Care Chaplaincy when necessary, even if it means being on-call daily and nightly.

Our program, Mobile Rabbinic Chaplaincy Services will kick off officially on January 1, 2011. Should you be interested in helping us achieve these goals, please visit our website.

At this time each year, the time of the secular holiday season, I find myself often wondering where the "holiday spirit" that seems to be present this month goes almost immediately after New Years Day. I find that even trips down major boulevards bring visions of decorations and light displays them themselves call for us to be kind and gentle to each other, yet, at the same time, this time of year almost always makes me wonder why these feelings of "good tidings" are only present during the period between Thanksgiving and New Years.

Wouldn't it be nice if everyone were just as nice the rest of the year? What might we be able to do to make it so?

Last week, while driving to Los Angeles along the 101 Freeway, sitting in heavy traffic, as is normal for any time of day, I looked to the sky. It was dark; grey; cloudy; cold. It appeared to be ready to open up and rain. In an instant, though, this all became irrelevant, as a large flock of birds flew in a southerly direction in perfect formation. At that very moment I was reminded of the perfection that continues to remain in the world. It occurred to me that no matter the weather; no matter the grim outlook of ongoing war and economic strife and sickness that is all around us, the world is, in fact, unfolding exactly as it should, and that the smile brought to my face by the flying birds can be brought to everyone, by us, by just thinking of those birds, and passing the smile along to the driver next to us on the freeway, or the person crossing the street, or whomever you happen to meet next.

Maybe if we remember those birds and remember to smile a little more, we can keep the feeling of December all year long. It is worth a try, at least, isn't it?

From rainy damp and chilly Southern California, where the sun always shines (in our hearts, if no place else), I wish you Ahavah, uVrachot, Love and Blessings for a wonderful week and Shabbat Shalom.

--Rabbi Alan Abrams

When push comes to shove, blood is not thicker than water; Money is.

2010-10-11T08:18:00.017-07:00

My father, whom you have read about on numerous occasions; and whom I adored and loved more than any person, save for my wonderful children, taught me many things in our short forty-six years together.

All of which, so far, have turned out to be quite correct, with the exception of one glaring item, which, truth be told, is the one thing that should absolutely be correct, but sadly, these past few weeks I have learned otherwise.

"Blood is thicker than water", he would say. Relating of course to family bonds, loyalty and love; meaning that no matter what, in the end, blood, family loyalty and respect for that loyalty will triumph over anything and anyone who tries to break that bond of blood over water.

On Rosh haShana, of all days, I learned that this is not true, when the Mezzuzah that adorned the doorpost of my grandmother's home, in which I live, was stolen, and in it's place, a note was left by the thief, not only identifying himself by name, but admitting that he was the thief! Later in the day, he reached my by telephone (I initially answered as I saw the number and thought that the call was due to my mother being hospitalized) and told me to go get the note that he had left for me where the "F***ing 'Jew Thing' used to be on the door". He subsequently left me four voice mail messages threatening my life, using highly anti-Semitic rants if I did not leave my grandmother's house and move back to Arizona. He then showed up at my residence a few days later and pointed his fingers at me like a gun and reminded me through the window that he owns guns and knows how to use them.

The following day, I did what any normal person would do, and filed for protection with the Superior Court. I was granted a Temporary Restraining Order against this maniac, but lo-and-behold, he was somehow able to evade process of service.

What you may ask does this anti-Jewish piece of dirt have to do with blood being thicker than water? It so happens that he is married to my blood, and she, amazingly enough, condones his behaviour, and even smirked when played his voice mail messages, that, among other rants included his opinion that "Rabbis are just like Catholic Priests; they love to mutilate little boys by cutting off pieces of their penises." And that Rabbis have a "fake f***ing religion."

You see, it is all about the almighty dollar. And that makes me sad. This relative of mine once told me (following a thirteen year gap where the despicable husband interfered previously) that never again would she allow anyone or anything to come between us; that life was too short and that indeed, blood is thicker than water. If only that were true. The truth is, that her goal and that of her insane (born Jewish) Nazi husband is to sell the house in which I live, even though they have no right to it, legal or otherwise.

Her basis is to continue to accuse me of mistakes that I made thirty years ago. Who has not erred?

It is true that each of makes mistakes in our life. The goal is to remedy them, ask forgiveness from those whom we have hurt, atone for them to G-d and move on to better things and a better life. This is the basis for our wonderful faith. Absent this faith, what do we really have?

We would have a life absent joy. Absent the pure simcha of seeing our children go up to the Torah and read; absent the blessing of walking our children to the Chuppah (Wedding Canopy); absent the knowledge that our children have ascended in their lives and Jewish education and have become Jewish adults, we would have a life that is empty and void of happiness.

Should she continue on this path, my relative will never know this joy. For this, I am not angry. I am disappointed and I feel compassion and I feel pity. For the Joy of Torah is absent in her life, and the only G-d that she knows is green, with numbers on its corners and pictures of dead presidents on the front center panel. It is sad indeed.

May she awake someday soon and thank G-d for the day that she has been given; may she open her eyes to Torah and to the knowledge that all she was taught as a young girl is true and is good. May she walk away from the evil that surrounds her and encompasses her life. May she realize that blood is thicker than water. May she come home.

From Sunny Southern California and the Emek in the Maarav, I bid you Ahavah u'Vrachot; Love and Blessings...

--Rabbi Alan Abrams

Ashamnu. I have sinned.

2010-09-03T09:08:00.016-07:00

During the month of Elul, and in fact, no less than one week ago, I committed the biggest sin that any one of us can commit.

I have done exactly the opposite of what we are supposed to do during Elul, and not only have I not failed to approach each of you whom I have hurt over the past year and ask forgiveness, I have also done the unconscionable by committing the act of Lashon haRa, publicly and hurting more than one person with one misplaced stone.

Last Shabbat, I misused the pulpit of one of my dearest friends; one of my most respected Colleagues, and in doing so, not only hurt him, but tarred the reputations of a few very respected Rabbis in our community.

This was not done with intentional malice, however, it was done nonetheless, and for these transgressions I must request Slicha; I must request forgiveness from not only them, but from all who were present when I mis-spoke, and from all who read my latest Column.

The matter at hand was the cessation of the Falafel Grill in Agoura Hills to remain a Kosher restaurant. Without verifying with every person involved, I took the word of one person, and due to incidents at another Kosher restaurant last month, allowed myself to become enraged at a situation absent of the complete facts.

The fact is that yes, Falafel Grill is no longer a Kosher establishment; and yes, it is no longer a Kosher establishment due to an increase in the cost of Kosher meat; and yes, the supervising authority was Chabad of Conejo.

The larger fact, however, is that Chabad of Conejo did not increase these costs; they did not force the restaurant to abandon Kashrut, and in fact, during the several years that they held Hashgacha and supervision, never once did they charge Falafel Grill for their supervision, nor did they force Falafel Grill to use one vendor over another. They simply dictated which Shchita was acceptable to their standard. This is not only their right, but their responsibility. Unfortunately, the costs of meeting this standard were too high for this restaurant and they were unable to sustain their business.

That said, I ask forgiveness from each of the Rabbis affiliated with Chabad of Conejo, and hope that you will hear my request for Slicha.

To my dear friend, whose Bima I desecrated with my words of Lashon haRa, I ask your forgiveness, though I may not deserve it. We have known each other over forty years, and in the last two and a half years, as we have become closer, I look to you as a mentor, a guide, a teacher and a Rav. To my dear friend, I beg Slicha.

To those of you that were present last week, and to those of you who read this Column, I ask of you Slicha. I mis-spoke and I mis-wrote. I am sorry and pray that you will all forgive me.

On a similar note and grander scale, on this last Shabbat of the year, I pray that each of you that I have hurt during the past year please forgive me and grant me atonement.

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Last Thursday morning, at 7:15, my grandmother lost her battle against injuries sustained in an automobile accident that is the reason I find myself in Los Angeles.

Over the course of the last two and a half months, I learned many things about her life that were very surprising to me. I learned that many of the facts about her childhood, were not as I had been told previously. I am not sure how I feel about this.

What I do know, though, is that I will miss my Nana as long as I live, and hope to wake up every day to see roses in her garden.

The following I delivered at her Funeral this past Sunday:

ברוך דין האמת. יהוה נתן ויהוה לקח. יהי שם יהוה מבורך.
G-d has given and G-d has taken away.

Over the past three months, I have had more than occasion to think about what I would say today; How I would eulogize my grandmother; How I could possibly put into words what her life meant to me; what, she meant to me.

Over the past three months, day after day, I would sit at her bedside and in the beginning, during the first days and weeks after the terrible accident that would eventually take her life, I would talk with her; hearing stories about which doctor she taught to bake peach cobbler, or how she would constantly have to sweep and clean the first home in which she and my grandfather and mother lived upon arriving in California in 1946.

During the last four or five weeks, the conversation was much less; and most days, not even existent. Most days, if I was able to even give her a small bag of popcorn it was an accomplishment for her to know that I was there.

And even so, even though I have had all this time; even though I easily write and deliver eulogy after eulogy, in this and in other similar chapels, today I am without words. Today, I draw a blank. For there are no words that I know to write; no words that I know to deliver that could even begin to describe my grandmother to you.

As history will tell, on Friday, September 19, 1919, just one week before Rosh haShana, 5680, G-d provided a gift to Raechel and Nathan Weizer of 1800 East 105th Street, Cleveland, Ohio, in the form of a baby girl, Claire.

She took on the role of big sister with love and devotion, caring first for Alfred, and then for baby sister, Gladys, throughout her teen years and up until the time that she met the love of her life, the brother of her best friend Rhea; rough and tough, Herman. The troublemaker; the motorcyclist; the fighter, who snuck around and boxed under the assumed Goyishe name, H. Anthony Shea. Jews – don’t fight.

My grandparents ran away sometime during 1938 and married. It was just before wartime, and eloping seemed the best idea. From what I was told, the family didn’t really buy the whole secretive life, and shortly thereafter, they were married under a Chuppah, and set out to find and live the American dream.

During the Summer of 1939, Maryl was born, and seven years later, the three Shapiros made their move west, to Los Angeles.

Work did not come easily in Los Angeles for a twenty-six year old named Shapiro, so, one day, after passing by the store in Santa Monica, my grandfather listed his name on a job application as “Sears”, and was immediately hired. The official name change was finalized not long after.

Times were especially tough financially and some of the best memories that my mother has, involved skipping along the Venice Boardwalk with her mother on their way to a rare movie, with only an apple for refreshment. Motherhood was difficult also in those days, made even more so by the presence of post war hardships.

At the ripe young age of 42, Claire became a “Nana”, and it was then that she took flight.
I believe that her life’s mission was to be a mother, grandmother, and great grandmother. Even, a Matriarch. Our own version of a real life Alexis Carrington.

Thanksgiving after Thanksgiving; dinner party after dinner party; family birthday celebration, or other reason to get together became her time to shine, and shine she did.
The China was always perfect, as were the Silver and Crystal; the meals were well planned out and delicious. These were her calling cards.

My Nana was not a “Bubbie”. Never. Rather, she was the stereotype of elegance. It shined, as did she.

I only know how to properly set a table, because she taught me.

But this, dear friends, this does not scratch even the surface of who she was.
As wonderful as a grandmother as she was, I cannot even begin to describe her as a Great Grandmother. She carried with her a wonderful and genuine interest in others; especially her family.

My sons, Zac and Dylan, were unable to be here today, as they just started school this past week in Arizona, but Zac sent the following for me to share with you today:
I sincerely apologize for my absence. To all who are here, especially my Grandma, I send only my deepest love.

What is a Matriarch? The first definition on Dictionary.com reads: "The female head of a family or tribal line". If there was an entry for my Nana, that is exactly what it would say. Nana was the oldest member of our wonderfully dysfunctional family, and she held that position with pride for many, many years.

I met Nana 18 years ago, when I was just a baby. Truth be told, my fondest memories of my early childhood consist of visits with her, as well as my grandparents. I always felt that Nana and I shared a very special bond, and over these 18 years, that bond grew. I had so many wonderful conversations with her; I feel like we would talk for days on end whenever she called. The best thing about her is that she practically made excuses just to call me.

A great example of this was just recently, back in May, when she called me to tell me she was watching baseball and that it made her think of me. Truth is that I know for a fact that sports were the absolute least of her interests, but as far as she was concerned, if it made me happy, it made her happy.

I'll never forget last summer when I was in California and she engaged with me an entire discussion about the NBA Finals. And I was even stunned to find out that she actually knew who some of the players were! Anytime I spent time in her home, she always had some sort of article or magazine clipping that she had saved specifically for me. I actually still have every single article in a footlocker at home.

I think everyone can agree that she always had wonderful stories. And my favorite stories were the chivalrous and insanely romantic tales of Papa, the love of her life and one of my all-time heroes. And I'd like to end on a high note with a wonderful story of my favorite Nana being defended by her man:

Papa and Nana were driving on a city street. Well, Papa being the fearless driver that he was, totally and completely cut off a guy who was trying to make a lane change. Well, the red light came and the man had somehow gotten next to the car that Papa was driving. He enticed Papa to roll down the window, and the man immediately began swearing like a sailor.

Language that should NOT be used in front of a woman. Well, Papa couldn't stand for this. So what did he do? He got out of the car. Papa, standing (insert height here; I can't remember how tall he was) and the Pottymouth Motorist, standing well over 6 feet tall, faced off. And with one punch from the muscular former boxer that was Papa, the opponent was knocked to the ground. Papa immediately demanded an apology to Nana, in which the man did very fearfully.

Nana, I know that you and Papa are finally back together. May you spent the rest of eternity reminiscing about great memories like this and making up for all the lost time. I know that you must be thrilled, and I know that it's gonna be one hell of a reunion when I find myself up there with you in 102 years.

Take care of yourself up there. I love you and always will hold a special place in my heart for my favorite matriarch.

I think that Zac said it best, I know that it's gonna be one hell of a reunion when I find myself up there with you when my time comes.

We began the service earlier with the words, יהוה נתן ויהוה לקח.
G-d has given and He has taken away, but let us not believe, even for one moment that He took her away from us. No. Let us know in our heart of hearts that He took the disease from her; that he took her to my grandfather, the love of her life, and that He took her to the Grace and perpetual paradise of Olam haBa, of the next world, after leaving her with us for just a week short of ninety-one years, according to the Hebrew Calendar.

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May G-d grant each of Peace in the coming year. May He inscribe and seal us all in the Book of Life and may he continue show us that only His Torah is and remains our light and redemption.

With Ahavah u'Vrachot, Love and Blessings, I wish you Shabbat Shalom and Shana Tovah.

--Rabbi Alan Abrams

Taking off the gloves; Playing with fire... for the sake of Elul...

2010-08-13T16:58:00.023-07:00

In the last edition of this Column, you may recall that we spoke of a "Community" Kashrut company, who, while calling themselves "Orthodox" or "Frum", or whatever term they wish to use to describe their sacred and extreme high level of observance, was caught with their proverbial hand in the cookie jar, when in my presence, they were seen and heard extorting money from a small restaurant owner in the San Fernando Valley, before the Community (a code word for their real name) would let them reopen.

Incensed, I wrote about the incident in this Column and was almost immediately besieged by e-mails from readers; almost all of them positive in that it was about time that someone supported the "little guy"; some offering help in "getting the big guys"; and one e-mail, from a dear friend and Colleague warning me against "playing with fire", and one, from a reader in Chicago that accused me, angrily, of sticking my nose into other people's business.

Playing with fire? Are we not talking about Rabbis? With long black coats, disheveled beards, big hats and Tzitit hanging from their pants? They would hurt someone physically?? RIGHT BEFORE THE MONTH OF ELUL???

Friends: Is it not our job as Rabbis, Cantors, Educators and administrators to teach, inspire and try, however we must, to make living a Jewish life easier for those who seek to rejoin our Communities? Is it not the job of all of us to remember that Talmud teaches us that Kol Yisrael Arevim Zeh be Zeh? That ALL Jews are responsible each of us for one another? It is our job; it is our duty; it is our lot; period. Failing to believe this; failing to act accordingly and failing to take this responsibility seriously is simply, not very Jewish.

This week, Chaverai, on Rosh Chodesh Elul, on the day that we are supposed to be beginning our Slichot, our asking of others to forgive our behaviour from the past year; I learned that the Kashrut authority in Agoura Hills has caused the Falafel Grill on Kanan Road to abandon their distinction as a Glatt Kosher restaurant. Due to an almost three fold increase in the cost of Kosher meat from the only supplier that the Conejo Chabad will accept as Kosher, as well as significant increases in the costs of their supplies across the board, we, as a community, have lost another Kosher business.

Is it maybe not time to take off the gloves? Is it not time to maybe play with a little fire? Is it not time, my friends, to take off the gloves and fight for what is right? Is it not time for US to take control and follow the most simplest of all Mitzvot - veAhavta et Reecha kaMocha - and you shall love your neighbor as you do yourself. And, is it not time for us to take control and protect our brothers and sisters who are being wronged, not just in our own community, but by our own PEOPLE?

I suggest that we take back our playground. I suggest this by visiting Kosher restaurants and supporting them, at the same time making it clearly known to the restaurant owner(s) that you support them for providing a place for us to dine, but that you are not in support of the Mafia-Like thugs who pressure them.

I suggest that you forward this week's edition of Normal is Overrated to your e-mail contact list; I suggest that you leave a comment here for all to see pledging your support of our community; and I suggest that we all contact Kehilla Kosher in Los Angeles and voice our opinions on their business practices. And, when doing so, I suggest that we let them know that we forgive their sins and their transgressions in how they treat their clients, in that it is the month of Elul, after all. Just because they act with complete disregard for Yiddishkeit, does not mean that we will.

Kol Yisrael Arevim Zeh be Zeh. It is our job; It is our responsibility and it is our duty.

Shavuah Tov, Wishing you a great week from Sunny Southern California. As always, I send Ahavah u'Vrachot, Love and Blessings...

--Rabbi Alan Abrams

When a "Community" hurts "THE" Community

2010-08-01T00:28:00.011-07:00

Dear Friends:

Over the course of the many months that I have written this Column, I have had occasion to write about happy and sad times; I have had opportunities to introduce you to new artists and community events; and even have taken you into parts of my life and shared them with you.

None of these, however, even begins to compare with the sadness and shock of an event that I witnessed this past week, when a Jewish company took such advantage of another Jew, that the ugliness of their practices bodes us to not only pay attention, but to take action, before it is too late.

This "Community" company, (whom I may not name directly, under threat of reprisal from them), labels itself as amongst the most Observant of the most Observant; a company that in fact places itself at the highest level of Holiness by judging who is Kosher and who is not; and providing Hashgacha, on site inspectors who supervise a restaurant's activities.

Rather than opine at the moment, please permit me to simply tell you what happened this past week, and how it transpired before my very eyes and ears:

I went into a known Kosher restaurant in the Los Angeles area around 2:30pm one day this past week. I approached the counter, looked at the menu on the wall and ordered the "Lunch Special" which consisted of a hamburger, fries and a fountain drink. I was told by the counter girl that she could not prepare that for me as the "Rabbi was blessing the place". She looked over to three men sitting at a table and I approached, introduced myself and made it known that I have eaten there before; that I know it to be Kosher; and that I was accepting of the fact that a "Re-Hechshering" was in progress, but that I trusted the owner to not sell me non Kosher food, and asked that they please prepare the hamburger for me.

When I exited the restroom, I was again told that they could not prepare this order, but that I could have some Shawarma from earlier in the day, before the procedure had begun. Not wishing to find a different restaurant, I ordered the Shawarma and sat down to eat.

While seated, I heard the three men talking. The restaurant owner was pleading with the other two men, one American and one Israeli, to allow him to open and sell food. The two men say there and listened, but offered no solution. Two or three minutes later, the American said "I understand that you are upset. Let's do this, if you agree to buy the pans now, you could be open in no time. In fact, you could be open right now if you would just buy the pans."

My friends, I thought that Tony Soprano was sitting at that table. I felt as if I was in a scene from a Coppola movie, or that Ray Liotta was going to jump out of the back with a sawed-off and save the day. Did I hear right? Was the owner of this small Falafel stand being extorted?? And, if so, could this possibly be done in the name of Torah??? NO WAY, I told myself, and then, I felt compelled to ask these guys, and ask I did.

"Why are you keeping this man's restaurant closed?" "Because he is not yet Kosher", I was told. "Why is he not yet Kosher?", I asked, "He has been Glatt Kosher for YEARS", I continued. Their answer blew me away. According to this man, Larry Somebody, the restaurant was not Kosher enough, and the pans in question (drip pans used UNDER the Shawarma Rotisseries, NOT for food that would be eaten) might have come in contact with something bad, I was told, and therefore, the restaurant was not Kosher until he said that it was Kosher.

Welcome to Extortion 101.

I returned the following day and the owner thanked me for trying to help him. The Israeli man was back and sitting at the same table, while playing with his iPhone and getting up occasionally to make a plate of food (which, no he did not pay for). This "on site inspector", by the way, earns $15 per hour, paid by the restaurant, which is in addition to the $675 per quarter that the restaurant pays the "Community" for their super supervision.

I asked the owner what had transpired. Why did he feel compelled to change Kashrut companies and was told by him that he had been approached and advised that were he to not change to this "Community", "The Ashkenazim would not patronize his store", thus, causing him financial loss.

Those are the facts. That is what I saw and what I heard. I called this "Larry" person on Wednesday morning, and informed him that I was going to write about this incident in my Column, and was warned that should I publish this piece, I could be hurting my new friend the restaurant owner. Now that this has published, let's see what happens.

My friends, we all know that we live in a time when we cannot afford to fight each other. We are constantly and consistently being threatened by both Arab States and renewed World Anti-Semitism. We are facing possible passing of a maniacal new law in Israel that could affect the legal conversions of thousands of Jews, and we are living in an ages where the Presidential Administration, for the first time in history, is clearly Anti-Israel and Pro-Palestinian (read: Terrorist).

We are facing the largest number of Jews who are non-affiliated in history, and every day, we hear of yet another Shul closing its doors.

These are the times that we must be united. This is not the time that we can sit back and watch the world go by. This is the time that we must stand strong, together, and take action to prevent these situations. I ask and urge you to speak with the restaurants owner(s) the next time that you dine in a Kosher restaurant. I urge you to ask who supervises them, and I implore you to ask them if they have been treated in such a way and to pay attention to their answers. I urge you to speak with your friends and neighbors; your Rabbis and teachers. I ask that you please forward this Column to everyone that you know and that you make this serious issue known throughout your Community. Maybe it can be a start to ending this corrupt and horrible behaviour.

As a footnote, I can tell you that in looking at the Community's website this evening, I noticed that several pages (listing which restaurants which they supervise, for instance), have been removed, and that in the past few days, much of their website is no longer functional. Maybe this is a good thing.

I thank you for listening. I thank you for reading and above all, I thank you for helping us all bond together to prevent this crime from continuing to plague our brethren.

With Ahavah u'Vrachot, Love and Blessings from the Left Coast and Sunny Southern California, I bid you Shavuah Tov; a good week. May magical good wishes find you as always.

--Rabbi Alan Abrams

For Brandon (z"l)

2010-07-17T18:44:00.004-07:00

At Two O'clock in the afternoon of July 18, 1991, I joined a club. It is a club that boasts a membership that unfortunately grows daily, and it is a club in which not one member has ever requested entry; most of us, in fact, try for as long as we can to deny our affiliation.

We do so at times by living as if all is well; and we do so at times by conveniently forgetting that precise minute when we entered, never to be permitted exit.

At Two O'clock in the afternoon of that dreadful day, I held the lifeless body of my beautiful little son in my arms and kissed his face; knowing that the next time I would see him would be at the Cemetery on Tisha b'Av, when we would lay his young body to rest.

I had joined the worst club imaginable: The club of parents who bury their children.

His face was cold, and his lips were blue. His Neshama, his Soul, had left his tiny body never to return in this World. I was sad and I was angry. WHY? WHY would a Loving G-d that I knew to be a Loving G-d take the tiniest of his children, even before my Brandon had a chance to make his impact?

For seventeen years, as I placed phylacteries on my left arm every morning, and read Morning prayers I asked G-d why. And for seventeen years, I had no answer. My answer appeared two years, six months and seven days ago when I eulogised my father at a Cemetery not fifteen miles from where my Brandon is buried.

For those of you who remember my dad, I have no real need to remind you who he was. For those of you who never had the absolute blessing of having known him, I will tell you that he was a man who was genuinely loved by every single person whose life he touched, and that he touched every person whom he had ever met. My father was, in the simplest of terms, a Tzadik. A righteous man; a man who knew who he was, and a man who was so in love with his grandchildren that his every thought and his every smile were both brought to him by them, or dedicated to them.

That being said, how could G-d not have a beautiful grandson waiting his arrival into Gan Eden, the paradise that is the Olam, haBa, the World to come. Enter my Brandon. My beautiful boy was taken to be there for his Grandfather's arrival. Who better to greet my dad in Heaven, but his Grandson whom he had not had the time to know or grow close to, as G-d's plan was different. I no longer ask why.

On Shabbat, somewhere between the Kiddush and Motzi, we parents place our hands on the heads of our children and offer our Blessing. I pardon your indulgence for, but a moment as I ask that you stand with me as I send this Blessing to my beautiful boy on the nineteenth anniversary of his passing:

Brandon, I know now that G-d has made you as Ephraim and Menashe; He has Blessed you and He has kept you; He has shined his countenance upon you and been gracious onto you; and above all, G-d has kept you with Him and has brought you Peace.

We do not always know the reasons behind the magnificent works of haShem. It is at times difficult to not know and to not understand. It can be frustrating and at times even maddening. But, for those times that we do understand, Oh, for those times, the world, even in its heightened levels of craziness becomes a truly enlightening and beautiful place.

From the Sunny Left Coast, I send Ahavah u'Vrachot, Love and Blessings.

--Rabbi Alan Abrams

Why Must we Tolerate?

2010-07-08T10:42:00.000-07:00

On my way to California a couple weeks ago, my very wise eighteen year old had a very interesting and enlightening thought. He asked me, "What is Tolerance? Why must we have to tolerate anyone?"

I thought about his question, and listened to him as he explained his reasoning: If we were all created in the image of G-d (Genesis 1:27), then, we are truly all the same, regardless of our skin colour, belief system or sexual orientation or preference, right? Or are we?

If I am of the belief that we are all created in G-d's image, I must, by definition, believe that we are all the same, and be this the case, we must be accepting of others, not "tolerant".

BARUCH haSHEM, THANK G-D, we are all the same now and no longer must we be "politically correct" and "tolerant". Would this not be a truly wonderful world, if this were a true statement.

The problem, my friends, is that we really are all the same, or made the same, but some of us have slightly different views on things. Not necessarily the colour of car that we prefer, or our taste in foods, but matters of somewhat greater importance, like for instance, our cousins in places like Syria and Iran who live their lives to end ours; Gazans who enjoy hiding behind young children while shooting missiles at our children; Youths with shaved heads in Europe who continue to paint Swastikas on buildings and Government officials who are more interested in the Human Rights of admitted Terrorists and where Jews build housing for Jews, than the deaths of hundred of thousands in Africa, Asia and other third world locales.

Must we be tolerant of these people, or is it enough and more correct to be accepting? To be "tolerant", according to dictionary sources is: the ability to accept something while disapproving of it In social, cultural and religious contexts. Does this not mean that we deem ourselves right and they are wrong?

Are we not better off being "accepting" (willingly or readily accepting or receiving; receptive)? I believe that we should be accepting. In fact, I completely accept the fact that the Arab World wishes to push us into the sea and destroy us. I also completely accept that we must protect ourselves, and with G-d and Torah, we will be able to overcome their intentions; I completely accept that the United States, and the State of Arizona in particular has a massive border control problem; and I completely accept that the current Federal Administration is the first to be blatantly anti-Israel and anti-Semitic, yet I am also fully accepting of the fact that Israel does not need the United States nearly as much as the United States needs Israel.

I am also totally accepting of the reality that while we each have our own ability to choose, I believe that G-d wants, but one thing from us, and that is to be good people; to love our fellow person as we do ourselves (maybe even more than we do ourselves), and to love Him with all of our heart, soul and strength; and that it is up to us to accept G-d for who He is to each of us individually, and to not simply "tolerate" people whose beliefs are different than ours.

It is also incumbent on us to accept ourselves for who we are. Don't ask, don't tell? Forget it! Be YOU. I'll be me and your neighbour down the block well be her. Accept yourself as yourself. Be proud of yourself; your accomplishments as well as your dreams. There are no failures, just a bunch of tries that have not yet been successful. And should you desire to become a better you, ask any Rabbi what the Torah says. I'm certain that he will look it up for you.

From the Left Coast and Sunny Southern California, I wish you Ahavah u'Vrachot, Love and Blessings...

--Rabbi Alan Abrams

We met at Sinai.

2010-05-18T18:01:00.008-07:00

We met at Sinai

On the morning of the third day there were peals of thunder and lightning, and a heavy cloud over the mountain, and a very loud trumpet blast, so that all the people in the camp trembled. But Moses led the people out of the camp to meet G-d, and they stationed themselves at the foot of the mountain. Mount Sinai was all wrapped in smoke, for the L-RD came down upon it in fire. The smoke rose from it as though from a furnace, and the whole mountain trembled violently. The trumpet blast grew louder and louder, while Moses was speaking and G-d answering him with thunder. When the L-RD came down to the top of Mount Sinai, he summoned Moses to the top of the mountain, and Moses went up to him. Exodus 19:16-19

It was there, that I asked why and it was there that I first knew the answer. It was there that we sat, you and I, and the rest, some 600,000 of us in all, and while staring at a rumbling mountain, it was there, that i first saw your smile. It was there that we first heard that we shall remember the day Shabbat and keep it Holy, though, we somehow knew this before; and it was there that we learned of the prohibition against murder, stealing and jealousy.

It was there, that we knew that we could begin to love G-d and not fear him, as, who other than a loving G-d would give us his Holy Torah to cherish, keep and love for all time?

At Sinai, you and I sat. We listened and we rejoyced. We became fearful when Moses did not return for day after day, but we waited, some of us more patiently, for him to return with the Laws; and he did.

Then G-d delivered all these commandments: "I, the L-RD, am your G-d, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, that place of slavery.

You shall not have other G-ds besides me. You shall not carve idols for yourselves in the shape of anything in the sky above or on the earth below or in the waters beneath the earth;

You shall not bow down before them or worship them. For I, the L-RD, your G-d, am a jealous G-d, inflicting punishment for their fathers' wickedness on the children of those who hate me, down to the third and fourth generation; but bestowing mercy down to the thousandth generation, on the children of those who love me and keep my commandments.

"You shall not take the name of the L-RD, your G-d, in vain. For the L-RD will not leave unpunished him who takes his name in vain.

"Remember to keep Holy the Sabbath day. Six days you may labor and do all your work, but the seventh day is the Sabbath of the L-RD, your G-d. No work may be done then either by you, or your son or daughter, or your male or female slave, or your beast, or by the alien who lives with you. In six days the L-RD made the heavens and the earth, the sea and all that is in them; but on the seventh day he rested. That is why the L-RD has blessed the Sabbath day and made it holy.

"Honor your father and your mother, that you may have a long life in the land which the L-RD, your G-d, is giving you.

"You shall not kill.

"You shall not commit adultery.

"You shall not steal.

"You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.

"You shall not covet your neighbor's house.

You shall not covet your neighbor's wife, nor his male or female slave, nor his ox or ass, nor anything else that belongs to him." Exodus 20: 1-14

One by one these Commandments were read, out loud for us all to hear, but we had heard them before, had we not? We did know to honor our parents and to not murder, or steal, did we not? Were these Mitzvot not left in our hearts by G-d before we ever got to Sinai?

Did we not know decency and respect and truth even before receiving Torah?

Now that we have Torah, why have we stopped knowing? Why have we stopped caring? How do we start to care again? When do we look to ourselves for the answers to the questions that plague us all today? The answer, my friends is now.

It is now that we must begin again. To care and to know; to love and to respect; to believe and to have faith that the lessons planted so deeply within our hearts so very long ago, we placed there for a reason. Let us all treat each other with the love and caring with which we would enjoy being treated.

We met at Sinai, you and I. Amidst a thundering mountain, pillars of fire and smoke; and the sounds of Shofar calling us closer to our Creator. Yes. We met at Sinai, and I pray that one day we may all return in spirit to reclaim what G-d gave us that day.

From the Emek in the Midbar that we call Arizona, I wish for you Ahavah u'Vrachot, Love and Blessings for a Chag Sameach, a Happy and Enchanting Shavuot.

--Rabbi Alan Abrams

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Who is this Glenn Beck, and WHY DO WE CARE? - A retraction and correction

2010-04-25T15:20:00.001-07:00

Shortly after publication of the below column last night, I received a barrage of e-mails, many of them unsubscribing to this Column due to my error in not better explaining myself, leaving readers with the idea that I somehow championed Glenn Beck and his notable anti-Semitic broadcasts. My intention was nothing of the sort, and my citation of Mr. Beck's latest broadcast was only to show that I believe that times such as ours call for a return to our own individual faith.

My intent was not to be perceived as bigoted, or anti anyone. Please re-read below and specifically take note of my reply to Mr. Cesca.

It often seems that whatever the Weekly portion of Torah that we read, something is going on around us that makes that week's Parasha that more meaningful. Such it was this week as well, with our reading of a combined section, Acharei Mot (After the Death of Aaron's sons) and Kedoshim (Holies).

The second sentence in Kedoshim speaks to me like almost no other in the Torah. With G-d speaking to Moshe (Moses), he says: Go tell all of the Tribes of the Children of Israel YOU ARE HOLY BECAUSE I AM HOLY. This, is a huge statement. This statement, above all others to me, gives us the desire to perform Mitzvot. Please allow me to digress.

I have a friend who enjoys discussing Halakha. As it is one of my favorite subjects to discuss, I too enjoy these conversations, but only to a certain point. I only find it fun when we are able to debate (we seldom agree) certain parts of Halakhic wisdom with answers that do not include the words "because haShem says so". My response is generally something like "WHERE DOES haSHEM SAY SO?" The answer is usually the conversation ender. More often than not, I am asked if I have ever studied Talmud, and without any Talmudic back-up or citation, we each sign off, or hang up the phone. Most often, I am thoroughly exhausted from the last five minutes of the conversation (read: debate) as I find it difficult to discuss a topic where one of the parties claims a fact that I know to be false, yet has no back up; i.e. G-d states in Talmud that it is against Halakha to use Facebook Instant Messenger on Shabbat. First, to my knowledge, G-d doesn't state anything in Talmud, and secondly, I am pretty sure that Facebook's Instant Messenger was not around in Talmudic times.

This past week, we got into a discussion over what it means to be "Observant". My friend stated over five times that to be an Observant Jew, one must fear G-d. One must perform Mitzvot because G-d is watching and will confront us with our transgressions, so we must follow the Mitzvot out of fear of being seen and fear of being caught.

I, however, see the performances in an entirely different light. I see the performance of Mitzvot as acts of love of G-d and for G-d's blessing and pleasure. Today's Parsha explains this to us in one sentence: YOU are holy, because I am holy. As we are created in the image of G-d, we must have G-d in us, and, if we have G-d in us, we, by definition, MUST be holy. To me, there is no better reason to perform Mitzvot.

The second most powerful Commandment, to me, is given to us sixteen verses later, when G-d commands us to love our fellow man, as we do ourselves. Midrash teaches that upon a request of a potential Convert to learn Torah while standing on one leg, The Sage Hillel replied with this verse,and told him that this verse is all of Torah. I ask then, does it matter who of us is Jewish or Christian or whatever? Is this Commandment not universal; and at the same time, does it not just make perfect sense?

Lately, I have heard the name Glenn Beck often. I have never taken the time to google Mr. Beck, or investigate his radio or television show; nor have I read any of his writings, and could not even begin to speak of him with any opinion whatsoever. Earlier this evening, however, I came across an article written by a gentleman by the name of Bob Cesca. I had never heard of Mr. Cesca, but my attention was grabbed by reading his headline attacking Glenn Beck. I must admit to having no knowledge of Beck either prior to reading Cesca's column, other than having heard Glenn Beck's name. After reading the column, and listening to a recording from Beck's show, and, with this week's Parasha so clearly in my mind, I felt compelled to write the following letter that I sent to Bob Cesca, with a copy sent to Beck:

Dear Mr. Cesca.

First, I must say that prior to ten minutes ago I had never heard of you, nor had I any idea who Glenn Beck is. That I may be burying my head in the sand and not paying attention to the various pundits, critics, broadcasters and so forth, might be an understatement, but it is not from lack of interest; it is more from lack of time to listen to so many varying opinions, yet, seemingly, nobody doing anything other than talking.

I must apologize for this, as you and Mr. Beck and whomever else is out there has a message and an opinion, and since the part of the Constitution that protects free speech is still in effect, I applaud your efforts, albeit it cautiously.

I learned of you from an article that I somehow came across entitled “Glenn Beck: the Televangelist Con Man Selling God's Plan for America”. As I frankly had never heard or seen anything that either you or Mr. Beck has said, I was curious, so I decided to read your column and listen to his tape as linked from your story.

I thank you for writing your column, and I thank you for posting the link to Mr. Beck’s broadcast.

I am not going to take sides, as the above mentioned Constitutional right continues to exist (for now), and personally, I am happy that we all have this right to speak our peace. You both are fortunate, very fortunate to have such large audiences to which you are able to proliferate.

I do, however, take issue with your attitude toward Mr. Beck’s opinions in general, and I must ask you with all due respect, do you have a personal knowledge of Mr. Beck’s relationship with G-d? I can certainly tell you that I do not, nor do I have personal knowledge of your relationship with Him; nor do you or Mr. Beck have personal knowledge of my relationship with G-d. That being said, I was surprised to see a man of your integrity call another names in a manner that is both highly prejudicial, and usurps his rights under not just the Constitution, but rights given to us by G-d.

Sir, I do not know your religious background, nor will I ever attempt to convince you that any one way to pray is better than another, but I will go so far as to ask you if you believe that it is acceptable to treat another or speak of another in a way which would be hateful to you?

I believe, as do you, as does Mr. Beck, as I would hope does most of the world, that we are living in very difficult times. As a Rabbi, I would agree with Mr. Beck that in times like these, seeking our individual faith to help us to guide ourselves is most beneficial. Whether Mr. Beck was spoken to by G-d directly or not, I have no way of knowing, nor does anyone. Whether or not I agree with his political opinion(s) is of no importance.

I have now heard back from Mr. Cesca. He wrote as follows:

Hello Rabbi Abrams,

I appreciate your thoughtful email. A couple of thoughts in response.

First, the Constitution only protects "freedom of speech" with regards to government lawmaking. In other words, the first amendment protects speech from government encroachment. As a citizen, I'm well within the permission of the founding documents to take issue with a commentator -- and even to call for him or her to be removed from the airwaves (though that's not what I'm suggesting for Mr. Beck).

Secondly, I am not questioning Mr. Beck's religion (Mormonism) or his right to practice it. In fact, I'm suggesting that by injecting religion into government, government will be more capable of interfering with religion. Hence, the purpose of separating church and state.

Thanks again, Rabbi.

Bob

I will reply now in this public forum:

After doing much more research into Mr. Beck, I can honestly say, Bob, that you appear to have been quite kind and generous with your words toward him. I have not met him, and since a mere twenty-four hours ago, I literally had no idea what the man stood for, or stands for, I was errant in my judgment to put myself in any position to defend him. For this I apologize.

My question now turns to ask again, Who is this Glenn Beck, and WHY DO WE CARE?

If you were to surf to his web page, you would find that Mr. Beck is a Talking Head on, I believe both radio and Cable television that seems to find fault with about anyone and everyone who is not, well, Glenn Beck. He seems to use these air waves to spew hatred and bigotry with Anti-American and Anti-Jewish rhetoric, and via PayPal, he appears to gain monetarily on a daily if not hourly basis.

Why do we care? We must care. For to be as I have been, with my head in the sand is at least as dangerous as Mr. Beck is to not just our society, but to the world.

We are holy, because G-d is holy. We do the right thing because G-d would want us to do the right thing. Last night, in agreeing with Glenn Beck, even if just barely and on the surface, I did not do the right thing. I believe that I am now.

I remind you that today is day 1,401 since the capture of our Brother, Gilad ben Noam v'Aviva Shalit by Terrorists in Gaza. Please remember him in your prayers.

In addition, we continue to pray for my Colleague and friend, Rabbi Bramly during this very difficult time. May G-d continue to bring him and his family strength blessings.

From the Emek in the Midbar that we call Arizona, I wish you Ahavah u'Vrachot, Love and Blessings...

--Rabbi Alan Abrams

Remembering and Celebrating - 62 Years

2010-04-19T19:25:00.014-07:00

At precisely midnight last night in Phoenix, the clock struck 10am in Israel and a loud siren sounded for two minutes. Traffic stopped. Workers stopped and pedestrians stopped. Everyone and everything stopped. And remembered. The Country stopped to remember the thousands who have given their lives, so that we may live ours.

At midnight last night in Phoenix, Arizona, I listened to "Reshet Gimel", the all Israeli Music radio station from Jerusalem, as names of fallen heroes were read, one at a time, along with their rank, home town and age. As surviving fathers called in to the radio station, and dedicated their son or daughter's favorite song to their blessed memories, I felt at once proud to be a Jew; to be a Zionist; a Rabbi and teacher of Judaics and of Israel and a future Oleh, but at the same time, I felt guilty to be standing alone next to my bed in Arizona, instead of standing with our brothers and sisters in stopped traffic in Nahariya or Eilat.

I felt the pain of those fathers who had called the radio station, and the mothers who would never again greet their children on Friday evening; and I felt the pain of my friend, my brother, Ron Kehrman, who wrote in today's YNet section of Israel's Yedioth Acharonoth of his beloved Tal, who was murdered by terrorists 2,602 days ago; and I felt the pain of Noam and Aviva Shalit, who have been praying for the safe return of their son, Gilad for 1,395 days since his capture.

We remember the friends that we lost, and we remember the brothers and sisters that we never met. We remember the victims of the Beach Road attack, and our athletes in Munich; Mike's Place and the Country Club and the Passover Seder in Haifa. We remember our fathers and uncles and cousins who fought for our independence in 1948 and we remember the heroes that valiantly served in Gaza just a year ago. We remember Astronaut Ilan Ramon who perished on the Space Shuttle Columbia, and we remember Yoni Netanyahu who bravely led his men into Entebbe Airport in Uganda on July 4, 1976 to save Jews hijacked on an Air France flight to Paris.

And as I stood and silently said Kaddish, quietly asking G-d for the strength to continue, while magnifying His name, I prayed that this, please G-d, be the last year that we add names to the list of fallen brothers and sisters. And after shedding more than a few tears, I remembered that in less than twenty-four hours, we will be celebrating Yom haAtzmaut, Israel's 62nd birthday. A birthday made possible partly by the heroism of those whom we had just remembered, and whose lives must be avenged; not necessarily by bloodshed, but by our mere survival, which depends, solely on us.

Our survival means Israel's survival . They are synonymous. The survival of our State is absolute in like to survival of our people. Period. And in order for our State to survive, and in turn for our people to survive, we must, without question, see the following take place:

We must see an increase in our population within Israel. This means Aliyah. This means packing up our toys and going home. This means, if we are serious about saving our State, if we meant it when we said "Next year in Jerusalem" just three weeks ago at the end of our Seder meals, then, the time is now. Not next week, not next month, not next year. The time is now to go to the Nefesh b'Nefesh website and start the process. It is time to go home.

We must have Israeli leadership that believes in (1) a Jewish Israel; (2) a One State Solution with those who call themselves Palestinians, by either disarming them and their acceptance of Israel's right to exist as a Jewish State, or face immediate deportation from Israel and her territories; and (3) a Leader who will not be bullied by foreign nations dictating our rights as a sovereign State.

We must see a change in the way that we treat each other. We must eliminate these labels that do nothing, but divide us as a people. We are Jews. Does it matter if we are Orthodox Jews or Reform Jews or Martian Jews? Do we honestly think that G-d cares? We have 613 Mitzvot to perform (less Mitzvot specifically regarding the Beit Mikdash [Temple and Sacrifices]). Let's do our best. It would help, however, if we at least would remember to try and like each other, and treat each other in a manner that would not be hateful to ourselves, were we treated alike.

We must remember that this world was created by G-d. We must treat it as such. What do you think these earthquakes and tsunamis and volcanoes are all about? G-d is talking to us. Shouldn't we listen?

When the sun goes down tonight, the date will change to 5 Iyar. Sixty two years ago, on 5 Iyar, at the Tel Aviv Museum, David Ben Gurion and others gathered to proclaim the formation of the Jewish State, The State of Israel.

Through seven wars and with the grace of G-d, we have survived.

Our little Country has given the world technology that we use every day, including Instant Messenger software, Cell Phone technologies and Texting capabilities. Israel has given the world 9 Nobel Laureates; and has more companies listed on NASDAQ than any other Country, save for the United States. I could go on and on.

Instead, I'll ask you to go out today, and find a good Falafel. If you cannot find one where you are, go online and find the Nefesh b'Nefesh website (http://www.nbn.org.il/) and make plans to go home.

From the Midbar that we call Arizona, Ahavah u'vrachot, Love and Blessings...

--Rabbi Alan Abrams

Who Will Say Kaddish for Us?

2010-04-10T18:06:00.016-07:00

As much as I love the week of Passover, I think sometimes that I love the week after Passover more. I seem to reconnect with people that prior to the holiday, I had not seen in a while (usually since the High Holidays). They seem to be happier than in the fall; full of excitement for the arrival Spring and all that Spring and Summer offer in matters of renewal and relaxation, much of this, I believe to be due to the warmth of sunshine.

The one not so pleasant happening that comes the week after Passover, however, is the arrival of Yom haShoah. Holocaust Remembrance Day. A day that in it's name alone, brings us back to the reality that this abominable tragedy not only happened, but the realization that should we fail to remember our not so distant past; should we fail to stand up and shout "NEVER AGAIN", and mean it, we could once again be facing extinction. IF we forget. IF we don't stand up, and stand up now.

A theme was selected for remembrance this year. The theme, "Who will say Kaddish for me?" Who will recite the memorial prayers for me?

A website has been designed, http://www.remember-us.org/, where each of us, especially Bar and Bat Mitzvah students can make a small donation and receive the name of a child who perished under Hitler's thumb, and dedicate their studies to these children who were not able to complete their own studies due to the Holocaust.

One such Bat Mitzvah student, Simcha from Ohio has dedicated her studies and Bat Mitzvah to a girl named Sima Ring.. Simcha wears Sima's name in a locket and recites her prayers in Sima's name. I have never met her, but am proud of her nonetheless. It is my understanding that she has had a difficult time of it lately. Not only am I proud of Simcha, but I also know that her mother will never have to ask the question of, "Who will say Kaddish for me?". For me, Simcha in Ohio stands out above most Bar and Bat Mitzvah kids. She cares; she is not afraid to show it; and she is proud to be a member of our proud people. To Simcha and her family, even though I cannot be in Columbus on this coming Wednesday, when she will rise to the Torah as a Bat Mitzvah, I will raise a glass of grape juice in "LeChayim " to Simcha.

Who will say Kaddish for me? Who will say Kaddish for you? Who will say Kaddish for us?

My children will, I am certain. Hopefully your children will stand for you. Will their children stand for them?

This past week, I was asked if in my opinion, the economy would return to what it once was. I promise you that anyone believing that I am qualified to answer this question as an expert economist needs some serious inter-cranial examination, as do I were I to pretend to answer with economic expertise. What I did reply, however, was that in my opinion, as long as we continue to worry about it, and continue to worry about what we no longer have, rather than being happy and thankful for what we do have, the economy will remain in the exact position that it currently resides. As long as we care about what our neighbor has, or what he drives, or how much money he makes, we deserve to remain wanting. This may sound cruel and uncaring, but in reality, I feel it to be the most caring answer that I can give.

Pirkei Avot states that a "person is as happy as he makes up his mind to be". As soon as we can be happy with what we have, and grateful for what we have, we too will be rich.

For a moment, I must flash back to last week and bring you an update. Should you remember the man who sent me that nasty anti-Semitic e-mail a few weeks ago, he has sent me another in response to reading last week's column. This week he wrote:

Thank you for your consideration, Maybe you are right but, I got cheated so bad by this guy that it was difficult to deal with, I was being cheated big time and I have to say that made me sick at my stomach. I am sure all Jewish folks are not like that but this guy is horrible. Like some of our people.

Sir: You have just made Teshuvah. Doesn't it feel better?

On a side note, I remind you that today is day 1,384 of captivity for Gilad Shalit. Please join in praying for his speedy safe return from what was once Egypt.

While we pray for the return of Gilad to his parents, I ask you to please join in praying for my Colleague and friend Rabbi Bramly and his family, as well as the families of all involved in their own tragedies. May G-d be with them all and bring them strength to overcome these terrible times in their lives. May G-d soon return them to their lives and their children and to all things good.

On Tuesday of this coming week we remember the Six Million who were senselessly murdered by a man in the position of power. May we all not only remember, but realize that should we fail to shout NEVER AGAIN; should we continue to go through life with blinders on, following a Self-Appointed Pied Piper of Hamlin, we could be next.

From the Emek in the Midbar of Arizona, I wish you a Shavuah Tov. b'Ahavah u'Vrachot, with love and blessings, I remain...

Yours in Torah...

--Rabbi Alan Abrams

Is March Madness really about Basketball?

2010-03-26T15:27:00.000-07:00

As the grass gets greener, and the days get longer, Northerners make plans to head back north, managers and coaches shore up their pitching staffs, regulars start playing seven innings and 40 year old veteran hangs 'em up for good while the twenty-one year old phenom from Waxahatchee Creek tries to navigate the press corps that he will hopefully face daily for the next ten years. What Spring Training does, better than anything, is prepare us for Summer. Warmer days, swimming pools, family picnics and the Fourth of July. July 1st in Canada; le 14eme en France. All in all, and wherever we live, these days all celebrate independence. Freedom.

In our Jewish world, however, one day ranks even higher than Canada Day or the 4th of July. That day, this coming Tuesday, is the 15th day of the Jewish month of Nissan. We are commanded on this day to observe, recall, remember and finally to celebrate our Exodus from Egypt and our liberation from bondage and slavery fashioned by G-d’s strong hand and outstretched arm, and the actions of His chosen messenger, Moshe Rabeinu, Moses.

On Monday evening, around the world, we will gather with family and friends. We will listen intently as the youngest at the table recites the “four questions”, which is really one question, “Why is this night different from all other nights”, and four reasons why it is different. The leader will then guide his or her guests through the telling and retelling of the story of the Exodus, and then, after two of our 4 required cups of wine, we will eat a delicious meal, sing some songs, eat dessert and finally, at the end of the night, we will proclaim: Le Shana haBaa b’Yerushalayim, Next Year in Jerusalem.

My question today is: Do we really mean it?

I mean… If we mean it every year… I guess I am really asking: If we mean it; Next Year in Jerusalem; why are we still not in Jerusalem? Why do we remain in Arizona or New York, or Los Angeles, Montreal, Sydney or Paris?

Just yesterday, a friend and I were talking and we were wondering if the Province of British Columbia or the Dominion of Canada had to ask for or receive permission from the “Temporary Tenant” at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue NW to build the beautiful new buildings and neighborhoods in Vancouver that were introduced to us during their tremendous production of the Winter Games last month. If so, why did we not hear about it, and if not, why not? If Canada does not need permission from Mr. Osama, I mean Obama, why should Israel? We are sovereign nations. In fact, come to think of it, the world is full of sovereign nations that seem to be bossed around by this Country. Why is that?

This being the case, again, I ask: If we mean what we say, why are we still here?

You may recall that a few weeks ago, I recounted, quoted and showered British journalist Chris Roycroft-Davis and his piece called “WHY CAN'T THIS COUNTRY FOLLOW ISRAEL'S LEAD?” As is often the case, I received quite a bit of e-mail over the several days following publication of that Column, most positive, and one, from a Real Estate Developer in Hurst, Texas that I must share with you. Initially, I was going to share his name, address, phone number and every other way to reach him that he posted for all to see, but in reality, he just isn’t worth the bother. What he wrote, however, is. (Please note that he makes reference to a Jewish man in Los Angeles, whose name I have deleted and replaced with XXX).

From: Unnamed Reader in Hurst, Texas
Sent: Tuesday, March 02, 2010 9:06 AM
To: rabbiabrams@q.com
Subject: RE: A British Journalist's viewpoint...

I read your article with great interest. I support Israelis position and have always wanted Israel to pop them every time. But, I have to say I have dealt with several Jewish people in my business over the years and the experiences have been not good. Just this past year I settled a lawsuit with a XXXX XXXXX of L.A. I have never been so screwed. While this guy was screwing me he was praying several times a day. XXXXX would not say crap if his mouth was full of it but he would screw you out of everything you have and now regret it one bit. This may be the problem that causes the Jewish people to suffer so much… I have heard that the Jewish faith feel they can cheat everyone out of their possessions and not be sinning because it is just business and be forgiven the first of each year… I am not racist that is just a plain fact. I have had dealing with about 250 of them and I got took every time.

Is this “Public Opinion”? Are opinions like this reader’s popular to the point that the “Temporary Tenant” of Pennsylvania Avenue NW is more interested in where Israel builds Jewish housing than housing his own Citizenry?

If so, I must ask another question. An important question that each of us as Jews must take a moment to contemplate: If this “administration” is so concerned with Jewish housing in another country (Israel), what does he really feel about us taking up housing in this country? In short, I ask: Are we safe?

In Europe of the late 1920’s and 1930’s, we felt safe. Were we safe? Are we safe now?

At the end of the Seder, when we proclaim “Next Year in Jerusalem”, it is because we are commanded to return to Zion; to Jerusalem. Could the time be now? Could we do worse than Jerusalem? In the words of Sarah Palin: You betcha!

As March becomes April; the NCAA Basketball tournament heats up with new heroes born on late night television every weekend in an event called "March Madness", and I look at the activities of this past week and wonder if "March Madness" is really about the Basketball, or is the madness this March more about the rest of the world?

And, in this madness, where does Jerusalem sit? I believe that she sits waiting for us with open arms to golden walls. And, if you ask me further, I believe that G-d is ready once again to bring us from the bondage of “Galut”, of Diaspora, and to return us with a strong hand and outstretched arm to our freedom once again. To Eretz Zion, Yerushalayim.

When we sit with our families and friends next week and proclaim “Le Shana haBaa b’Yerushalayim”, let’s mean it. There is space enough for all of us. Whether Mr. Osama Obama gives us permission to build or not.

Hashata HaCha, This year we are here; LeShana b'Araa DYisrael, May we all be in the Land of Zion. Our land. Jerusalem of Gold awaits.

From the Emek in the Midbar, I Send you my love and blessings; Ahavah u'Vrachot...

--Rabbi Alan Abrams

A non-beating heart still beats...

2010-03-04T11:08:00.002-07:00

There are times when just as I am about to write this column for you, I receive something via e-mail, or enjoy (or not so much) a telephone conversation, and it is so profound, so meaningful, that it would be absolutely wrong of me to not share it with you here.

As many of you know, I do much work with an organization called "One Heart". We work with families of victims of terror attacks. The father in a family that I have become so very close to, sent me a letter that was recently published in Israel. I would be remiss were I to not share it with you.

2500 days without Tal.

Thursday, January 7th 2010, the 2500 Day without Tal.

The count of days is long, very long, too long. 2500 days that my Tal does not leave home. Not for shopping, not to the movies, nor does she return from the army or the university, not from a trip abroad. 2500 Days without Tal. Days without me worry for Tal.

357 weeks in which I did not see my daughter, I did not hear her voice, I did not laugh from a joke she told me or from one of her silly acts. I did not smell the scent, did not embrace her nor was I embraced by her. I did not spend even one afternoon together with her at a café or at a restaurant, or even just being together. I even did not receive a phone call nor a text message from Tal.

2500 days of "creativity". How could I, her father, preserve her memory in unique ways? How should I tell the world Tal’s story? Tal which lived such a short life but the wisdom she accumulated and the joy of life she shared gave so much hope and happiness to people she met.
208 months, in which every 5th of the month brings me to that Wednesday, March 5th 2003, the day my Tal boarded the bus in Haifa, the bus from which she it did not get off. I live the same nightmare I'd give anything not to experience. A nightmare of a parent searching for his daughter after a terror attack holding at every glimmer of hope even after entering the pathological institute in Tel Aviv. Then, unlike in fairy tales, as the clock hit midnight the doctor at the pathological Institute said "we have a positive identification of your daughter Tal which was killed at the terror attack”.

Six years, 10 months and two days is a long period of time. During such a period of time a baby already goes to second grade. Tal’s classmates finished their mandatory military service while other became combat pilots and are flying F-16 jets. Tal’s age group started its independent cycle of life while others are right before getting their master's degree. Medical student already began to cure his patients while my daughter lies in her grave in Haifa, and only the rose bush over her tomb is growing another cycle of roses, as life goes on!

2500 days and nights since I was forced over the fence to leave my routine life and start my life as a bereaved father, fighting a Don Quixote war at the wind mills of time, trying to fight forgetfulness, howl, and state my silent cry, I have a Daughter! And the world shall never forget my TAL!

I sit in Tal’s room and write from my heart in another desperate attempt to preserve my daughter’s memory. I found this 2500 day without Tal, a good reason to remind you, you busy people living your routine life about my daughter. And what would be on the 3000s day? When it will arrive? What will I be able to dig from the bottom of my soul to remind you then?

I sit it Tal’s room hearing in the background the breathing of my youngest daughter which was born four years and two months after Tal was killed. She already heard about her sister and recognizes Tal’s picture, approaching is also the recruitment day of my son, who will safe keep and protect him? I hope and pray they will realize and live their lives safely here in Israel for many years.

Ron Kehrmann the father of Tal (z”l) Dror and Mika.

http://www.tal-smile.com/.

I continue to believe, as does Ron Kehrmann, that as long as our loved ones' memories live on, so they will their hearts continue to beat.

From the Emek in the Midbar, I send you Ahavah, uV'rachot, Love and Blessings...

--Rabbi Alan Abrams

I'm just happy to be here. How about you?

2010-02-12T17:36:00.000-07:00

It doesn't seem logical or right that it was only a year ago, plus two weeks or so, that I received that fateful phone call from my dear friend Kelley in Los Angeles that got me thinking about "doing something". Doing anything to stand up to real life bullies. To set the record straight, I am not referring to the street bully who would wait on the corner of Rosewood and Fuller and take our lunch money, rather, the older and more "mature" bully who hides behind his religion or disability to attack another person. This cause celebre, if for only one or two written paragraphs, placed into a story about how my father (obm z"l) hated "hate" would become this column only a few weeks later. Time does fly.

On a scorching hot afternoon in August of 1976, I met my hero. It was not one of those hero meeting moments, with the anticipation and autographs and eventual let down. In fact, I just realized, thirty-three years after the fact, that LD was my hero in High School and would continue to be my hero. Leo isn't just my hero because he saved me from getthing thrown off the football team (on day one of Hell Week); but because Leo Davis stood for, and still stands for everything that we should all aspire to stand for. Leo stood large in the middle of our front lines, both on Defense and on Offense. With all of his weight, and with all of his size, in 1977, 1978, and 1979, Leo is remembered for the size of his heart. He played with it on the football field, and he gave it to everyone he came into contact with off the field.

Two weeks ago, while driving to Los Angeles to officiate and celebrate my father's two year memorial anniversary, I stopped before Shabbat at Cedars Sinai Medical Center and visited with Leo as he was recovering from a Triple Bypass performed the previous Wednesday. You can have all of your Batmans and Supermans. I'll take Davis.

"I'll take Davis" has a familiar ring to it as well... Back to the days of picking sides in a game of Whateverball, one side picked a player, and then the other side picked and back and forth until everyone was on a team. Usually. Some kids just never got picked, which, in retrospect was quite rude, but nobody ever wanted the short kid with red hair and braces. Sometimes, girls even got picked before him. Usually he would sit on the side and somehow get into the game, or not. He was just happy to be there.

As I davened at my old spot on the Bima in the Beit Midrash of my old Shul the other day, I felt somewhat like that red haired kid. I was just happy to be there. I find myself, however, in the vast minority these days. Most people that I see, just don't seem to be, and it is really a shame.

Leo, is just happy to be here.

Speaking with Kelley today, I know that Kelley too, is happy to be here. The kid who came from the cable company the other day to do his job at my new one bedroom condo, however, was not. For the almost two hours that he was here, all he did was talk to himself complaining how he had to work that day. Maybe if he had been just happy to be here, I might not have had to call the cable company later that day and ask to send another technician to finish the job that the kid never finished when he left to get a drill and never came back.

Pirke Avot, the Ethics of our Fathers teaches us that "he who is happy is the person who is happy with what he has." Two thousand years ago this was written, and it holds true today.

As we usher in another beautiful Shabbat in Emek haMidbar, the Valley of the Desert, I ask you to do what you can this Presidents' Day Weekend to just be happy to be here.

Shabbat Shalom, Ahavah u'Vrachot...

--R' Alan Abrams

Just when we think that we have seen it all...

2010-01-19T14:55:00.000-07:00

In my forty-eight years of life, I believe that I have experienced quite a number of interesting, if not exciting events. Things that would surprise many people, and even a few which might leave some in awe. In High School, while I was attempting to throw strikes to our catcher, Erez (EZ) Borowsky (later of Minnesota Twins fame), a real Major League Pitcher lived with my family, and I was able to spend late afternoons and evenings in the Dodgers' dugout and bullpen; At one point I spent time hanging out with mega stars in Cannes; Sitting on airplanes with the likes of Muhammad Ali, Pierre Eliot Trudeau and even Jack Kent Cooke (when he owned the Redskins). To me, these were just random events in my life, and looking back at these days, I am at times in awe myself. I am often asked if I feel that there had been opportunities to succeed through knowing these people, and that these opportunities were wasted by not engaging. Once upon a time, I might have contemplated that question, and may have even replied in the affirmative, but not today.

Today, I prefer to remember the more mundane experiences and wonder why I did not capitalize on them. Why did I not savor every minute that I had while swimming with my boys in the Hawaiian Pacific with giant sea turtles? Why did I spend most of my adult life trying to live the "American Dream" (which should really be called the American Nightmare) by keeping up with the Johnsons? Why was it important for me to drive a Mercedes-Benz and buy expensive shoes? Why did I prefer to play golf without my little son, because if I would take him with me, he would complain, and rightly so, about my smoking like a chimney. Today, I prefer to remember these failed experiences as a reminder of what not to do while continuing this wonderful journey called life.

As I write today, I recall that it was just a year ago that this Column came into being. As a tribute to my father, whose Marker we had just unveiled; as a burst of solidarity to friends who had been wronged in business by a Bible Thumping bigot of the 100th degree; and as a prayer for the "hope" that we were promised, once the new "Leader" took office. It appears now, a mere year later, that this manufactured hope has disappeared, and that the remaining hope is that this “Leader” will not end the world as we know it.

I remember how my father had no hates in his life, except for one, hate itself. I think about the number of people with whom I speak on a daily basis, and the hatred, disappointment and discontent that they bring to me to solve for them. I try as I might to listen quietly and offer them answers of which I am certain, I, at times, find myself wondering if life could get any more strange.

A few weeks ago, I answered the phone at my second job (a movie theatre) and the voice on the other side of the conversation actually asked me, with all sincerity, "Do you all show movies there?" We all laughed. It seems that just when we think that we have seen it all, we are hit by more of what I like to call a veritable lack of the most apparently expensive commodity around: Attention.

For many, inability to pay attention is a disease. Medically treatable and more than ninety-nine percent of the time, curable, I ask about the rest of us. Why do we find attention to be so expensive, that we are unwilling to pay it?

It is attention, or lack thereof, that causes communication breakdowns; that confuse us and that and destroys relationships, that otherwise could be healthy. Do we not pay attention because we are disinterested in the other person, or what he or she has to say, or do we not pay attention because we are so excited about saying what it is that we want to say; about hearing our own voice, that anything said before is unimportant? Why do we ask for advice, only to do whatever we want to do anyway?

In visiting several evening based networking groups over the past year, I have found that there is a whole society of people who pay so very little attention to real life, and to what is really happening around them, that they get caught up in a dream. The get rich fast dream. All they must do to achieve success and happiness is write a check for $99 and then convince everyone that they know to buy fruit juice or vitamins or a website that sends greeting cards. Then, once their friends are convinced that this is the way to instant riches, they convince these friends to write them a check for $99. And so it goes.

Many Christians wear a bracelet or Tee-Shirt that asks: WWJD? What would Jesus do? In truth, they are asking, WSID. What should I do. All of us, regardless of religion, regardless of race ask our friends: What should I do about this new job? What should I do about this, or that? Should I stay married if I don't love my husband?

In short, G-d put us on this earth with a certain level of intelligence. Believe it or not, even if we don't all use it, we still, for the most part possess it. This intelligence comes with an uncanny ability to make decisions, and many times, the unique ability to make the exact wrong decision.

This, my friends is where faith plays its role. Whether we ask WWJD? WWM(Moses)D? WSID? The simple truth is in the word: attention. If we had paid the attention required to see all sides of the question equally, then, our answer is simple: If we think that this is something that we should NOT do, we should not do it. The old story asks the question about Kashrut, the Jewish dietary laws. If you have to ask the Rabbi if the item is Kosher, it isn't. If you have to ask the Rolls Royce dealer how much this car costs, you cannot afford it.

I am often inspired by a famous Hebrew quote attributed to Rabbi Nachman of Bratslav, which states: "The whole world is a narrow bridge, but the main thing is not to fear." This tells us that our belief in G-d and faith in His love for us and us for Him should be enough to cross the bridge with no fear. Many times it is enough, but sadly, many do not possess this faith and therefore, retain fear and pay little attention to much else.

The Parsha that we just read on Shabbat, Vaeira, speaks of Moses' conversation with G-d and G-d's instruction that Moses go to Egypt and tell Pharoah to "Let my people go." But Moses retorted, "The Israelites would not listen to me; how then should Pharaoh heed me, a man of impeded speech!". G-d then repeated his commandment, but rather than use the word "go" to Egypt, He said "come" to Egypt, indicating that G-d would be with him, at his side. (Ex 4:10-12).

This is the faith that we must all have right now. This is the faith with which we must all take a moment and pay attention. With it, we can move mountains. Knowing that G-d is with us each and every moment of each and every day, just when we think that we have seen it all, G-d can work in the most mysterious of ways and bring us the comfort and happiness that we all need so very much these days.

This is the faith that we must have in our hearts when we look toward our Moledet. Our Birthright; our home, far over two seas. The small stretch of land barely the size of New Jersey, which waits for us with open and loving armsh. With an open and loving voice she calls to us and reminds us that she is there, but by the grace of G-d and that she is home to one and all of us, as granted us by our Creator to Abraham, Isaac and Jacob; to Sara, Rebecca, Rachel and Leah, for in reality, This land is your land. This land is my land. This is the land that needs us, and this is the land that we need. We must not forsake her, nor may we forget her, nor may we not protect her. This is the land that was made for you and me. Let us pay the attention that we must to go to her, and to be home, where G-d wants for us to be.

This week, from the not so Sunny Southern California, where it most certainly does rain, I send you Ahavah u'Vrachot. Love and Peace and wishes for a wonderful week.

--Rabbi Alan Abrams

A Letter to a Friend and Brother in The Shomron (Samaria, West Bank, Israel)

2009-12-01T01:22:00.001-07:00

This week's column will be a little different. I decided to publish a letter that I just sent to my dear friend David HaIvri, and Ex-Pat who made Aliyah to Israel and lives in the Shomron, in what is sometimes referred to as the West Bank.
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Dear David... Relative to Manhigut (1) , please stick with us. We are making huge progress, and we need YOU.

I am very sorry that we did not meet while I was home this Spring. Hopefully I will have a chance to come in the Summer, and we can sit for an hour or three.

Whether or not you are aware of my situation, sufficed it to say at this moment, that I am alive today due to G-d's Rachmanut (2a) , favor and belief in me to do what I need to do.

It is my sincere opinion that this means to form a Kehillah (2b) here that will teach others how important Israel is to all of us, and why it is our DUTY to come home to Eretz Yisrael.

We are not (2c) Charedim , and many in my (2b) Kehillah are not even (2c) "Dati" or "Masorti", but what they all agree upon is that Israel belongs to US, as given to (2d) Avraham Avinu and to (2e) AM YISRAEL.

(3) OD LO AVDA TIKVATEINU, David. OD LO AVDA TIKVATEINU. LEHIYOT AM CHOFSHI b'ARTZEINU. And we will be. Why? Because it is G-d's will.

As I sit and write this, tears form in my forty-eight year old eyes. Tears of longing to be home, and of love for our (2a) Moledet. And, in the knowledge that if we can all just live together, as (2e) AM B'NEI YISRAEL, without the labels (Reform, Conservative, etc.), as (3) AM CHOFSHI b'ARTZEINU, we will not only rise, but we will rise with haShem leading us to the ultimate netzachon, the victory of Shalom al Yisrael.

(2f) Al haNissim, Achi. Its all in the miracles from haShem, my brother. When we BELIEVE, nobody can stop us.

I can tell you about the people that come to my Shul to daven; many of them had not been IN a Synagogue in YEARS, and believe it or not, some had never been in a Synagogue. In fact, a few weeks ago, at my Wednesday night Torah Study, at least six or seven EVANGELICAL CHRISTIANS came to study (2g) Parashat Bereshit. When we were done, every one of them told me how they were so confused now, but at the same time, very clear in their comprehension. In short, they were confused how it is now so clear that EVERYTHING that they had learned relative to teh man that they call Yeshu, is now (to them) absolutely untrue, and could never BE true. Even they understand why we must rise in strength and unity. And, we must.

The time, my dear friend and brother, the time for the old BS to end is now. We are JEWS. Does it matter if we are Ashkenazim or Sefaradim? Orthodox or Reform? Really? Did the Nazis care? Does Hamas care? Why should WE? We are Jews. We are the Chosen People. To quote Manhigut Yehudit, The Jewish Leadership Movement, "A Jewish state must be absolutely faithful to the Land of Israel -- the Land that was promised in its Biblical borders to the Fathers of the Nation by the Creator of the world -- and includes the understanding of the positive connection between the Land and the ability of the Nation of Israel to fulfill its earthly goals."
You, my friend are very fortunate. Each day when you rise and look outdoors, the street signs are in Hebrew. The store windows are too. In your ears, you are so very blessed to be able to hear our wonderful holy language. We want to join you. We NEED to join you, and we WILL. But to join you, we need your support as you need ours.

WE MUST WORK TOGETHER, no less and not much differently than we did in the Twenties, and Thirties, and 40's and so forth. We are ALL (2e) B'nei Yaacov; B'nei Yisrael. We need to get our proverbial heads out our backsides and see what is truly important: (3) Lehiyot Am Chofshi b'Arteinu, Eretz Tzion, Yerushalayim.

May G-d continue to Bless you and Keep you, my dear friend. May He shine his Grace upon you; and May He grant you Peace. For you and for All Yisrael.

Your brother in Peace and in Defense of our Moledet...

--AA
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KEY as shown above in small notated numerals:

(1) Manhigut Yehudit is the Jewish Leadership Movement under the direction of MK Moshe Feiglin.  Many see Mr. Feiglin and the Jewish Leadership Movement as the future of the State of Israel.

(2a) Rachmanut: Mercy. Moledet: Birthright. (2b) Kehillah: Congregation or Community (2c) Speaks to the three levels of Observance: Charedi - Ultra-Orthadox; Dati - Orthodox; Masorti - Comfortably Observant.   (2d) Avraham Avinu: Abraham, The first Jew; Married to Sara; Father to Isaac. (2e) B'Nei: Sons of/ Descendents of; Yaacov: Jacob; Yisrael: Israel. Am Yisrael; Teh Nation of Israel or People of Israel. (2f) Al haNissim is a prayer or series of prayers that thank G-d for certain miracles that He has brought to us over the lengths of history. (2g) Parashat Bereshit: The portion of Torah that describes Creation.

(3) Hatikvah (Hebrew: הַתִּקְוָה‎, lit. The Hope) is the national anthem of Israel. The anthem was written by Naphtali Herz Imber, a secular Galician Jew from Zolochiv (today in Lviv Oblast),[1] who moved to the Land of Israel in the early 1880s. The anthem's theme revolves around the nearly 2000-year-old hope of the Jewish people to be a free and sovereign people in the Land of Israel, a national dream that would eventually be realized with the founding of the modern State of Israel in 1948. (Courtesy Wikipedia)

Hebrew                           Transliteration                               English translation

כֹּל עוֹד בַּלֵּבָב פְּנִימָה            Kol ‘od balleivav penimah           As long as in the heart, within,

נֶפֶשׁ יְהוּדִי הוֹמִיָּה,               Nefesh yehudi homiyah,                 A Jewish soul still yearns,

וּלְפַאֲתֵי מִזְרָח, קָדִימָה,   Ul(e)fa’atei mizrach kadimah,   And onward, towards the ends of the east,
עַיִן לְצִיּוֹן צוֹפִיָּה;              Ayin letziyon tzofiyah;                     An eye still gazes toward Zion;

עוֹד לֹא אָבְדָה תִּקְוָתֵנוּ,     ‘Od lo avdah tikvateinu,             Our hope is not yet lost,

הַתִּקְוָה בַּת שְׁנוֹת אַלְפַּיִם,       Hatikvah bat shnot alpayim,   The hope of two thousand years,

לִהְיוֹת עַם חָפְשִׁי בְּאַרְצֵנוּ,      Lihyot ‘am chofshi be’artzeinu,   To be a free people in our land,

אֶרֶץ צִיּוֹן וִירוּשָׁלַיִם.          Eretz-tziyon vy(e)rushalayim.          The land of Zion and Jerusalem.
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For this week, I leave you with the hope that you too will visit our Internet Home at http://www.emek-az.org/, and of you are able to even help us to help others even in small amounts, we will be ever so grateful. Your tax deductible contributions may be sent via PayPal to emek@q.com or by visiting our Support Page at http://apps.facebook.com/causes/401503.

From the Emek in our Midbar that we call Arizona, I wish you Ahava u'Vrachot; Love and Blessings...

Rabbi Alan Abrams

One Nation Under G-d. Really?

2009-11-15T23:13:00.001-07:00

One Nation Under G-d. Really?

Every day, millions of America's schoolchildren, be they Christian, Jewish, or agnostic rise from their chairs and recite the Pledge of Allegiance to the flag of the United States of America, and to the Republic for which it stands. One Nation Under G-d.

This week, I would like to examine the definition of "One Nation Under G-d", and explore what it really means to be a "Nation". And, what it means to be a "Nation under G-d".

Two weeks ago, we read Parshat Lekh Lekha, from the Book of Genesis, Chapter 12. In the second line of this reading, G-d promises Abram that his descendants will be a Great Nation (And I will make of thee a great nation, and I will bless thee, and make thy name great; and thou shalt be a blessing). To me, this means that G-d has promised Abram and his descendants that they will be a "Nation under G-d". And, if we think about it, are we not all descendants of Abram? We certainly are as Jews. Those who believe in different theology, worshiping as Christians or Catholic Christians or Protestants or Mormons acknowledge this connection, and acknowledge as well that G-d, and only G-d created Heaven and Earth and all their hosts thereof.

Let's slow down for a moment and re-read: Just so I am clear with my own writing, IF we believe in G-d; and IF we believe that G-d created the Heavens and Earth and, basically, everything; and IF we believe that Abram was a person (the same guy who married Sarai/Sara, and later had his name changed to Abraham, had a couple sons, and so forth), then, we must believe that G-d promised to make Abram and his descendants A GREAT NATION; and, in turn, that nation would be a Nation Under G-d; and, if this is all the case, then are we all not One Nation Under G-d?

A few weeks ago, my friend, the enthralling author, Stephen Lewis (The Palestine Exchange, AuthorHouse (2007) ISBN-13: 978-1434334725) invited me to attend an event at Phoenix Symphony Hall called " A Night to Honour Israel". All I needed to hear that this was a night to honour Israel, and I was on-board. When he told me that the amazing Dennis Prager was to be the Key Note Speaker, I asked Steve how many extra tickets he could get me!

Upon my arrival, I was greeted by a massive demonstration of alleged Christians, who carried signs depicting Israel as bad guys, of course; Christians who believe in Israel's right to exist, as bad guys; and of course, the obvious attempts to make us believe that Missile wielding terrorists who call themselves Palestinians, as the "good guys", as abused as they have been by Christian Americans. I find it strange that these yahoos outside claiming all of this hatred in the name of Christianity, while all the while, the real Christians were inside the building, helping make a case for, and supporting our little Country.

Inside, an air of almost electricity was collecting, and inside the amazing Symphony Hall, the evening absolutely rocked. My Colleague Rabbi Arthur Lavinsky helped welcome the audience and blew a masterful set of Tekiyot on his Shofar; World Class Christian singer/performer Rhoda Schultz held us all at bay with her angelic, yet powerful voice and Pastor Eddie Paul Morris reminded us time and again that we are all children of G-d, as further stated in Parshat Lekh Lecha, Genesis 12 continues, "And I will bless them that bless thee, and curse him that curseth thee: and in thee shall all families of the earth be blessed." No matter our Theology, we all agree that we need to remember that we are all... One Nation Under G-d.

The evening continued with Holocaust survivor Helen Handler returning us to the worst time in known history with her recollections, followed by the wonderfully talented actress and voice/accent aficionado Susan Sandager who performed as the Dutch Christian Heroine of WWII, Cori tenBoom. And then, the real fun started.

The brilliant, popular and exuberant Dennis Prager carried us the rest of the way. Dennis' sheer knowledge of almost anything political, and almost everything Jewish, combined with the single most charismatic personality that I have ever experienced brought the filled room to its feet with his admission of his love for Israel, and his love for brotherhood and his love for peace. Thank you Dennis. You were, as usual, brilliant, enlightening, spiritual and educational. Rav Todot.

My next question brings us to understanding borders. Does a Nation have borders, or is a Nation merely the people who exist within it?

Parshat Lekh Lekha further reads: And Abram passed through the land unto the place of Sichem, unto the plain of Moreh. And the Canaanite was then in the land. And the L-RD appeared unto Abram, and said, Unto thy seed will I give this land: and there builded he an altar unto the L-RD, who appeared unto him. And he removed from thence unto a mountain on the east of Bethel, and pitched his tent, having Bethel on the west, and Hai on the east: and there he builded an altar unto the L-RD, and called upon the name of the L-RD.

It is for this land that we live. It is for this land that we pray. And it is for this land that we fight. We live and pray and fight for this land from all corners of this great earth that G-d created; AND, we do so as... One Nation Under G-d.

Manhigut Yehudit, The Jewish Leadership Movement, led by Moshe Feiglin supports the above, and actually holds to the platform that "A Jewish state must be absolutely faithful to the Land of Israel -- the Land that was promised in its Biblical borders to the Fathers of the Nation by the Creator of the world -- and includes the understanding of the positive connection between the Land and the ability of the Nation of Israel to fulfill its earthly goals."

We, as One Nation Under G-d, must support this platform. We must support it theologically, physically and financially as we are able. We must understand and realize that Moshe Feiglin and Manhigut Yehudit are not a group of fanatics dancing to their own beat, rather, they are US. Moshe is you and Moshe is me. Moshe is my brother and he is your cousin. He is your uncles best friend and the bus driver that drove you to work last week. Moshe believes that we are all One Nation Under G-d, and that the land promised to us by, and given to us by our One Creator, was, is and will always be our land.

This is easier said than done, many say. I ask why? Why should this be a difficult task if we are truly one? If we are truly one, why is it that we fight, not just against each other, but between ourselves? Why is it that Orthodox Shuls refuse to recognize Reform Temples? Why must Conservative Synagogues feel the need to compete for the affections of anyone with a large checkbook, with more and more lenient and liberal interpretation of Halakha (Jewish Law) from week to week? Why must Reform Temples, with all of their wonderful intentions to renew Yiddishkeit and bring Judaism to families, feel that a competition exists for the wealthiest families?

The answer is simple and it is also very sad. The reason that everyone feels the need to fight is because this competition, in every industry and profession was created by the "American Dream". The dream that in reality is, but a fantasy, brought on by an evil sister of Jealousy. Her name is Greed.

G-d commands us to not worship other Gods. We do, though. She is green (envy) and comes with numbers like 1, 5, 10, 20, 50 and 100 in each of her four corners. We worship her because this "American Dream" has told us that we so need her. And more of her, and more and more. Like a street drug, we have become addicted to her and her power. And unfortunately, as all addictions and diseases, she has infected even Houses of G-d.

Before I entered the Rabbinate, I once asked a cynical Rabbi friend of mine how it is that many Synagogues go so far against Halakha in the name of donations, he answered me accordingly: He who has the gold, makes the rules, he said. I wanted to cry. I asked myself then: What has happened to us?

In the Siddur, in our daily prayers, and upon rising and going to sleep, four times daily, we are told what G-d expects from us. V'Ahavta et haShem Elokeikha... "And thou shalt love the L-RD thy G-d with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might. And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart: And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up."

What, I ask, could be so difficult to, not just understand, but perform? How have we, collective as One Nation Under G-d forgotten the most simple of all instructions? I especially ask many in the position of making certain that we say these words daily: Why? How did we forget what we are all supposed to stand for? When did the messenger become more important than the message? We are, after all, One Nation Under G-d. Are we not?

Emek haMidbar was built with this exact purpose. To bring Judaica to those who otherwise could not afford to belong. To bring Judaica to the 75-85% of our Community who are unaffiliated. Not to steal Congregants away from other Synagogues, where they have found spirituality, religiosity, friendship and brother (sister)hood. Even though I acknowledge that this "competition" exists, I do not, nor will I buy into it.

My friends and Colleagues, Rabbis Michael Wasserman and Elana Kanter of The New Shul in Scottsdale, believe in the philosophy that selling membership into a community turns Congregants into Customers. I could not agree more.

If our Kindergartners, our third, fifth and ninth graders can remember to say it every day, we absolutely must find a way to live it every day. We are all One Nation Under G-d. Maybe if we do, we will all be able to get along better. To better support each other as opposed to using Lashon haRa in daily life; to utilize our tools to bring more Torah to more people, affiliated and unaffiliated alike; and in the end, be better people.

From the Emek in haMidbar of Scottsdale, Arizona, I wish you, Ahavah u'Vrachot.
Peace and love...

Shavuah Tov.

--Rabbi Alan Abrams

It's all about the "Do-Over"

2009-10-09T07:27:00.022-07:00

If I were a betting man, I think that the Detroit Tigers are wishing about now that they could get a Do-Over. I believe that they would call their "Do-Over" September and October. Unfortunately for them, like the rest of us, they will be watching the Twins get beat up by the Yankees. Fortunately, their "Do-Over" is just a game. Our "Do-Overs", are not.

Today is Hoshana Raba, or the "Big Hoshana". When we shake the Lulav for the last time of the year during the harvest holiday of Sukkot, and prepare for Simchat Torah, the Celebration of Torah, which begins tomorrow night, we remember that Hoshana Raba is also the final chance that we have at that big book of life that we have all be pushing to get into and be sealed within for the past few weeks. Hopefully, we get our Do-Over.

We apologized and continue to apologize for all that we have done that may have hurt others or ourselves during the past year, and look forward to doing "better" in the coming year. The big question is: Will we?

Will the man in the brown shirt continue to yell at his girlfriend in public? Will he save his outbursts for private venues, or will he learn to better communicate? Will the gentle man who once left the East Coast of the United States to fight for Israel in Lebanon come to terms with the truth that he is indeed a Hero of Israel, a great father and a "mensch"? Will he value himself again and begin to take better care of himself? Will the mother who prefers the company of her married boss to that of her children catch herself in time, this time?

We all have done things that prevent us from becoming better. Better Jews; better Christians; better fathers, mothers, husbands, wives, doctors, Rabbis; things that would in short, make us better people.

Why is it then, that with all of the "Do-Overs" that we ask for and are not offered; all the complaining that we do that "life is not fair"; all the loopholes that we seek, we seem to tend to take for granted the biggest and most important "Do-Over" that we could, and do, pray for? The "Do-Over" that G-d gives us when the Shofar is blown on Yom Kippur night.

We seem to take these "Do-Overs" for granted an continue to live with the "But First Syndrome". We will all say at some point: I'd really like to start working out, but first I need to... I really need to call my Uncle Moishe and apologize for being rude to him, but first I have to... I really should attend Synagogue this Shabbat, but first...

Does G-d listen to us on Yom Kippur and say: I really need to forgive these people, but first...?

I read this morning a tale written by a religious man, who penned about his recent experience near the Kotel in Jerusalem earlier today. He wrote that he was somehow acosted and detained by Israeli Police for "calling upon people" to ascend to the Temple Mount, which, could have incited serious objection from our Moslem cousins on the mount. Rather than simply forward us readers this news, instead he used his forum to comment negatively toward the very people who carry the job of protecting our dear little Country. Rather than walking to the Wall with thousands of others, he preferred to continue to incite, and in fact, asked others to help him to do so via a very public forum. Will this man, a religious and level headed man find a way to reconcile with himself? We he use his "Do-Over"?

As we begin another beautiful cycle of reading the Torah from beginning to end, starting at Bereishit (Genesis) from literally the beginning and to the end of Deuteronomy, Dvarim with the final Parsha, v'Zot haBracha, and This is the Blessing", let us all try to use this "Do-Over" for good and to not take it for granted. May we use it to better ourselves and to help those around us to better themselves. May we be kinder and more gentle not with just each other, but with ourselves.

From the Emek in the Midbar, the Valley in the Desert, I wish you all a Shabbat Shalom, v'Chag Sameach. A peaceful and restful Shabbat and joyous holiday.

Ahavah v'Vrachot, Love and Blessings...

Rabbi Alan Abrams

A Few of My Favorite Things - Yom Kippur Drasha and More...

2009-10-02T07:47:00.009-07:00

As we ready ourselves to celebrate Sukkot, I would like to begin this week's column with my talk from Yom Kippur, this past Monday, and then tell you a little about how Yom Kippur went at Emek haMidbar, the new Community that I have been asked to build.

September 28, 2009

הי בתשרי, התש"ע

יום כפור

Yom Kippur 5770

These are a Few of My Favorite Things

Golf on an early morning, just early enough to smell the newly mowed fairways, but late enough that the dew has evaporated; the smell of a ballpark during batting practice, before all the fans get there; the sound of the crack of each ball being whacked toward the outfield, the sound of its speed and the thump it makes against a lone wall in an empty stadium.

Parshiot (The weekly Torah Portions of) Bereishit, Noach, VaYetzeh, Yitro, Bo and others; Chanting Haftarot; a child being called to the Torah for the first time; a baby’s first wail. Watching the sun rise against the Kotel, and set over the Mediterranean, while sitting on the Tayelet at Gordon Beach in Tel Aviv. The sound of Shofar; the mumbling of silent davening, each one of us at our own tempo, rhythm, pace, and melodies.

Most of all, though, I think that my favorite thing to see and to hear, is watching the faces of my students when we take the Sefer Torah out of the Ark; and seeing their excitement when they come to Kabbalat Shabbat on Friday afternoon.

Today, Yom Kippur, is a day to reflect on all of these, and more. A day to sit back and listen to the Chazzanut, to the sounds of prayer and to introspectively remember, atone, accept and forgive.

A well known scholar in Tel Aviv, who goes by the pen name of IsraelSeen recently referred to Yom Kippur as such. He said: Yom Kippur means the “day of atonement, or rather the day of At-One-Ment. It is a day that culminates the inner-work that we Jews are asked to do especially intensively since Rosh HaShana, the “New Year” according to the Jewish calendar that is marked by the Moon cycles with some adjustment so it coincides closely with the solar calendar."

Actually, to be more precise it is from Tisha B’Av, the day when we fast and remember the destructions of the Temple past and all of the other tragedies that have befallen on us as a nation. It is from this moment that we search for the part of us that inspires forgiveness and substitutes the darkness within our souls, for the light that we are and have always been in spite of the forgetfulness of daily life.

As Einstein once said, darkness does not come from G-d but from an absence of light. For this, my friends is the world that we inherited, in much better shape than we find it now, and it is this world that we are asked by G-d to repair.

The Desiderata, a late 1700’s poem written by an unknown poet speaks to us even two hundred and thirty years later reminding us to be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees & the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with G-d, whatever you conceive Him to be, and whatever your labors & aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul. With all its sham, drudgery & broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world.

It is on us, Chaverai to remember these things today, and to act on them tomorrow. To ask G-d for forgiveness today, and begin living a better life, tomorrow; to say Modeh Ani Lefaneicha when we arise each day and to truly thank G-d for our presence, each and every day. To make the best use of our time, to strive for happiness through Torah, through Avodah, service to haShem, and through G’milut Chasadim, the random acts of loving kindness that we all have within us to perform.

It today’s Torah portion we just read that after his sons Nadav and Avihu had died as punishment for their improper service, Aharon was told to enter the Holy of the Holies only on Yom Kippur, at which time atonement was to be made for the sins of the community (including the Priesthood) and the Sanctuary was cleansed because it might have been entered by those who were ritually unclean. On Yom Kippur, the Kohein Godol (High Priest), dressed in white garments rather than gold ones, offered all the sacrifices.

The ritual included the casting of incense upon coal taken from the Altar, and the sacrificing of one of two male goats provided by the people for their offering. The commandment was given to us to observe Yom Kippur as a most solemn Shabbat (the Shabbat of Shabbatot), to fast and to repent for our misdeeds.

We read about the laws forbidding the eating of meat of an animal which wasn't ritually slaughtered and the forbidden intake of blood; and we read about High Moral Conduct. We continue to be reminded that Hashem expects of us a high level of moral conduct; thus, adultery and illicit marriages were prohibited, with the Torah citing examples of nations destroyed for immoral behavior.

This afternoon, during Mincha, we will learn again the Story of Jonah and what was asked of him by G-d. We will remember that we may be able to run from ourselves and our actions, but that we cannot hide from G-d. This, my friends, is not, in my opinion, meant to be a threat by G-d, nor do I believe that it is a warning, per se. I believe this to be a reminder to us that G-d is everywhere. He is above us and below us; to our right and to our left; in front of us and behind us. In every sense. G-d is with us on High and in our lowest moments; His angels sit upon our shoulders and watch over us.

Today, we promise G-d that from now, we will be the Best that We Can Be. We will strive for high moral ground, and we will love our neighbors as ourselves; We will cease from all forms of Lashon haRa, and help to make this World a better place; We will look to G- d for strength, while continuing to praise His holy name. We will love Him b’chol levaveinu, with all our hearts, u’bchol Nafsheinu, with all of our souls, u’bchol Moadeinu, and with all of our strength. We will take these words to heart and teach them diligently to our children. For as by design, our children are our future.

Yehi Ratzon Milfaneicha, haShem Elokeinu, v’Elokei Avoteinu, Sheh Tichadesh Aleinu Shana Tovah u’Metukah; G’Mar Chatima Tovah; u’Chol masheh tov b’Maaseinu. May it be your Will, O’ G-d, and G-d of our ancestors, that you will bless us with a good and a sweet year; that we will be inscribed into your Book of Life for yet another year; and that you will bring us the peace and solace for all things good this coming year.
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During Mincha, the afternoon service, my first born seventeen year old twin son joined me on the Bima. His helping me to lead our congregation was not planned. Zac is an above average Hebrew reader, but not fluent; he has a very nice singing voice, but not that of a performer in musical theatre, or in the Chazzanut, but this day was different. Very different.

When Zac joined me on the Bima, his reading, pronounciation, inflections and Chazzanut were not only perfect, but as we proceeded with Mincha, the afternoon service and into Neila, the closing service of Yom Kippur, our voices became as one. When I paused, he paused. When I started, he started. When my nusachim (melodies) changed, so did his. We were literally one voice. One voice so directly connected to G-d that by the end of the service, and blowing of the Shofar signaling the end of the holiday and the end of the fast, we were both in tears. Tears of happiness as well as pride and elation. Bar none, this Yom Kippur was the singlemost incredibly spiritual experience of my Rabbinical Career, if not my life.

As we move now to Sukkot, our "Season of Joy", we are within a week of celebrating our finishing to read the Torah, and a new beginning to the old, but very much alive book. Next Saturday night, we will finish reading the book of Devarim (Deuteronomy), and begin Genesis from, well, the beginning. It is this continual reading, telling and studying that keeps Torah alive in all of us. Jews and non-Jews alike. A friend said to me just last night that the same G-d that lives in me, lives in him. He is Catholic. Isn't it nice to have friends who share this belief?

Shorts

Word came from Israel this morning that a video was made on September 14, just two weeks ago, in which Gilad Shalit speaks to the world, PM Netanyahu and his parents. Gilad appears in good health and albeit, maybe tired and thin, he does appear to be healthy. This video, in Hebrew, may be found by clicking on this link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bqiT_xvUM2Y&feature=player_embedded.

A wonderful organization by the name of 6M for 6M is raising $6,000,000 to make a film called An Unbroken Chain based on a book by the same name by Dr. Henry Oertelt. Through his lectures and book, Oertelt’s story has been used in middle schools, high schools and colleges to educate students on the Holocaust and hate issues for over 40 years. To find out more please visit http://6mfor6m.org/.

Congregation Kehillat Emek haMidbar continues to seek a home in North Phoenix/Scottsdale. Should you come across anyone in the area that works in commercial real estate, leases, property management that might like to help a brand new Synagogue, please write to: emek@q.com.

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From the Emek (Valley) in the Midbar (Desert), I wish you a very restful Shabbat Shalom, and Chag Sameach. May you enjoy your Sukkot holiday with an abundance of happiness.

B'ahava u'Vrachot...

With love and blessings for a restful Shabbat Shalom and a wonderful Sukkot, filled with an abundance of happiness, I wish for you all that you wish for yourself, and G-d's blessing.

--Rabbi Alan Abrams

On This Rosh HaShana, We look to our Moledet...

2009-09-26T10:27:00.025-07:00

As we move within twenty four hours of Kol Nidre and Yom Kippur, 5770, I wish to share my words delivered on the Second day of Rosh HaShana.

September 20, 2009 - הב' בתשרי, תש"ע ראש השנה ב

On the fifth of the month of Iyar, in the Jewish year 5708, on the day in which the British Mandate over a Palestine expired, the Jewish People's Council gathered at the Tel Aviv Museum, and approved the following proclamation, declaring the establishment of the State of Israel. Our nation was founded on principles of Torah and Justice; Peace and Ahavat Chesed, the Love of kindness. On that day, David ben Gurion read the Proclamation of Independence which began with the words: ERETZ-ISRAEL was the birthplace of the Jewish people. Here their spiritual, religious and political identity was shaped. Here they first attained to statehood, created cultural values of national and universal significance and gave to the world the eternal Book of Books.

On Shabbat Shuva, we will read about the last address of Moshe Rabeinu.. Moses addresses Am Yisrael for the last time before the people leave for our Promised Land. Forbidden to enter the Land of Israel, Moses only is able to watch from afar and becomes probably the first of many Giborei Yisrael; heroes of Israel.

On June 7, 1985, in The Carmel Hospital, Ron and Orly Kehrman welcomed into the world their first child; a girl named Tal.

As Tal grew up, she developed an uncanny love for all of G-d’s creatures, especially cats, and not only befriended a few, but brought a few home to Ron, Orly and her little brother Dror. At the age of five, Tal began to collect camels. Stuffed camels, pictures of camels, a clock that looked like a camel, and even a sign in her room declaring “Camel Crossing Here”.

She was an incredibly friendly girl. She had a lot of friends from many different streams of life. She was sensitive to others’ feelings, and when her friends say that when she saw somebody hurt, she took special consideration in supporting and encouraging him. Because she was so friendly, she was the one who made a connection between individual friends and society. In her world of friends, there were a lot of new immigrants. Tal was a very sensitive teenager and did everything she could to avoid hurting a weaker person’s feelings. Tal loved to read both in English and in Hebrew. In addition to her appreciation of literature, she loved to watch the science and music channels. She knew all the words to numerous songs. If one picked any random song she surely knew all the words, both in English and in Hebrew. While in 11th grade, a month after the Twin Towers Terrorist attack, Tal was sent to represent “Ironi Hey School” in a delegation to Boston from the city of Haifa. She was chosen, because of her outstanding ability to connect with others.

On March 5, 2003, Tal and her friend Liz were in downtown Haifa to buy some materials for the end of school celebrations. On that day, after school she met up her friend to plan end of the school year events. They both went downtown to buy some things for this occasion. While downtown, they got a call from some other friends to come up to the Carmel. And so, as usual, Tal and Liz and around thirteen other Israelis sat comfortably on bus number 37, looking forward to graduation, the Army and the life that they had always wanted, and of which they have dreamt for years. There was only one problem that day, on bus #37. A Hamas terrorist has also boarded the bus and on Moriah Boulevard, he self detonated and seventeen people were murdered. Tal and Liz among them. Tal died just three months before her 18th birthday. Tal was, by all accounts, definitions and meanings, a Hero of Israel. Not in her death, rather, in her life. In the way that she lived her extraordinary, amazing, yet far too short life.

A truer example of Am Yisrael could not be found anywhere, in any annals of time, nor history. For the memory of Tal and other children like her, I pray daily, and through organizations like Lev Ecahd, One Heart, her memory lives on.

A baby boy named Gilad was born to Aviva and Noam Shalit on 28 August 1986 in Nahariyah. At age eleven, he wrote a story called "When the Fish and the Shark First Met", an engaging story in which a small fish and shark are able to resolve their familie's differences and live together in peace.

Early on Sunday morning, 25 June 2006, just two months short of his twentieth birthday, Gilad Shalit was captured by Terrorist Soldiers who surprise-attacked an Israeli army post on the Israeli side of the southern Gaza Strip border after crossing through an underground tunnel near the Kerem Shalom border, and has been held hostage in the Gaza Strip by Hamas since.
Shalit, a soldier of the IDF's Armor Corps, recently spent his 23rd birthday in captivity. Gilad is believed to be alive, however, Hamas authorities have refused requests from the allow visits by the International Red Cross to visit him, or otherwise confirm his health and welfare status. Several human rights organizations have stated that the terms and conditions of Shalit's detention are contrary to international humanitarian law. In exchange for his release, Hamas is demanding the release of over 1,000 terrorists held in Israel.

Manhigut Yehudit, The Jewish Leadership Movement, led by the popular Moshe Feiglin says it best when they state that: A Jewish state must be absolutely faithful to the Land of Israel -- the Land that was promised in its Biblical borders to the Fathers of the Nation by the Creator of the world -- and includes the understanding of the positive connection between the Land and the ability of the Nation of Israel to fulfill its earthly goals.

The Likud Party has unilaterally and correctly, I might add, reminded World Leaders, including the current resident at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue that our nation, that Israel is a Sovereign State. As is Canada, Mexico, France, Germany...

I must ask - When last did the United States last tell Canada to split their Dominion in two and hand it to Terrorist Forces? When did Germany last tell France what to do? 1942? 1943? Was Germany not then governed by the Terrorist of all Terrorists?

And so, I ask the current resident of 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue this question: Since when, Sir, is it your right, since when were you granted permission by Am Yisrael to tell us what to do with OUR LAND? With the land that was given to us by Our Creator; by He who took us from Egypt with a Long arm, and Outstretched Hand?

When Sir, were your children forced into Bomb Shelters to escape missiles fired from elementary schools by masked animals hiding behind toddlers and infants? When was the last time, Mr. Resident of 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, that you sent your daughter off to school never to see her return? When, Sir, was your Country facing destruction on a daily basis?

Why, Sir, does it appear to your citizenry, and to ours, that you are more interested in where we build our towns and cities, than you are with the rising unemployment, homeless, and collape of the economy in your own Country? Why is it that while you claim to be in a war against "terror", do you continue to recognize a non-government from a non-existent place that is comprised mostly of admitted Terrorists?

And why, why do we as Jews care? We care because we were together in the sand pits of Egypt; We were together at Sinai. We were together when G-d gave us Torah, and we we were together when a mad man tried to destroy us sixty five years ago. We care because we know that our place is not here. We care because we know, deep down, that our place is in Jerusalem; in Tel Aviv; in Beer Sheva; on Kibbutzim and on Moshavot; On the west side of the green line and on the east. In the north of Galilee and in the Negev. In Rosh haNikra and in Eilat.

Every year on Pesach, we say l'Shana Habaah b'Yerushalayim. Let us all do our best to make this a reality, as a United people, a people living as Am Chofshi b'Arteinu, as a Free Nation in our Land, we cannot be, and we will not be bullied. Together my dear friends, we can support our Birthright and stand together with the words of David Ben Gurion and Moshe Feiglin and be absolutely faithful to the Land of Israel.

Chaverai: We are faced with dilemas every day, if not every hour of every day. Many of them problems to which we have little or no control, but must face them regardless. We do, however, have control of choices that we have. How we face these challenges and how we respond to the outcome. How do we face life? Do we continue to be brought down by the negative, or do we look the world dead on, and remember the words Modeh Ani? Do we get upset about the morning drive traffic, or do we thank G-d that we are alive to BE in the traffic? Should we be upset that we have to sit in the traffic, or do we thank G-d that we have a job, and are healthy to be able to perform the job?

Maybe, Chaverai, maybe my friends these are more challenges from haShem. Clearly, G-d asks of us one thing, and one thing only: VeAhavta et haSmem Elokeicha, You shall love the L-rd your G-d, B'chol levavecha, ub'chol Nafsheicha, ub'chol Meodeicha, with all your heart, all your soul and with all your strength. Yes, we have Six Hundred and Thirteen Mitzvot, 613 Commandments that make up this love, but if we can remember just one, that of loving our neighbor as we do ourselves, this alone will help us to be better people. This alone will help us repair our damaged world. This alone will stop all war and agression. This alone, will bring Peace.

During these Aseret Yemei Tshuvah, these Ten Days of Awe, of Repentence and Atonement, May G-d Bless you and Keep You; May G-d shine his face upon you and guide you; May be gracious onto you and bring you Peace.

Yehi Ratzon Milfaneicha, haShem Elokeinu, v'Elokei Avoteinu, Shetikadesh aleinu Shana Tovah U'Metukah. May it be your will, haShem, our G-d and G-d of our ancestors, that you bless us with a New and a Sweet Year.

And let us say, Amen.

Shana Tovah, u'G'mar Chatima Tovah, B'Ahava u'Vrachrot..

.
Rabbi Alan Abrams

Some Words for Rosh HaShana

2009-09-20T20:35:00.031-07:00

September 18, 2009
א בתשרי, תש"ע ראש השנה א

Modeh Ani Lefaneicha, Melekh chai v’Kayam. I bow before you, my living King, in gratitude of your returning my soul to me.

This prayer is usually recited once daily. Upon awakening in the morning, we thank G-d for being alive to live yet another day in this wonderful world that He created for us. For the last twenty months, I find myself uttering this prayer more than once daily; sometimes even numerous times in any given hour.

On this Shabbat, on This Rosh HaShana, as we gather here, some of us meeting for the first time, as a new Kehillah. As a new Community. A Community dedicated to Tikun Olam, to repairing the world, one Mitzvah at a time; One Commandment at a time; One Act of Loving Kindness at a time. A Community dedicated to each other. A Community in which we may live, laugh, love and pray, as one.

We continue to remember that this amazing, this incredible world was created by HaShem, in six days, and on the seventh day, G-d rested from all his work which he had made, and He hallowed that day, and He sanctified it as a day of rest, because on the seventh day, G-d rested.

As many of you know, I am a card-carrying, died in the wool, certified Shabbat-a-holic. I love everything about Shabbat. I love the smells of Shabbat; I love the songs on Shabbat; I love the Shabbat table guests, and the chicken soup; the matzo balls and the Tzimis; the longer Birkat haMazon and the Zmiros afterward, sitting long into late in the night with my kids. I love my 3rd graders on Friday afternoon most of all. Just when the week appears to have eaten me up, they pick me up and with their little eight year old voices and smiles, bring Shabbat to me. Right into my heart, not that I couldn’t find Shabbat by myself, but they help start bringing in Shabbat on… On Thursday morning.

On this Shabbat, I hope that we are able to, all of us, become Shabbat-a-holics. On this Rosh HaShana, I hope that as a Community, we are able to come together as only a Community can, and for the next ten days, at least, remember the little things that third graders still find so amazing. Whether it is a bird flying high up above, or an insect disappearing into the ground below; whether it be the blowing wind or the wetness of the rain or the warmth from just standing in the sun. These things, all things amazing to them, used to be amazing to us. In truth, we used to be them.

Two years ago, exactly tonight on the Jewish calendar, I was not thanking G-d for being alive. I had even asked him to not allow me to wake up a week before and five days later, he honoured my wish and two days later, took me for a little ride. For two months.

While my family spent their time praying for my improbable return, they also prepared themselves for the certainty of new lives and new beginnings without a husband, without a father; without a son and without a brother, I spent the 10 Yemei Teshuvah, the ten Days of Atonement, feeling that I was at the bottom of a box, a box with wet dirt walls, and prayed. And cried. And prayed some more. I spent my ten days of Teshuvah doing mamash, Teshuvah. In the end, after more than sixty days, G-d did in fact, return my soul to me.

Tonight, I recall that time spent at the bottom of the box, even though the memory is faint. I share the memory with you as not just your Rabbi, but as your friend, and ask that together, over the next ten days, we find ways to do more Teshuvah. That together, we find ways to return. To return not only to our heritage and beliefs, but that together, we as G-d to return to us our souls, and return to us the faith and the hope; the belief; the emuna, that we can help repair this earth that G-d so beautifully created 5,770 years ago today.

I try again and again to think of what creation might have been. I try to imagine viewing creation on a large IMAX screen; Dolby Digital Surround Sound:

A flash of light; The wind blowing and waves of water spread over this globe of nothing; A sky forming above, blue in colour and of grandiose expanse; Land forming from under the water and separating the oceans, Continent by Continent. All the while, beautiful classical violins and wind instruments play never-before-heard music in the background, while G-d does his work. Seedlings of grass, and trees and fruit; vegetation and bright green earth; Flowers of all kinds in all coulours followed by stars in the sky; the sun and the moon and the formation of moving time, all just exactly according to G-d's divine plan.

I try again and again to imagine if this is what it was really like. I try again and again in my mind, to rebuke science and non-believing spokespersons who wish to convince me (us) that this could have ever been; that a "big bang" took place Gazillions of years ago and that everything that we see somehow came from that. Maybe the "big bang" was G-d's creation of light? Honestly, I believe the Book of Bereishit. It's easier; It's more spiritual; It's more believable, to me anyway.

I believe that G-d caused the world to flood and that Noah saved living creatures as he was to asked to do by G-d; That G-d had a Covenant with Abraham and that today we continue to live by that covenant; That we all received Torah at Sinai; and that the world is based on three things, Torah, Avodah (service to G-d) and Gemilut Chassidim, acts of loving kindness. I believe that together, as a Community, we can do Tikkun Olam, we can fix and change the world simply by being good, nice and honest people.

Modeh Ani Lefaneicha, Melekh chai v’Kayam. I bow before you, my living King, in gratitude of your returning my soul to me, and thank you every minute of every day for continuing to grant me life, and I thank you G-d for showing me your trust in allowing our new Community to be here together these Days of Awe in hopes of becoming closer to you, and to G-d.

Shabbat Shalom and Shana Tovah.

Rabbi Alan Abrams

*** Should any of you be in the Phoenix/Scottsdale area for Yom Kippur and wish to observe Yom Kippur with us, please let us know as soon as possible.***

Nines

2009-09-10T16:55:00.000-07:00

At the outset of this week's column, I find it important to answer a few questions from readers, if for no other purpose, than to set the record straight.

When this column began, it was written as a place for me to write, about many things. Some earlier writings (if they can still be found online) screamed of politically incorrectness, and laughed at many people, places and events; many of which we observe, and even participate in on a continual basis. Admittedly, I also was somewhat politically incorrect, and as this column has emerged, so I have, and while I continue and tend to lean more on life experiences, while keeping the content both here (in writing), in our newly forming Synagogue and other public places, as well as my private life, as "Rated 'Y' - for Yiddish, as possible, I am human, and continue to choose this forum to share important pieces of my life with you. I assure you that should our new Congregation, Emek haMidbar begin to send out newsletters, and I am asked to contribute as the Rabbi and Spiritual Leader, Those Divrei Torah will stand different from these. I continue to be happy to share these moments with you, my friends, as a glimpse into my heart and my life, which, as the name reflects, is far from normal. Normal IS indeed overrated. I've been there.

Nines

My father, Steve Abrams was born in Detroit, Michigan on August (8) first (1) = 9, Nineteen Hundred and Twenty Seven (9). He left us and Olam haZeh a year and a half ago, on January (1) eighth (8) = 9. Many times over our lifetimes, my sisters and I and our collective families have lived in homes, in which the addresses added up to nine. My mother was born on July (7) twentieth (2+0=2) =9.

Last night, on 09-09-09, the new Tim Burton film "#9" was shown in theatres across the globe at 9:09pm; and at our local AMC, the movie was projected in, obviously, auditorium... nine.

Ted Williams, the greatest of all Boston Red Sox wore number 9; The Red Wings all time superstar, Gordie Howe owned number nine, as did Sonny Jurgensen from the Redskins, Reggie Jackson (before he moved on to the Yankees), Roger Maris, who held the all-time home run record before it was broken by Mark Maguire wore number nine when he broke the record in 1961.

When I got home last night from working at the theatre, I had known that all day was September 9, but had never correlated September 9 with 09-09. Two years ago, September 9 was the last day that I spent with my family before being rushed to the hospital in respiratory failure, and the worst was not even to come for another two days, on September 11, Erev Rosh HaShana. So acutely aware was I that it has now been two years since I puffed on a cigarette; two years since my old life gave out; and two years since I looked up from an Emergency Room gurney and asked: Am I going to die tonight? So acutely aware, that I thought of little else for most of the day.

On September 19, 1919, my grandmother was born. 9-19-1919 - The numbers resonate even today. Its the easiest family birthday to remember! Still, for me, one of the most important days in all of my life was always just September 9, and not 09-09. Until yesterday.

Every time that I saw the date yesterday, nines came at me, almost as if in flight; My father's nines also came flying at me in droves of emotion and despair, despite the jubilation that I survived somehow, two years ago; despite it all.

When I got home, I decided that I absolutely have to write about nines this week; and not really for those reasons either, but because in nine days it will be Rosh HaShana, our New Year.

On Rosh HaShana, over a two day period, we will stand and silently reflect in our Amidah Prayers, nine times. We will hit our hearts with our fists on nine different occasions, and we will say the memorial Kaddish prayer nine times.

We will look at the letters that make up the Hebrew word for truth, אמת "emet",and remember that when we add the Aleph, Mem and Tav together, we come up with, you guessed it: nine; and the number of days between Rosh HaShana and Erev (eve of) Yom Kippur is, of course, 9.

Nine plus nine equals 18, which of course means life. If we are all luck enough to have "life times ten", that would equal 180, which, if added together, would equal nine. And last, but not least, on each day of Rosh HaShana, we will call up nine Aliyot to the Torah.

I remember now that we all have nine more days to make apologies. We have nine days left to take out our paper and draw our vertical columns and place the names into the column in which we believe them to belong, and nine days in which to make things right with those whom we have hurt.

If I might ask please, that each of you forgive me for any wrongs that I may have done to you in this past year.

Shabbat is but a day away. The thought alone brings goosebumps to my arms.

This Shabbat, I wish for you to achieve and gain...

Rest, Health, Family, Prayer, Grace, Friendship, Holiness, Love and finally Happiness.

From the Midbar that we call Arizona, I send Ahavah u'Vrachot. Love and Blessings for the last Shabbat of the year.

Rabbi Alan Abrams

Confessions

2009-08-28T10:11:00.007-07:00

As we are now one week into the Jewish month of Elul, and three weeks away from the Rosh haShana/Yom Kippur/Sukkot/Hoshana Raba/Shmini Atzeret/Simchat Torah Daven-a-thon, I am excited.

The birth of a new community thrills me to no end, and I know that my dad is smiling down on us all from above, and all points beyond.

As we discussed previously, Elul is the perfect time to give and accept slichot (apologies) to and from those whom we may have, or definitely have hurt in the past year. Last year, I read a piece from R' Tvzi Freeman, a very gifted scholar, writer and Rav in the Observant world. Rabbi Freeman had an exercise that he shared with us, and I have taken a little of his exercise and combined it with a little of my own "stuff"* and created what I think works for all of us this time of year.

It matters not whether you are Observant, Orthodox, Conservative, Reform, Christian, Buddhist, or alien from the Planet of Xenon. Try it out, and see what you think.

Let's start off with a piece of copy or printer paper, or even loose leaf paper, and turn it sideways, so that it is facing you on the table in landscape orientation.

On the piece of paper, let's draw three diagonal lines forming 4 columns, left - to - right.

On top of the far left column, which we will call column one, write "I OWE". In the second column, write "I FEAR". In the third column, write "I COVET", and in the fourth column, write "THEY OWE".

Sit down with your paper and draft four lists. The first being those to whom you believe you owe an apology. The second, write the names of those who you fear. This could be your employer, or mother-in-law, or the neighbor's dog. The third column is used to list all those whom we covet. Are we jealous of the guy at work who just got a raise? The bimbette that received a promotion, even though you work 100 times harder? Frank on the corner who won the lottery? Or maybe, we are jealous of the couple who appear to always be so in love even after forty-seven years.

The big list, friends, is the last one, and probably the easiest one to complete. This is the list of people who have wronged US this past year. That's right. The jerk who stole that parking place. That sorry-excuse for a best friend who dated your boyfriend. Your mother for meddling in your life, or maybe, the girl at work who has no idea that you are head over heels for her and she never even says good morning. All of the people in the fourth list owe you apologies.

Now that we have made our lists, and checked them twice. Tried to find who had been naughty or nice, it is time to begin our Elul Practice.

I have found that sitting in a softly lit or dark room works best. While holding our lists to our hearts, let us close our eyes look as deeply into our Neshama, our soul, as we are able. I usually find mine somewhere in my chest area, and it appears to be a light, not unlike a "Ner Tamid", the Eternal lamp above the Ark in Shul). When we find it, we need to gaze upon it; stare at it; examine it, and dissect it. We need to respect it, be mindful of it and acknowledge it. Once we acknowledge it, and know that it is there, we need to remember how it got there. How G-d placed it there, and left this tiny light inside you when you were born, and how it grows brighter and dims lower from year to year, and month to month and day to day.

Let us now look into the light and examine each transgression of each of the people in list four. Did Billy upset me that much last week? Did my cousin really mean all those things that she said? And we continue to think about each one, and each person on the list, and begin forgiving them. One-by-one, until the list is empty. We might even remember that someone on list four, should really be on list one! If these people, our list four folks ask our forgiveness, great. If not? Well, we have already forgiven them, and forgotten. Our Neshama is clear in that department.

Moving to the right on our page, one-by-one we look into our souls and dismiss our jealousies. And one-by-one, we do what we can to dismiss our fears, for if we have faith, we know that we are protected, and that no harm may come our way.

With our page now almost empty, we need to sit down and make some phone calls. Send a few e-mails. Maybe a letter to Aunt Sadie on Long Island who doesn't hear so well anymore, and has never seen a PC. Maybe we just need to go next door and ask the neighbor for his forgiveness for not being as good a neighbor as we might have been.

Once we have done this exercise once, or twice or a dozen times between now and the First of Tishrei (Rosh haShana), we will truly be able to take the Ten Days of Teshuvah, the Days of Awe, and use our time to redevelop our relationship with G-d.

I have a confession to make. I realized this several years ago, but never had the guts to go public, so to speak. I never trusted the world to know this secret about me. I even tried a few times in my life to change, by acting differently. By acting more "mainstream" and, well, NORMAL. But as the title of this column says, and this I believe that we have all known for a very long time: Normal really IS overrated. It is boring and dull. But it is also safe. And quiet.

I think that I first discovered this about myself when I was seven or eight years old, and every Friday afternoon, my sisters and I would run up the stairs to get quick showers and change into nice clothes... I was pretty sure of this condition when, as a married man with a child of my own I would get excited to meet at my parents house on Fridays, even if it took hours of bumper-to-bumper traffic to get there.

I have struggled with my heart, and inside my head with how to "come out" as it is... What would people think? How would they react? Would I be really, really weird now, as opposed to just really weird before this announcement? Here's what I decided. If I keep this to myself, I will always wonder why I never told anyone. I might even begin to loathe myself as being untrue to myself and to others. If I tell, and spill the proverbial beans, what's the worst that could happen? Exactly.

I am a Shabbataholic. I am a true, dyed in the wool, one-of-a-kind, certified SHABBATAHOLIC.

I love everything about Shabbat. I love the smell of the house. I love the food (obviously, if you have seen me lately); I love reading Torah on Thursday morning in anticipation of being able to say SHABBAT SHALOM that evening because Friday is EREV Shabbat!

I love sitting with my kids and singing Zmirot. I love spending Kabalat Shabbat with my students in Friday afternoon. I love buying Challah and dessert and bringing home flowers and knowing that the week, no matter how good or trying it was, is over.

It is Shabbat. Absent an emergency call, the phone goes unanswered; On Friday night we sing and we sometimes dance. We are together. We are Shabbat.

On Saturday morning, we daven. We thank G-d for all he has given and continues to give, and we hallow his Shabbat as he has asked us to do. And Havdalah time on Saturday evening, as beautiful a service as it is, is also the saddest for me. Shabbat is over. But-- It will be here again in Six days, twenty three hours, fifty nine minutes, and counting.........I am, my dear friends, a Shabbataholic. And I am proud to be a Shabbataholic. Would you like to join me?

Shorts:

Rosh haShana and Yom Kippur Services for the newly formed Congregation Emek haMidbar will be held at the Clarion Hotel in Scottsdale, September 18, 19, 20 and September 27 evening for Kol Nidre and September 28 for Yom Kippur. Shofar will be blown at 7:49pm. Tickets are available by contacting me or another member of the committee. You will be receiving an e-vite just after Shabbat. I will never refuse entry to one who wishes to daven with us, but as there are expenses to cover, we are asking that a minimum donation of $100 per person or $180 for two is made. There is no charge for anyone under Bar/Bat Mitzvah age. Please contact me should you have any questions relative to tickets.

Will you be a link in An Unbroken Chain?
As you may know, we are making An Unbroken Chain, a feature film based on the true life story of a Holocaust Survivor. With a few dollars and a few minutes, you can help us make this film happen. Please visit http://6mfor6m.org for more details about how you can take action.

Thank you to Bob and Michelle Casselman for their hospitality and the wonderful Havdalah reception last week with Congregation Ahavat Shalom. I thank you, Rabbi Allouche for inviting me to participate.

From one Shabbataholic to hopefully many more, I wish you the happiest of Shabbatot. Shabbat Shalom u'Mevorach. Ahavah u'Vrachot. Love and Blessings...

--Rabbi Alan Abrams

Rosh Chodesh Elul - Getting ready for a new beginning

2009-08-21T16:34:00.000-07:00

Before I begin tonight's column, I feel an absolute need to share with you some of the events that occurred almost immediately upon publishing this column last Sunday evening. If you missed Sunday's insertion, "The Week that Was and the Week to Come", feel free to check it out, or in the event that you already have, you may wish to re-visit it after reading what I am about to relate to you.

First, I must set the record straight about a few comments made in that column:

First and foremost, comments relative to my personal vulnerability were spoke directly to my post-illness experiences of acting and feeling at times emotionally stronger than I am in real life. We are all vulnerable to a certain extent and my feelings of exemption from this vulnerability due to having recovered from death were not only unfounded, but the reality of my own vulnerability hit me like a Mac truck of late, as we approach the High Holidays and my second year without the physical presence of my father (more later).

To make this perfectly clear, I must immediately inform some of you that may be seeking my revelation of the identity of the "villain" gossip spreader, that you will be sadly disappointed. Not only will I now reveal this culprit, but I will spill all the beans at the same time. There is no, nor has there ever been any particular "villain". I was not speaking of any one individual, living or dead, that to my knowledge has ever caused me any personal pain by means of Lashon HaRa, rather, I was speaking to the multitude of people who on a daily basis feel the necessity to spread rumours, and bear false witness seemingly for sport. The existence of this 'group' became quite evident to me when my Monday morning browse through e-mail found me reading at least three e-mails (and later answering two or three phone calls), all asking me the same thing: Why had I accused them publicly in this column of committing the act of Lashon HaRa! Was someone feeling guilty?

Let's end that discussion here.

Last word about Sunday's edition: I sincerely apologize to any of you that received multiple mailings of "Normal is Overrated". I was trying an auto-e-mailer, and it obviously didn't work very well, when a mistake in one e-mail address' cause the system to send and send and send. Again, I am sorry to have overloaded you.

On to this evening's insertion.

You may remember this past April when I wrote that the Passover Season is really the "Most Wonderful Time of the Year" (04/07/2009). Celebrating our holiday of independence from slavery in Egypt has always been my favorite holiday, but Rosh Hashana, the Jewish New Year has always been very special to me personally as well.

It was a time for my father and I to spend in Synagogue together.

On the southwest corner of West Pico Boulevard and Cochran Avenue in Los Angeles, more specifically, at 5258 West Pico, a building stood that for good reason will forever hold my heart at bay and the mere recollection that that old white (later, yellow) brick structure is gone will forever break that same heart.

I do not believe this writer's heart is broken by the absence of structure that once stood on that corner, rather, by the absence of what that building stood for.

In 1961, my father purchased The West Pico Hospital for Animals. Over the years, that animal hospital became a symbol of the changing community. It was a constant during changing and at times challenging times. It was a place where owners of dogs, cats and even a few birds knew that hard times would not stand in the way of their being treated with kindness, love, respect and incredible care. Not one time in his fifty-five years of Veterinary practice did he ever refuse treatment to a pet because the owners could not afford the treatment. Not once did he ever euthanize an animal due to financial restraints. He was just that kind of man. My father's picture was in our dictionary, right next to the word Tzadik. Righteous.

My favorite times were, believe it or not, toiling away in the kennel areas back at Pico and Cochran. The lunch runs to Corey Market across the street, or the days that we would take a nice long walk to Fairfax and visit The Bagel Restaurant and Deli.

I miss my father every day more, but never as much as I seem to miss him at this time of year. The High Holidays were the most special times that we spent in Shul. I think that it is more due to the fact that it was just us. My sisters rarely sat in Shul, and my mother would come by around 11 or so to see friends and to be seen. And she would leave. My dad and I would be in a zone, though. Although we each had our individual ways of davening (praying), we were in complete sync one with another, and it was a rare occasion when we would be reading faster or slower than each other. In Shul on Rosh HaShana and Yom Kippur, it was almost as if we were one person. One neshama, one soul, in two bodies.

You are most likely about ready to look up from your screen and ask what on earth this all has to do with Rosh Chodesh Elul. I assure you that it has everything to do with Elul, and our everlasting wish to start over from the beginning; to take a Mulligan; to get a "Do-Over". To get a new lease on life; a new beginning.

As Jews, we are conditioned to believe that "On Rosh HaShana the Book of Life is written and on Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement, it is sealed". Who shall live and who shall die; who by fire and who by water; who shall become rich and who poor; who will be happy and who will be sad, and so forth. Rarely do many of us look at the fact that each and every day, we all have opportunity to atone. Each and every day, we have the opportunity to change our lives by virtue of just being a good person. By remembering that we are bound to not treat others in a manner which we would not like to be treated, and to live accordingly.

The first paragraph after the Shema teaches us that G-d asks us to love him with all our hearts, all our souls and all of our might. That we teach this diligently to our children, as our parents taught us.

The month of Elul is the absolute perfect month to live by. It is a time to reflect and to atone. To respect and ask forgiveness of those whom we may have hurt in the past year. Elul, in essence, is an extra thirty days to "settle up" with friends and foes alike. To both ask for and to grant forgiveness. We are all human, and we all make mistakes. We also have the ability to forgive. We should assert and utilize this more often.

The traditions of becoming more spiritual with each passing day appeals to me. How about you? What if we could... What if we could make every month like Elul? If we did, then maybe we as a people, we, as a world might have the ability to get past things like greed and jealousy; selfishness and Lashon HaRa? Maybe just then, could our world be complete.

Until that day, however, we must remember to continue to build and repair our world. This wonderfully beautiful world that G-d has so graciously given us.

During the month, let's do our best to discuss the virtues that are afforded us in Elul. A friend of mine posted just yesterday that she wished we had 12 months of Elul. To this, I say, Amen.

---Shorts---

High Holiday Services will be held at The Clarion Hotel, Scottsdale on September 18, 19, 20 (Rosh HaShana), and September 27 evening and September 28 for Yom Kippur. The Clarion is located at the corner of Chaparral and Scottsdale Road. Please check your e-mail after Shabbat, or contact me at rabbiabrams@q.com for complete details and reservations.

Stephanie Silverman Houser greatly appreciates your musical contributions, see her post: High School Grads Come Together 20 years later to Make a Holocaust Film at http://anunbrokenchainthemovie.blogspot.com/. We all need to get involved with this project. It is truly one of the greatest Tikkun Olam projects ever.

Social Networking is fast becoming the most active source of marketing anywhere. Many networking groups exist right here in the Valley of the Sun, like Austin's Who's Who, and Raven Events, among others. The best place I have found to find these groups is Gelie's NetworkingPhoenix.com. Head on over to http://www.networkingphoenix.com/ and get ready to meet some incredible people.

---Final Words---

One Thousand Days plus One Week is the length of time that our brother Gilad Shalit has been kept captive by Terrorists in Gaza. Let us please try to keep him in our thoughts and in our prayers this Shabbat.

When I was in Jerusalem in February and March, I was handed this prayer for Gilad.

May it be your will, oh L-rd, our G-d and G-d of our Forefathers, that You shall take pity, forgive and have mercy upon Your servant, Gilad, son of Aviva and Noam Shalit And You shall save him in both physical salvation and compassion, together with all the hostages and prisoners of
Israel, Your People. Amen.

May your Shabbat be restful and relaxing. May your weekend be filled with happiness and in the company of family and loved ones.

From the Midbar that we call Arizona, I wish you Shabbat Shalom, and send Ahava u'Vrachot, Love and blessings.

--R' Alan Abrams

The Week that Was and the Week to Come...

2009-08-16T00:22:00.000-07:00

Tonight I write to you with much to say. Most of it good, in fact, some even most brilliant in-fact, and some, not so much so. To say that some of my words may be disappointing, might even be an understatement, and a gross one at that, but nevertheless, since we last visited, much has transpired, so, rather than tease you more, let's get to it.

The Week that Was and the Week to Come...

This past week, I have learned that I am still vulnerable, as are we all. I am still subject to inner and emotional pain, and even though, my beliefs are solid and true, G-d cannot shield us from feeling and emotion. If he did, we would not be ourselves, and that would be worse.

This past week, I learned that "Lashon haRa", the Jewish ethical standard for not gossiping or talking about others is really not practiced nearly as much as it is preached, and that many who preach about how to avoid Lashon haRa, and how to live without gossiping and without speaking ill of people, are at times truly the largest offenders. Many of those use Lashon haRa in the form of Omission, as opposed to out and out gossip.

In other words, one who promises to support a person, and at the same time makes a recommendation against that person, even if by means of abstention, or not commenting at all is surely as guilty as the one who is open and honest about his bad feelings toward another, right or wrong. By his silence alone, he is commenting in a negative manner. This is surely Lashon haRa. Especially if the offender carries with him great public support, admiration and respect.

A few weeks ago, in Parshat VaEtchanan, we again read the Ten Commandments. We read about keeping Shabbat, the Sabbath, and about honouring one's father and mother; and about bearing false witness. We also read the words of the "Shema", the cornerstone for all faith, that
G-d is one, and that we should love Him with all of our heart, soul and strength; and we read how to go about doing this (Deuteronomy 6). We also read what would happen if we do listen, and what would happen if we do not (Deuteronomy 11:13 - 21).

Tonight, I ask you this series of questions: Have we not followed? Have we fallen into a pattern of worshiping not G-d, but a different G-d? One who is green in colour and has different numbers in the corners? 1, 5, 10, 20, 50, 100? Have we become greedy to the point that G-d has taken offense and closed up the Heavens to rain, thus causing our crops to fail?

Could it be that our failing economy and lack of sustainable peace is a result of our own doing? This is not an answer for me to answer, but for us all to contemplate and do our best to repair this beautiful world that G-d has created for us. This is not a time to gossip and spread Lashon HaRa. We are only a few days from the beginning of the month of Elul. The beginning cycle of atonement leading up to the New Year and Yom Kippur.

Let us all do our best to end this year on a high note. With happiness and love in our hearts.
That said, the week is new and it really is time to move forward and to not spend so much time looking back. I need to learn to be better at this.

Tomorrow morning will bring me a new group of Third Graders and I cannot remember being this excited for the first day of school in a long time. Thank you, NI and MS for this incredible opportunity.

Plans for the High Holidays are quickly falling into place and hopes for wonderful Rosh HaShana and Yom Kippur Services are being worked on constantly. We are hopeful for a new year filled with joy and love; old friends and new, and maybe even a whole new Congregation and Community to build. Remember that we are only, but five plus weeks away, so please watch your e-mail boxes this week for details. If you are in the Valley of the Sun and wish to be included in this mailing, please let me know.

More on the month of Elul and how we can put our arms around the traditions, old and new, will be published, G-d willing, within the next week.

From the dusty and blistering August heat of the place that we call Midbar Arizona, I wish you Ahavah u'Vrachot. Love and blessings for a Shavuah Tov. A good week, filled with health, happiness and abundant sunshine.

--R' Alan Abrams

Hating Hebrew School

2009-07-31T00:59:00.001-07:00

As we prepare for Shabbat, I thought that I might share an e-mail exchange that I had today.

Today was an observance, as opposed to a "holiday", and is called simply by its date, Tisha b'Av, or the 9th of the month of Av. This day annually marks the destruction of the Holy Temples in Jerusalem. The first Temple was destroyed by the Babylonians in 586 BCE, and the Second Temple by the Romans in 70 CE. On this day, we mourn and we fast. As it is not a holiday, per Se, we are permitted to work, unlike Shabbat and the Festival Holidays, but I have always found it to be a good day for reflection, meditation and learning.

Today, I also chose to respond to a few pieces of e-mail that I received this week through various Judaic List Serves. These e-mail servers deliver questions that range from the simplest of three sentence answers, to some that I refer to others due to their complexity in Jewish Law, or Custom or both.

The question that I received today was: How does one deal with a child who hates Hebrew School? This is always a very difficult question to answer, as usually, someone is insulted, or hurt in the process. Today, I chose to reply in a different way than I might have if today were a day other than Tisha b'Av. Today, I looked for answers outside of the Hebrew School or Synagogue:

Dear Mrs. Cohen (name changed):

I have read your question with great interest, and must reply to you that as much as I do not like admitting it, I have found actually, that most kids don't like going to Hebrew School!

Why would they, really? They get out of "regular school" around 3pm and twice a week get rushed to the Synagogue, not to mention the dreaded Sunday morning!

My experience has shown me that this is more a product of the combination of "at home prioritizing" and for lack of a better word, uninspiring teachers. The more that the family is involved in Shul (Synagogue) life and in Judaica in general, the more interested the children will be. At the same time, we need more inspiring teachers. Couple an inspirational and excited teacher with a child who is growing up in a home where Judaism is alive and vibrant, and you will have a child who loves to learn about Judaism.

It is very hard, for example, for us to teach children about Kashrut (dietary laws) and send them home to a Pork Chop dinner. If we could wave a magic wand over a situation and make it work, we would all look at our own levels of observance and remember that just as our parents brought us into the world, so too did HaShem bring everything into the world, and if we are able to not only respect this, but live more according to the V'eAhavta prayer (You shall love the L-rd your G-d with all your heart, with all your strength and with all your soul), and we follow these instructions by "teaching our children", first at home, and then in the Synagogue, I believe that this symptom can be made to go away.

I would speak with your child's teacher and with the Rabbi and ask their opinion. At the same time, let's look at the children's home base and try to do one more small thing to make it more Jewish; whether this be lighting candles on Friday night, or having two sets of dishes, one for meat and one for dairy. Nothing changes overnight, but the more that we can do, the more important it becomes. When this happens, the child will not only stop disliking Hebrew School, but might just ask for more!

Shabbat Shalom.....

As I finished the letter, I had my own problem and question: Is it the correct way to approach this dilemma by sending the blame to the parents?

The "drop and dump", as it is called has been widespread in Non-Orthodox Religious Schools since I was a child. As we were products of Pre-World War II parents, and they were products of Pre-World War I parents, the scenario has generally played out something like this...

Our grandparents arrive to USA around 1910 ---- Observant

Our parents born around 1920's - 1940's ---- Raised Observant, but upon attaining adulthood, many move to the Suburbs where it it more convenient to practice Judaism in the more liberal settings of Conservative or Reform Judaism. (drop and dump begins)

We are born in the 1960's, 1970's ---- We come from either observant families who are still in the hearts of the cities in which they had always lived, or, we come from families who are already non-observant and more liberal. Our kids have Little League; they have Ballet and Jazz; they have I-Pods and MP3 players and computers and DVD players. They seem to always have something to do, other than Religious School. And, the truth of it is, they do have other things to do.

They will, however, invest in a few years of Judaic education (to 'have' that Bar Mitzvah and party); they might even get roped into a few more years of classes to become Confirmed. Maybe-- Just MAYBE a few will continue on to the local Hebrew High program, but in all honesty, more will not, than those who will.

This is rather sad, is it not? To have all of this wonderful heritage and history and ritual, and to never or rarely practice or use it?

What I would give to be ten years old again and run up the stairs with my sisters to get dressed for Shabbat.

Maybe, together, we can bring some of our brothers and sisters back. Back to those wonderful memories of Shabbatot and Chagim; the festivals of Passover and Shavuot; the wonder of sitting outside in October in the Sukkah that our father struggled for three hours (or more) to screw together, so that we would have it for a week.

Would it not be exciting to be able to see the wonder in the eyes of children, as they learn to become Jewish adults. Then, just maybe, we parents can get more involved again, and eliminate the drop and dump altogether.

May this be G-d's will for Shabbat V'Etchanan, 10-11 Av, 5769; July 31, August 1, 2009.

As a side note, this Shabbat would have been my father's 82nd birthday. May his soul be bound in the book of life forever.

From the Desert that we call Arizona...

Shabbat Shalom; Ahavah u'Vrachot.

Love and Blessings...

--Rabbi Alan Abrams

Journey

2009-07-28T06:32:00.000-07:00

Three weeks and five days ago, I submitted this essay as I was preparing to receive Rabbinical Ordination.

Initially, I felt it too personal to share; too academic (maybe); too long (maybe), however, the sense of pride that I feel in the publishing of this piece has overtaken these thoughts, and I now will talk to you, as I did to my Beit Din, my Judges and Court that awarded my Ordination.

As always, please feel free to comment, publicly or privately.

The Journey

I remember being present at one of only two arguments between my father and his father.

It was a few weeks before Rosh HaShanah in 1970, and we had just left my grandfather’s doctor in Beverly Hills. The doctor had just told my grandfather that he was to not fast on Yom Kippur due to his health. My father argued the doctor’s point, but my grandfather rebutted that he had never not fasted, and that it was a sin to not fast. We were driving to the Rabbi to ask him for the answer.

Strangely, I understand that the other argument that they had, the only other argument, was on the eve of my father’s induction into the Army. My grandfather begged and pleaded with my father to eat whatever the Army gave him. My father said that he could not eat anything that was not Kosher, and would starve first. This discussion too, I have been told, was placed to the Rabbi, who told my father, as the Rabbi did in 1970, that Pikuakh haGoof and Pikuach haNefesh, health of body and health of soul, comes before everything; even Yom Kippur, even Shabbat.

And so, my father ate what was served to him, and my grandfather ate, albeit lightly, on Yom Kippur so that he could take his medication.

The following July, my grandfather had a massive stroke and passed away. My father began going to our Conservative Synagogue every morning and evening to pray and say Kaddish. I loved going with him.

Kohn Chapel on the Beverly Glen side of Sinai Temple in Los Angeles is a hexagonal room with five long pews on each side, a Bima in the center of the room and an Aron Kodesh in the northeastern most corner. The chapel was designed for praying “in the round” and was very comfortable.

In the last row, nearest the Aron Kodesh, sat Nick Mermel, the Shammes or Ritual Director of the large Shul. He would daven mostly with his Siddur in his hand, closed, but with his fingers holding the page. He would chant, all by heart, with such feeling that I believed myself close enough to G-d to reach out and touch him.

I remember that our Rabbi, Hillel Silverman, used to sit in the front row across from Mr. Mermel and seemed to be in a world of his own while davening amongst all of us.

I was only nine or ten years old when I began attending Minyan daily, and even though the reason for our attendance was an observance laid in sadness, with my dad saying Kaddish, the feeling that I got from simply being there was overwhelming. The peace and strength that engrossed itself within my soul was at once both calming and invigorating.

One day, for no reason, except that I felt the need to, during the Shema, I stood at my seat and sang VeAhavta. It became my thing. Every morning and every evening, I would stand and chant VeAhavta. I remember the look on Mr. Mermel’s face, as I did this day in and day out. Both pride and curiosity graced this wonderful man’s face. From that day, and each day since, VeAhavta is recited in trope in Kohn Chapel.

Yearning for the chance to be part of the service, I looked forward to one day being of age to place Tefillin on my arm and join my community in public prayer.

My grandmother passed away just seven months later, and our eleven months of mourning became 18 in February of 1972.

By this time, I was able to lead the Mincha service, and did so several days a week. Each and every time I stepped onto the Bima, I felt a presence within me. A feeling of both relaxation and elation. A feeling of peace and of spirituality.

We also attended services, of course, on Shabbat and Shabbat afternoon. The Seudah Shlishit between Mincha and Maariv/Havdalah was a time that I looked most forward to, as we would discuss Torah, the Parsha of that week, or current affairs in Israel.

Usually, my father had to see patients on Shabbat (he was a Veterinarian), and he would drive me to the Shul, where I would join Cantor Carl Urstein’s Shabbat Choir, backing up the Bar Mitzvah for the Shacharit service. After Shacharit, I would sit with my friends and enjoy the Torah reading and by the time that Musaf was concluded, I was thinking about Mincha.

Chazzan Joe Gole replaced Cantor Urstein following his retirement, and the Chazzan and I became fast friends. He was young, just out of Seminary and loved to teach. I was eleven or twelve and loved learning to daven in different nusachim and melodies, different prayers for different days, and my favorite of all, the Hallel.

I became Bar Mitzvah on November 21, 1974. A Thursday. I finally lay Tefillin and was on the Bima from start to finish. I leined Torah and rose to my first ever Aliyah. It was an incredible morning, but not as incredible as the Shabbat morning two days later.

My third Aliyah to the Torah took place at the Kotel on December 3; a rainy Monday, Erev Chanukkah. At a bima ten feet in front of the Kotel, on the far right of the prayer section of the Plaza, and right next to the Mechitza, I davened Shacharit and was called again to the Torah. It was the most memorable Aliyah of them all. From out of nowhere, I was hit by several flying pieces of hard candy, as Yemenite women screeched and screamed from behind the Mechitza. I knew then that Judaica would one day be my vocation as well as my avocation.

As life moved forward, Zionism and Israel became a larger part of my life. Spending each summer in Israel for the next several years reminded me of how alive I felt each time I was there; how my people called to me and how my heart felt full and satisfied with each breath of air from the skies above Eretz Yisrael.

Albeit growing up in a Conservative Synagogue, certain practices that had become commonplace in the more liberal world of Conservative Judaism were still somewhat taboo to our family. Even though both of my sisters became B’not Mitzvah, and leined Torah, my father was never really comfortable with women on the Bima, and the truth is, that neither was I.

When called upon to need to say Kaddish for my own son, beginning in 1991, I would always seek a Congregation that would sport a “Kosher” minyan; A Minyan with ten men as opposed to ten people. About these leniencies, I was not fond. Not just because it seemed unusual to me, but more, I believe, because it did not seem natural. However, within the past few years, I have learned that in order to truly advocate Judaism, we must always be open to new ideas and interpretations.

I once was asked to describe how I would teach Torah, from the beginning of Bereshit to the end of Devarim, from a chronological annual standpoint, as opposed to Sedra-by-Sedra.

I responded that the Torah is, of course, divided into exactly fifty-four Parshiot or portions so that we start and finish reading the entire Torah in exactly one year. The Rabbanim of old who designed the reading scheme were brilliant. Shortly after Rosh HaShana, twenty days, to be exact, we finish Sefer Dvarim and begin Sefer Bereshit immediately following. The cycle is never-ending.

Prior to Rosh HaShana by a month exactly, it has recently become custom to begin our atonement on the beginning of the month of Elul, theoretically allowing ourselves an extra month to atone to those whom we may have hurt, and to be able to fully concentrate on our relationship with G-d during the time between Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur.

But, in reality, our Teshuvah does not end on the close of Yom Kippur, rather, at sundown on Hoshana Raba, which ends Sukkot and begins Shemini Atzeret. This is also known as Erev Simchat Torah. My initial question was why do we not begin to read Torah on Rosh Hashana? Because Torah teaches us that Shmini Atzeret is the 22nd of Tishrei and Simchat Torah is the 23rd of Tishrei. In Israel, Shmini Atzeret and Simchat Torah are on the same day, the 22nd of Tishrei. The Torah, designates Rosh HaShana as the first day of the Seventh Month (Tishrei) as a non work day that Shofar is sounded.*

This being the case, and as both Mishna and Torah dictate when Rosh HaShana is, but Torah alone dictates that Simchat Torah is annually on the 22nd of Tishrei, the correct assumption would be this: we have an extra 30 days (Elul) to make things right with people whom we may have hurt. We have ten days of Teshuvah between Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur, and another 10 days from Yom Kippur until the end of Hoshana Raba to make things right with G-d. Once we are finished repenting, we can celebrate. And what could be a better way to celebrate, than beginning to read Torah from the beginning?

The next question that we may ask ourselves is relative to understanding what we are reading. According to every TaNaCH, and every Sefer Torah, every word in the original and accepted text is identical, the first words being: בראשית ברא אלקים את השמים ואת הארץ. I have always understood this sentence to mean: In the Beginning G-d created the Heavens and the Earth.

*- Mishna designates four separate Roshei Shana. On the first of Nisan, the new year for the kings and for the festivals; on the first of Elul, the new year for the tithing of animals; on the first of Tishrei, the new year for years, for the Sabbatical years and for the Jubilee years and for the planting and for the vegetables; and on the first of Shevat, the new year for the trees.

JPS, The Jewish Publication Society, has for over 120 years published and distributed Judaic texts in many languages, including English, Spanish and French. They are known throughout the world as the number one publishing house for Judaic text, and the way that JPS reads this line is: When G-d began to create…

Initially when I read this, I had to read and reread this sentence, as I did not understand how all of the brilliant Gaonei Talmud and Chachamei Torah could understand this sentence to read as they wrote. Certainly their Hebrew is more educated than mine, but nowhere could I find any relation to the words “when”, “began” or “to create”.

And then I looked further down, in the same chapter, the original and accepted text says: ויהי ערב, ויהי בוקר יום אחד. And when compared again with the English in the JPS translation, there was a discrepancy. The JPS scholars read this line as: and it was evening and it was morning the first day. Again, I am not able to locate the word ראשון meaning “first”. The direct translation from my understanding is: and it was evening and it was morning one day.

After inspecting more and more of the JPS English translation against the original and accepted text, I found what appeared to be error after error. Could this just be JPS? I looked at other publishers, and they also had different translations. I checked in Spanish. I checked in French. I even had a friend check in Russian. What I found was that almost every translation that I found was different. And the conclusion that came to me was this:

If all the brilliant, knowledgeable, and learned Gaonei Torah could not agree on one translation, how could we? In other words, unless we study TaNaCH in the original and accepted text, in Hebrew, how can we know if anything that we are studying is accurate? And, my recommendation at that time was that unless we can study in Hebrew, we should not study, as we may not be learning what G-d intended for us to learn.

In the past year, I began working with a man who would be the first congregant with whom I would experience the final steps to Olam haBa. He had called the Synagogue seeking someone to visit with him and help him come to terms with both his illness and that of his wife, who would die the next day. This man, Bob, told me of how his father was very observant, but also very strict, and due to his strict upbringing, Bob not only did not enjoy going to Shul, but when he turned 18 and moved away from home, he stopped practicing Judaism altogether.

As I drove to his home, I at first asked myself why he called the Synagogue for help if he wasn’t comfortable there. That thought lasted about a minute, and my mind turned to strategy. How could I convince this man that G-d can help him? Would I need to turn to my own personal story of how I died a year before and that G-d returned me to Olam HaZeh after a two month coma to do Teshuvah and help people like him? Would I need to show him my tracheotomy scar and my oxygen tank for him to trust that I am on his side? Or, would he just want to talk?

It turned out to be a little of all of these. Over the next eleven weeks, although Bob never did “get” Torah, per say, he understood the spirit of Torah in the most literal of ways, as he did his own Teshuva with his daughters, and with G-d.

As I sat with him at Hospice, his daughter just having left the room, he asked me if he could leave now. I told him that it was okay, and he asked me to say Kaddish for him. I agreed and Bob closed his eyes and rejoined his wife.

During the week that I spent with Bob at the Hospice Center, I was introduced to a lady named Rosalyn. Rosalyn, an end stage Alzheimer’s patient seemed to meet me anew each time I would visit, and I continued to visit her for two or three weeks after Bob had left us to complete his journey. Each time I would see her, her eyes would light up, and she would excitedly beam “Rabbi Honey!” It didn’t matter to Rosalyn whether I spent a half hour or ten minutes; only that I was there and that I cared.

One Sunday evening, on my way home from Maariv, I stopped in to see Rosalyn. As soon as I entered her room, she again sprouted up. “RABBI HONEY!! WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?” This visit was very different from the previous visits. On this Sunday, Rosalyn was bright, aware and totally lucid. As I sat with her, she recalled her life story, and told me how she lived in Manhattan and then on Long Island. How her husband used to take her to dinner every night and how he used to buy her a new dress and hat every week. She told me of her upbringing and about how her father was a sickly man, but that he always worked hard to take care of her and her sister. She talked and I listened, occasionally jotting down a note or two. As the hour got closer to the nine o’clock shift change, Rosalyn asked me about that week’s Parsha. I told her that the Parsha was VaYetze and that I would be happy to talk with her about it the following night, and we made a date for Monday after Maariv.

On the way home, I believed that I would not see her on Monday. I thought that her room would be empty the next day, and I called her daughter to relay that I had just seen her mom, and that she told me her life story. It was then that her daughter asked me for a strange favor. (I had not noticed before, because she was always under blankets, but according to her daughter, for the past fifteen years, not only had Rosalyn suffered from Alzheimer’s, but also from a bone condition that caused all of her fingers to break, her arms and legs to cross and wind around each other and her back to curve so badly, that she was in an almost constant ‘L’ shape.) Her daughter asked me to please call the Jewish Mortuary and ask that they please not break her back to fit her into the casket when the time came.

I did as she asked, and following Maariv the next day, I went to visit Rosalyn. Just in case she was still in her room, I had my TaNaCH in hand and a few short, but sweet Divrei Torah about VaYetze. She was up and waiting for me in a chair. As we talked about Yaacov and the Angel; about their wrestling match and about the Angel dislocating Yaacov’s hip, her ears perked up and she asked me more about the wrestling Angel. Her curiosity peaked when we discussed how Yaacov, who was born on his brother’s heel, who was not a sportsman, nor a hunter, but was a bit, shall we say, conniving, straightened out just as the Angel dislocated his hip. She asked me if I could come back the next day, and I told her that I could see her on Wednesday, because I was set to teach Hebrew High on Tuesday night. She told me that she’d wait for me, and she did.

‘You’re late,” she exclaimed, as I entered her room. And then her smile subsided and she asked me to sit down. She was as lucid on Wednesday as she was on Sunday and Monday. She was aware and she was awake, and as her face became concerned, she said “I need to settle up with your boss. How can I do that?”

Rosalyn proceeded for the next two hours to tell me that the reason that her husband took her out to eat every day was because she refused to cook for him; that the reason he had bought her new clothes each week was because she would yell and scream if he hadn’t; how she had not spoken with her sister in over seventy years, and how she had another daughter that she had not spoken to in fifty.

She told me that the family moved to Long Island because she alienated everyone in the building and the reason for moving later to Las Vegas, and then to Arizona, was due to much of the same. “I was not always this nice old lady you have come to know, Rabbi Honey. I was a mean, evil woman, and when I die, not one person will come to my funeral. How do I settle up with your boss?” she asked. “I want to go dancing with my husband.”

I told her that she had already settled up; that she was good to go. I told her that all she had to do was to close her eyes and tell G-d that she was ready, and as soon as she did that, G-d would send the first Angel that he could to come and get her. He would tap her shoulder and in an instant, she would be dancing with her husband. And then she asked me the big question: Will I have to wrestle with the Angel?

I received the phone call at 9:30 the next morning that at 10:00 that night, Rosalyn had gone to sleep, and when the nurse checked in on her at 10:05, she was gone. Her daughter called me and asked me to perform the service on Friday afternoon, and I, of course, agreed. The only people there were her daughter and her daughter’s daughter (and her two young children), whom Rosalyn had never met.

After the family had left, the mortician approached me and asked me about the business with not bending her, or not breaking her back. “She was straight as the day she was born”, he told me. “No broken fingers; no mangled legs or arms; No curved spine.” Maybe she met Jacob’s Angel, I thought.

That night I attended Shabbat services at the Reform Congregation where I taught this year. The Cantor was playing a guitar, there was a drummer and a guitarist, and the room was filled with so much Ruach and spirit that I was amazed. As I looked around the Sanctuary, I started to think about the question posed to me and my initial conclusion that only those trained in Hebrew should learn Torah. I began to count. How many of the people here that are so enjoying Shabbat will ever learn enough Hebrew to study Torah properly? Four out of three hundred? Three? Five? Immediately I had my answer.

Following Shabbat I opened up my JPS TaNaCH and looked at Bereshit. It read: בראשית ברא אלקים את השמים ואת הארץ. I thought, and looked at the first word: בראשית. And I looked at it again. And again. And again. What is the real shoresh, I thought to myself. What is the real root? Is it ברא from “create”? Or is it ראש from “head” or “top”?

Now I had the real conclusion to this question. It is a living Torah. What we read today may not be what we read tomorrow. What we understood last week will be different next year and the next, and that is what makes Torah so beautiful. We can all read it as we will, and understand it as we will, and nobody is ever wrong. The key is in understanding that we may not ever understand. The beauty is in knowing that as we grow, so does Torah.

I had occasion to speak with Rabbi Silverman, Cantor Gole and Mr. Mermel over the last few days. Each of them echoed what I already knew: that my father and grandfather are smiling down on me as I accept Smicha.

I once was asked to describe how I would teach Torah, from the beginning of Bereshit to the end of Devarim. Now I know. One mitzvah at a time.

From the MIdbar that we call Arizona...

Ahavah u'Vrachot - Love and Blessings,

--Rabbi Alan Abrams

Sorry, all.... Dropping the ball.

2009-07-20T22:31:00.000-07:00

I apologize for having been somewhet absent... Look for more in the next few days!

--Alan

Absolutely Faithful

2009-06-21T01:05:00.000-07:00

The below is a sermon that I delivered a week ago. I believe it important enough to publish as part of this series.

It had been announced that President Obama would quote these words in his address to Moslem Countries while in Cairo this week. These words were to have appeared around the six minute mark of his speech, and were to resonate throughout his address and set the tone for his address, billed as “The Most Important Presentation from the United States to the Moslem States… Ever”. The statement that was to have been read is:
“A Jewish state must be absolutely faithful to the Land of Israel -- the Land that was promised in its Biblical borders to the Fathers of the Nation by the Creator of the world -- and includes the understanding of the positive connection between the Land and the ability of the Nation of Israel to fulfill its earthly goals”.

These words, attributed to the Manhigut Yehidit, the Jewish Leadership Movement, headed by Moshe Feiglin ring true today as they would have if written thousands of years ago, must be taken as serious words.

“A Jewish state must be absolutely faithful to the Land of Israel…”
What does this mean to us? To me, this means that Israel stands where Israel is. We will not move away. We will not abandon our homeland. We will not abandon our “moledet”. And – ERETZ YISRAEL IS OUR MOLEDET. Not Uganda. Not South America. Not somewhere in the middle of the Sudan, as others have suggested, but להיות עם חפשי בארצינו, ארץ ציון ירושלים. To be a FREE PEOPLE in OUR LAND, the land of Israel.

Chaverai—These words are not the problem. That the President never said these words, or that they somehow managed to magically disappear from his speech are not the problem. The problem is, yedidai—The problem is, my friends, that these words were advertised to be addressed TO the Moslem World, FROM the President of the United States, and they were not.
They certainly were NOT at the 6 minute mark, nor at the 16 minute mark; nor at the 20 minutes mark. At the 24 minute mark, he gives us credit for a little under a minute. He mentions that we have suffered as a people. That we survived the Shoah. That we have been persecuted. And? IMMEDIATELY he switches sides and for the next seven minutes, talks about how the "Palestinians" are mistreated, persecuted, their land taken, and finally, how a State of their own is an absolute necessity.

Maybe it is. Maybe it is a necessity. Is it? I don’t know, really. The Arab residents of the region were handed land by the English in 1919. It was called TransJordan. A piece of land four times the size of the land offered us by the King’s throne. In 1922, the British reestablished borders and they received more land. In 1948, upon our Declaration of Independence they received yet more land. And continued to attack us in both organized military exercises in 1956 across the Suez; in forcing us to cause a pre-emptive attack in 1967, where, by the grace of G-d, their campaign was stopped in its tracks and we gained land in the Sinai, Gaza, Yehuda and The Shomron (Judah and Samaria) and the Golan Heights, vital to our survival as under our control, terrorists and snipers are unable to sit on a hill and fire bullets into our school yards and Kibbutzim.

In 1973, while we davened in Betei Knesset—While some of you sat in the EXACT spot where you now sit, we were brutally attacked as we prayed in silence and asked G-d שמע קןלנו. Hear our Voices. Please.

"A Jewish state must be absolutely faithful to the Land of Israel -- the Land that was promised in its Biblical borders to the Fathers of the Nation by the Creator of the world -- and includes the understanding of the positive connection between the Land and the ability of the Nation of Israel to fulfill its earthly goals -. "

This, chaverai. This is vital that we understand: Israel was not granted the opportunity to declare independence because of the Shoah; This was NOT our reconciliation gift – This land – OUR land, was promised in its Biblical borders to the Fathers of the Nation by the Creator of the world. Period. And now, now the responsibility is upon US to keep our land as להיות עם חפשי בארצינו. As a FREE PEOPLE IN OUR LAND, for HAD ISRAEL BEEN ESTABLISHED PRIOR TO THE SHOAH, THERE WOULD HAVE BEEN NO SHOAH. There would have been no Shoah. There would have been no Holocaust.

Let us close our eyes for but a moment; and imagine a world in which six million lives had been permitted to carry on. A world in which six million people would have married, and reproduced, nurtured maybe, another three million children, who would have married and brought to the world another… How many? In Poland alone, we now number LESS than 25,000. In Lithuania, there are less than 4,000 Jews left.

In Eretz Yisrael, we number 5,593,000. And we are still too few.

There is… There is room for all of us. Even if it is for just a short time. A week, two? A month? A summer? A winter? Then maybe 6 months out of the year? Maybe a year?? Maybe a lifetime???

A few weeks ago, the Shabbat following Yom HaAtzmaut, we discussed our hope. תקותינו. We discussed how after all of these years we have yet to lose our hope. And now I ask you… I ask you to be absolutely faithful. We must be absolutely faithful to the Land of Israel; We must be absolutely faithful to G-d, and in turn, we must be absolutely faithful to our families and loved ones, our Synagogues, Churches or any place where we find ease in addressing and performing our service of belief. Most of all, we must be. We need to be, we strive to be and we absolutely MUST BE faithful to our faith.

And, faithful to ourselves. For, G-d, הקדוש ברוך הוא, has faith in us.

I wish you a good week. Shavuah tov from the Midbar that we call Arizona...

Ahavah u'Vrachot... Peace and Blessings,

--Alan

Apologies, Teshuvuah, Slichot and Forgiveness Requested

2009-06-03T02:59:00.000-07:00

Once every so often, and lately more than I would like to be the case, I find myself asking for Slichot, for forgiveness for doing something out of character, saying something that could have hurt someone, acting a certain way that is not in line with who I am supposed to be, or whom I am thought that I must be to work in my chosen field, or even, to be considered a good Jew.

I find myself now again in that situation over a post or two on this blog from last week, where I once again proved myself to be... Human. And in being "human", I felt emotion(s). In this instance, I felt anger, frustration, misdirection, sadness, betrayal and most of all, I felt that some around me were apathetic to a situation that I believe, we care about with similar emotion and importance.

Yet, last week, I blew it. Plain and simple. The situation is not really that important - well, it is, but not something to hash and rehash, especially when the result will not change.

I felt slighted, as did many people who knew what had happened and I reacted. Without thinking and in using this forum, I reacted, which caused more than a few heads to turn, and without even naming names, I was accused of naming names, outing and embarrassing individuals that were not named, nor outed, nor by innuendo even mentioned. Apparently they believe otherwise, so I accept it. So be it. I made a mistake.

I now ask forgiveness, slichot and intend on doing Teshuvah to repent and atone. This, is a given. My question, and my real problem in all of this is, and seriously, not to be glib, but to ask for my own personal knowledge in an attempt to learn: At what point are we permitted to be human? And, if such a point exists, how human are we permitted to be? As Rabbanim, as Judaic and Torah Educators (we are obviously held to higher standards), but at what point, if any, are we permitted to say: HOLD ON, WE HAVE RIGHTS ALSO?

In retrospect, I assume that we have no real wiggle room here, as we constantly remain in a position of believing that we must please everyone all of the time. And that, my friends is okay. Just as long as I know the ground rules.

So, at this point, and in all sincerity, I ask for the forgiveness of anyone that I may have slighted in my post of Thursday, or of last week, three weeks ago, last year, yesterday or today, for that matter. I am sorry. This early in the game, I am going to be human. Maybe more than you would prefer, and for this I apologize.

During my first experience with a Congregant who had passed away in my presence, I had a very difficult discussion with my Rabbi, my dear friend and mentor and asked him if this - if death, gets any easier. He answered pointedly and truthfully. He said, "I hope not." I agreed.

I first apologize for being human and making human mistakes. I apologize for writing (speaking) without thinking it through and cooling off, and I apologize if any one person feels singled out due to my writings of last week.

I also thank you, however, for allowing me to be human. Otherwise, I could not feel what you need for me to feel, when you need for me to feel it.

Ahava u'Vrachot...

--Alan

An Open Letter to my Friend, Teacher and Rav

2009-05-30T23:18:00.000-07:00

I write this open letter with a heavy heart, but also with hearty congratulations to my good friend Elon Sunshine, who has, in the past three years become my teacher, mentor, Rav and friend. Without him having asked if I wanted to live on September 10, 2007, and allowing G-d to hear my answer, I would not be here today to give daily thanks for my second chance at life on Olam haZeh, nor would I be here today to try and bring Torah to others as he has to me.

Dearest Rabbi Sunshine:

When we first met three years ago at a Break the Fast dinner in Scottsdale and shared a table over eggs and OJ, I had a feeling that we would become good friends. Never in my wildest imagination, would I have believed that we would share a journey as we have, and never would I have ever dreamt that we would move separately to similar places, both in life and in career.

I will always cherish our study sessions in your office at HZ, wherein I would come up with what I believed was an important lesson in Torah and your reply was something like "So What? You never thought of that before?" Your level and simple understanding and pure acceptance of Torah and Talmud made me want to work harder, think harder and learn more and more. Especially with you.

I remember one afternoon that you visited me in the hospital during my recuperation from Multi-System Failure and we discussed that past two months that I had missed. You then took out a paper from your pocket and we studied Talmud together. You knew exactly what part of Mishna to bring me; Not too easy, but not too challenging for my half-baked brain.

We have shared many a meal at Scottsdale Kosher and a few more while rushing off to teach at Hebrew High. You have trusted me with your students and I have enjoyed teaching them almost as much as I have enjoyed learning from you.

My fondest memories, though, are your officiating at Tyler's Bar Mitzvah last March, and this past year during the High Holidays. It was not only my distinct pleasure, but an honour to have shared your Pulpit.

I am so very sorry to see you leave Phoenix. It pains me to know that it may be a long time before we share another meal; another joke or another class. And as hard as it was to say goodbye this afternoon, it is even harder to write goodbye tonight. It is indeed difficult when the writer has few words. In truth, there are no words that even begin to thank you for all that you have done these past three years.

It is said that as one closes, others open; For you, a very deserving Congregation awaits in the *San Francisco Bay Area, and for me, my teaching of Torah will continue in Los Angeles. I suppose that an hour flight isn't really that far away.

I know not how to close, other than with words from another writer. One from whom we have all learned a great deal, Bob Dylan:

May God bless and keep you always; May your wishes all come true; May you always do for others, And let others do for you; May you build a ladder to the stars, And climb on every rung; May you stay forever young.

Elon, I thank you from the very bottom of my heart. I will miss seeing you in Shul and will love you always.

Ahavah u'Vrachot

--Alan

*Rabbi Elon Sunshine has been blessed with the task of serving Congregation B'nai Shalom in Walnut Creek, California. If you are ever in the area, be sure to look him up.

Winners, Losers and Other Strangers

2009-05-28T16:07:00.000-07:00

As it has been a while since my last posting, I feel the need, some need anyway, to explain my brief absence before moving to today's banter, which I am calling: WINNERS, LOSERS and OTHER STRANGERS.

You see, since my return from death sixteen months ago, and my return from Israel in March, where I learned what "living" is really all about, as opposed to simply "existing", I have tried my best to keep to myself about certain issues and instances that annoy me, or make me happier, for reasons of following the most desirous of all Jewish Mitzvot, or Commandments, those having to do with what we call, "Lashon HaRa", or Evil Tongue. All the while, in doing so, I have been pretty much forced to look out of State for work, and have been commuting between Arizona and California almost bi-weekly since Pesach (Passover) time.

As hard as it is to not, we all do it, speak with an evil tongue, that is, even when we don't mean to, and even when we try so hard to hold our emotions, eventually, we will fall back and speak out of school about someone. Halakha, Jewish Law does, however, permit us to vent, once, and part of my writing today might just seem like I am venting. Anything said in a negative manner, albeit the absolute truth, will be said without naming names - For you to whom these ventilation's are directed, know exactly who you are, and more precisely, exactly why I am venting.

Initially, though, I'd like to start with a few of the positives and address some winners.

WINNER: JONATHAN COOGAN - Jonathan is an old High School buddy who has worked his tail off in the entertainment business for years and years, and has finally gotten a huge, gigantic push with his brilliant one man show, I'll Give You Something To Cry About". Billed as "An Addictive Comedy", his show is currently playing at The Beverly Hills Playhouse in the Los Angeles area. Check http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#/event.php?eid=89771388351&ref=mf for details. Do NOT miss this show.

WINNERS: RABBI RICHARD CAMRAS and CANTOR RON SNOW - Rabbi Camras and I actually began Hebrew School together at Sinai Temple in Los Angeles when we were maybe 5 or six years old. Now the Senior Rabbi at Shomrei Torah Synagogue (http://www.shomreitorahsynagogue.org/), he along with the Valley's "Coolest Cantor", Ron Snow have brought something amazingly special to the San Fernando Valley. With programming for anyone and everyone, it is simply a wonderful place to be on any Shabbat or Holiday.

WINNER - EXTRA SPECIAL WINNER: KELLEY ALEXANDER, SUPERMOM - You may remember a piece that I wrote back in January about a very talented television writer by the name of Del Shores. He is also a winner this week, but before we get to Del, I need to tell you about Kelley. If you have an encyclopedia handy, please look up FANTASTIC SINGLE MOMS and you will see her picture and caption right on top. Actually, you won't because Kelley is the sort of person who would never seek attention for doing what she does best, being a mom to two delightful teenage daughters, who through much adversity have managed to not only keep a sense of humour about them, but bring home good grades and are star softball players.

The main reason that I bring up Kelley (because she would never allow me to boast about her) is that I learned recently that she is in a competition to begin airing on HGTV this weekend. The show, "The $250,000 Challenge" to air this Sunday at 10/9c! HGTV is giving 5 families in one neighborhood a shot at what everyone wants right now…a quarter of a million dollars! But they’ll have to cut through the competition, in the ultimate home renovation contest, to claim it!If you’ve ever dreamed about paying down your mortgage, peace of mind, or being king of the neighborhood…then you know dreams go along way, but don’t come easy! http://www.hgtv.com/hgtvs-250000-challenge/show/index.html. You can also text keyword HGTV250 to 44881 to be reminded to tune in on Sundays 10/9c. GO KELLEY!!!

If anyone deserves to be a fan favorite, Kelley does. In and of themselves, single moms are tough cookies. They have the hardest job in the world and usually get very little support. This is our chance to support one of the best around.

WINNER: CHANA LURIA - Another super Single Mom with much on her plate, including caring for two wonderful teenagers, fighting an unjust JDS (Jewish Day School) administration (see below under LOSERS), and trying to stay cancer free. (If you see Chana on Facebook, say hello and let her know that you support her 100%). Our prayers are with you, Chanaleh. May you go from Strength to Strength.

COLLECTIVE WINNERS: SINGLE MOMS EVERYWHERE - Please do not feel slighted. You also make this cut, but if I tried to name all of you (that I know, even), we would run out of web space!

WINNERS: KENNETH VonHOPF, GELIE AKHENBLIT and AUSTIN FELDMAN - Network marketers who seem to have a knack for bringing people together. In these difficult times, your groups and vision of business future helps us all.

LOSERS: MAJOR PHOENIX AREA BANKS - who would rather alienate potential customers by charging a person $6 to cash a $20 dollar check. What happened to CUSTOMER SERVICE? It appears gone forever.

WINNER: FAIRFAX HIGH SCHOOL - in Los Angeles by electing, get this, a MALE PROM QUEEN! Only in LA. Only at Fairfax! That building at the corner of Melrose and Fairfax is still an interesting place. Amazing.

WINNER: DEL SHORES - the brilliantly award winning writer and creator of SORDID LIVES, who was able to pick himself up after getting an axe from a backstabbing Cable Network by taking his show on the road to sell out audiences all over the Country. For more info, check out http://www.facebook.com/notifications.php#/event.php?eid=79892606909&ref=mf.

LOSERS: THE JEWISH COMMUNITY OF PHOENIX, ARIZONA - whom, according to statistics reported recently, place the Jewish population of the Valley of the Sun at over 100,000, yet far less than TEN PERCENT is affiliated with a Synagogue. If we are really 100,000 strong, where are we?

WINNERS: THE JEWISH COMMUNITY OF GREATER LOS ANGELES - whom in the last ten years have grown significantly in both the City and the Valley and caused Los Angeles to become the largest observant Jewish Community in the World. I am amazed and proud.

LOSER: THE LARGEST JEWISH COMMUNITY DAY SCHOOL IN SAN DIEGO - who for no known reason whatsoever believes that they can bully a family into leaving the school after many years of family support. Here's the worst part, they can get away with it, and they ARE getting away with it. This school believes in Torah Judaism? Right..........

WINNERS: MY FAMILY - for putting up with me these past (almost) two years as I work toward Ordination, and for understanding why I must move to be of service to a Jewish Community elsewhere while there is no Judaic work here. Thank you, and I love you.

OTHER STRANGERS: ARE JUST - friends whom we have yet to meet.

As I write this afternoon, we are on the bridge of Shavuot, when each of us readies ourselves to once again meet at Sinai to accept G-d's Torah. May we all remember that without it, our lives lack direction. May we remember that the richest people are those who are happy with what they possess and may we each remember that we are lucky to have each other.

Chag Shavuot Sameach.

Ahava u'Vrachot, with love and blessings...

--Alan

Building Walls and Hiding behind them

2009-05-17T02:59:00.000-07:00

Earlier on Friday, just before Shabbat, a friend of mine, who happens to be an absolutely terrifically talented writer, asked me why it seems that she writes her best pieces when she feels Divine Inspiration, (understandable), and why it seems (to her) that she can only be truly inspired when she completely lets go of emotion and physical being.

We discussed the inner אור התורה , the Light of Torah that we all possess, and we discussed the possibilities that the walls of self defense that we all seem to build around ourselves may be getting in the way of our allowing ourselves to feel G-d's light. And then we discussed how it may have been for our Forefathers - Our ancestors, Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, and so forth.

What did they have to do see G-d's light? Did they have walls to tear down? They clearly had episodes of non-belief; Times in which they acted in not the most "Holy" of ways, and for one reason, and one reason alone, they were able to repent and again find favor in the eyes of G-d: They were human. Humans make mistakes. Jacob deceived his brother to gain a Birthright; Moses lost his temper (on more than one occasion); Aaron helped in the construction of the golden calf.

When these scenarios were brought up to my friend the writer, who happens to be a very serious Baalat Teshuvah, she literally flipped! I had not been called so many names since I stood in nets at Joe Louis Arena and tried to stop 100MPH spheres of galvanized rubber with my body! All because I had the audacity to refer to our Torah Heroes as "HUMAN".

Just about thirty-eight or so days ago, as we all sat at our respective Seder tables and read from our Hagadot, we recalled how Rabbi Hillel in a discussion with a potential Conversion student told the young man that the basic idea of Torah is to treat others as you would wish to be treated, and to not cause a happening which you hate to be bestowed on another. This, of course has been called by many names, the most popular of which is "The Golden Rule".

Let's take a look at this "Golden Rule", shall we? Do unto others, as you would..., right?

How do the following play into the "Golden Rule"?

1. Lashon HaRa - According to Wikipedia, Lashon HaRa is is the prohibition in Jewish Law of telling gossip. We all do it, right? Gossip? We try not to, but let's be serious. We all need to work on this one in order to follow the "GR".

2. Road Rage - Do you have "Road Rage"? Do you get upset at other drivers who might not be as agile behind the wheel as you are? When was the last time you showed that middle finger to the Jerk in the 2.5 ton Ford Pick-'Em-Up with the souped up wheels? You and I would need a ladder just to get into the cab, right? Let's cut the guy some slack. He is the knucklehead having to fill up every other day at $75 bucks a pop! I think that he's secretly jealous of our Priuses.

3. The Non-Member Know-It-All-Snowbird Minyanaire who complains about everything - We all have one of these guys, right? He shows up around Thanksgiving and leaves after Mothers' Day. He means well, but does he ever put a Dollar or even a Quarter into the Pushke? He doesn't really rate in this quiz, but he's annoying, and at 2am on a Sunday, annoying works for me. I think the way to help this guy understand the "GR" is to kill him with kindness. Then, the next time we see him, and for the balance of his stay, have our kids put membership packets on his windshield!

4. The Phone Message, Text Message, E-Mail Message receiver, who will NOT reply to us, unless he or she wants something FROM us - This one is tricky, as it always brings us into the "GR" Zone. I actually find these folks the rudest of them all. Believe you , me--- When they want from US, they call, SMS, Page, E-Mail and call again. They find us on FaceBook, MySpace, Twitter, Spitter... They find us in the bath tub, at the Yankees game, at a movie while we are buying popcorn--- They even find us in Shul! Of course, since we are all steadfast believers of the "GR", we actually ANSWER our phones and e-mails! Do they? NEVER! How do we fix this? Well... Unfortunately, I believe the only way to deal with the "Non-Caller-Backer", is to play his game right back at him. Of course, it probably won't work, because we are more courteous in that regard.

5. And finally, last, but certainly not least, our friends who are so into this new thing (to them) called "Yiddishkeit", that all of their Halakhic Rules come straight from Reb Yussel (if your name is Reb Yussel, apologies in advance, you are supposed to be fictional) who engrains into their head facts like how many times one is supposed to pray for this or that on a day when the sun comes up 1.4 minutes later than expected. Heaven forbid that WE tell them otherwise... We will become instant heretics and forever be branded Anti-Semetic. In these cases, how may we hold onto the "GR"? We don't. We leave well enough alone, and when they find their own way back and into our Shuls and Communities, we can teach them what our vision of Love for Ohr HaTorah in our hearts and minds.

Which brings us back to the topic of walls. Defensive walls; Offensive walls; Why do we build them? Why do we hide behind them? Maybe, just maybe we do, because we are afraid of facing others who may not practice the "GR" as we would like, and if we build a wall to keep their thoughts from connecting with our emotions, we feel ourselves safe.

What we must, however, remember, is that as long as our walls are up, we will have a harder time connecting with G-d and with the Ohr HaTorah that resides in each of us.

As we mature, our light at times brightens; and on occasion it fades, but never does it leave us. It rests within us, and calls upon us to ask for guidance, which it is more than happy to provide.

From the Midbar that we call Arizona, I wish you all Shavuah Tov.

Ahavah u'Vrachot...

--Alan

It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year

2009-04-07T20:27:00.000-07:00

This is the most wonderful time of the year. Not December!

Seriously, it is. Baseball has begun another season. For real. No more Spring Training games with guys wearing numbers like 64 and 78, as impressive as they try to be, we all know that Billy Bob Whatshisname from Grover's Point, Indiana is headed for AA ball in Akron, and that the real reason that our star outfielder wasn't in the line up against the Giants in Scottsdale last week is because he did not trust anyone else to drive his Bentley back to Los Angeles. Spring Training is great, but after six weeks of Minor League games, it is time to play for real. And that they are.

Meanwhile in Scottsdale, it is painfully obvious that nothing has changed. To wit:

I had to skillfully park my Prius today at the coffee place because some Las Vegas Tan 60 year old guy in shorts and a button-down left his $300,000 orange Lamborghini in one and a half parking spaces. I suppose that, in and of itself, is sort of rude anyway, but in FRONT of a place where most people are working on perfecting their resumes? That is just plain "Scottsdale".

I am really not complaining, Per Se, but certain things are just annoying.

A few things in Scottsdale that annoy not:

* Debra (DK) Hillard is an amazing and brilliant artist. Both on canvas and in print. Watch for her. Her work is simply from the heart, moving and incredible.

* Jewish Day Schools in the Phoenix/Scottsdale are a wonderful thing to have available to the community. If you are here, please support them. If we don't teach our children, who will? http://www.thekingdavidschool.org/ and http://www.pardesschool.org/ are both K-8 and do a terrific job.

* All above Spring Training rhetoric aside, the San Francisco Giants' facility is top notch. If you are ever in the area in March, you will want to spend an afternoon. Or three.

* And then there is Hazzan Bernard Savitz. Cantor Savitz is all he should be and more. He is warm, caring, and Heymishe. If you have to ask what Heymishe means, it means exactly how it sounds. Humble, warm and open. Hazzan Bernie was honored at Har Zion a few weeks ago. His contributions on a daily basis to our community are too great in number to begin to recall. Way to go, Bern. Yaasher Koach. May you go from Strength to Strength.Back on topic. This really the most wonderful time of the year. The grass is green, the flowers bloom and the world is renewed in its splendor of creation and re-creation.

And-- It is Passover Time.

To coin a phrase (as if I never have done that before), a long long time ago, I can still remember... Searching the house for "chometz" (leavened breads) during Passover! We are supposed to, and in fact, commanded to do this search before the holiday, and dispose of any leavened breads found, and we did that; Goose/Duck Feather and Wood Spoon and all, but this search, or these searches, were performed during the holiday. In secret. A sort of clandestine sibling operation from year to year. So deprived were my sisters and I of things like Pop-Tarts and Twinkies and, oh the humanity, pink and white sugar covered animal cookies! So deprived were we for EIGHT WHOLE DAYS, that we had, but one mission in life.... FIND CHOMETZ!

Once found, and find it, we would, we would not eat it!! We "dasn't"!!! We should not, could not, would not, under any circumstances eat that Pop-Tart! It, along with countless other boxes of forbidden fruit (breads) would hide in boxes under the pool table, or in our father's wood-work shop in the garage, or under a sheet at the bottom of a closet. And it would stay there. Right up until day eight, seven o'clock pm.

Back then, our Seders (directly translated as 'order', known as the Passover Dinner(s)) were very different from the first night to the second. The first night was always held at my great grandparents' apartment on South Sherbourne Drive, between Cashio and Pico. The grown-ups would rattle through the "Haggadah" (Passover Liturgy, directly translated as 'story'), all in a never to be understood form of Hebrew with a Czech/Hungarian flair, that even today, I would have trouble following; Pass horrid smelling hard boiled eggs and boiled potatoes across the table; Feebly sing several verses of "Dayenu" and then, around 9:00, we would eat- and the food was always burnt. Then, the grown-ups would fight. With themselves, with each other, with whomever. The arguing was so incessant, that it became commonplace.

We would, though, taste Pesach. We would be indoctrinated into Passover from the age of infancy and begin to understand what the holiday means to us.

The second night used to belong to my father's parents and was similar to the first night as to menu and palatability of said menu. The neighborhood was the same - Night two was at Wooster and Cashio; but the second Seder was very different in every other regard. My grandfather, Louis Abrams would sit at the head of the table and rather than the 'normal' custom of the youngest at the table asking "Why is this night different than all other nights"... He would ask the question of us kids and let us answer with the knowledge that we had gained from Hebrew and Sunday school. He would then, elaborate and answer all of our questions with others and transform an otherwise boring night (see the first night above) into a magical wonder world of knowledge and love of our heritage. When we lost him in 1971, we lost a great man. A quiet, great man.

From then on, the second Seder was held at our house. And my dad planned it out. I mean, for weeks before Passover my dad, Haggadah in hand would plan who read what. Who would read the English; Who would read the Hebrew; Who would say the blessing for the first cup of wine; the second; the matzo - It was planned out like any first rate, first class choreographed production. And, it was exciting. Us kids, and our cousins and our friends competed for parts.

My dad's Seders gave us more meaning than we had experienced before. It was magic. This will be our second Pesach without him. It is his absence of physical presence that I will always miss the most.

As the years passed, and table locations changed from my grandparents home to my parents', and several years ago, to my home, the older traditions have been replaced with new ones, and the new traditions have been replaced with even newer ones, but the central message remains the same: עבדים היינו לפרעה במצרים. We were slaves to Pharaoh in Egypt, and the L-rd, our G-d, took us out from there with a strong hand and with an outstretched arm. If the Holy One, blessed be He, had not taken our fathers out of Egypt, then we, our children and our children's children would have remained enslaved to Pharaoh in Egypt.

These words have not changed. Year after year, we remember the words of the Haggadah which tells us that In every generation a person is obligated to regard himself as if he had come out of Egypt, as it is said: "You shall tell your child on that day, it is because of this that the L-rd did for me when I left Egypt."

As the main focus of our heritage reminds us, we must teach our children. This is the true beauty of Pesach. The true meaning of Passover for me.

This year from the Midbar; From the desert which is Arizona, I wish you all Chag Kasher v'Sameach. A very Happy and Kosher Passover holiday.

With Love and Blessings, Ahavah u'Vrachot...

Next year in Jerusalem!

--Alan

P.S. - Post (Trip) Script

2009-03-19T17:00:00.000-07:00

With Purim and Shushan Purim over and done, and lacking several hours of sleep, Continental flight 85 left Ben Gurion Airport right on time last Wednesday. At 10:20am, we blew down the runway and into the air we went.

Unlike the outbound flight that brought me back to Eretz Yisrael two weeks before, the flight back to Newark was relatively empty, and very quiet. The energy that engulfed every millimeter of space while on our way to The Holy Land was now spent and thoughts of returning "Artza" were on all minds as we together spent the next thirteen and a half hours pushing headwinds toward New York City.

The food was good. The movies and television shows, abundant on individual TV screens that jettisoned from armrests, and sleep--- After two full days of Purim in Israel, sleep came easily.

What did not come easily, though, was the ability to discard the feeling of loss. The longing to tell the flight crew that we had all made a mistake in boarding, and would they--- Could they, please turn back and drop us off?

It is not that I am unhappy to be back in the States. On the contrary. I am thrilled to be with my family; To tell them about the Angel that I encountered in Jerusalem; The Karaoke Singing Rabbinical Students; Hannah's Bat Mitzvah; Purim, and the list continues... The loss, or feeling of loss happens to us all when we leave Israel. The experience that we just lived cannot be replicated anywhere on earth, and we know it. And we know, that we will carry with us a certain emptiness until we return.

It is this emptiness that is bittersweet. Bitter in that we have left a place which truly is our home of homes, and at the same time sweet for the same reason.

I believe that Thomas Wolfe was wrong when he penned, "You can't go home again". You can. And airlines leave every day from a city near you.

I was going to stop here, but I cannot do that. There is much more to say.

You can go home again (see above). Not only can you, but you must. We must. We must not forget that we have a home.

Even as this tiny country, the size of New Jersey is surrounded by millions of hostile individuals on three sides and by the Mediterranean Sea on the fourth, we need remember that this is our home, and we are obligated to protect her and to return to her.

We are obligated to protect her borders and to protect her citizenry. As her borders are our borders and her citizenry is עם ישראל. The Nation of Israel. It is written that when G-d gave the Torah to Israel, All of Israel was present at Sinai. This means that you were there, and so was I.

Our obligation does not end by taking a trip and playing tourist. Our obligation does not end by buying an Israel Bond, or donating Tzedaka to JNF (these are nice things to do, but...) Our obligation does not end by saying לשנה הבאה בירושלים during the Pesach Seder; Our obligation simply, does not end. Period.

Our obligation does not end, because Israel's obligation to us, does not end. Nor will it end, ever. It cannot end, and nor can our obligation to her end, for in the names of the Six Million of our Brethren who perished at the hands of the Nazis some sixty years ago, and the unnamed Millions who, during the course of the last three thousand years gave their lives for the sake of G-d's name, our obligation remains solid and unanamous. And so it should.

The following prayer is recited daily in Israel. Let us make it part of our daily prayers as well.

תפילה לחיילים
מִי שֶׁבֵּרַךְ אֲבוֹתֵינוּ וְאִמּוֹתֵינוּ הוּא יבָרֵךְ אֶת חַיָּלֵי צְבָא הֲגַנָּה לְיִשְׂרָאֵל, מְגִנֵּי אֶרֶץ קָדְשֵׁנוּ. הַקָּדוֹשׁ בָּרוּךְ הוּא יִשְׁמֹר וְיַצִּיל אֶת חַיָּלֵינוּ וְחַיָּלוֹתֵינוּ מִכָּל צָרָה וְצוּקָה וּמִכָּל נֶגַע וּמַחֲלָה, וְיִשְׁלַח בְּרָכָה וְהַצְלָחָה בְּכָל מַעֲשֵׂה יְדֵיהֶם, רְפוּאָה שְׁלֵמָה לְכָל חוֹלֵיהֶם וּפְצוּעֵיהֶם, וְיִפְדֶּה בִּמְהֵרָה אֶת שְׁבוּיֵיהֶם. וְנֹאמַר אָמֵן.

“May he who blessed our ancestors, Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, bless the soldiers of the Israel Defense forces and the security personnel who stand guard over our country and the cities of our God, from the Lebanese border to the Egyptian wilderness and from the Mediterranean Sea to the edges of the desert – or wherever they might be – on land, in the air or at sea.“May God cause our enemies who attack us to suffer defeat at the hands of our troops. May the Holy One, may He be blessed, shield and protect them from any adversity or anguish, any ordeal or suffering, and send blessing and success to everything they do. May He bring those who hate us under their sway, and glorify our forces with the crown of salvation and the mantle of victory, so that the verse: ‘The Lord your God marches with you to do battle for you against your enemies and to save you,’ will be fulfilled through them; and let us say, Amen.”

In addition, I thank you for including Gilad ben Aviva v'Noam Shalit in your prayers. He has been away from us for 999 days. May G-d return him to us in good health and good spirit.

From the Golah - The Diaspora, outside of our Home in Eretz Yisrael, I bid you good evening.

Ahavah u'Vrachot...
Love and blessings...

--Alan

From the bottom of my heart, thank you to...

Erez B, Barry and Debby, Barry, Dave and Diane, Karen and Roni (double thanks), R'sCM, MB, RP, JR, BBM; of course HBS, Craig, Susan, Cindy and Andy, Gal, Guy, Mary, Alex and all my wonderful friends from HZ; Everyone from Herzl 75/76--- Miri, Roni, Liza - Mily and Amir (triple thanks - great food!) and others who wish to remain even more anonymous (MF); to Jay, Jill, Hannah and Eve, without you, it wouldn't have happened at all; and of course to my loving family- S, S, Z, D & T. Your love and support is a blessing in and of itself. Lest I forget, MLA and CWS, DLAOA and TBABAL. תודה רבה רבה.
AA

Purim isn’t really Purim until you celebrate in Israel!

2009-03-12T23:51:00.000-07:00

A few years ago, when the Jewish Federation of Greater Phoenix decided to hold a Communitywide Purim Celebration at the Ida Levine Campus of The Jewish Community Center. The idea was to bring the entire community together, and instead of local Synagogues each staging their own “Carnivals”, to have one big party. Well—It worked. For me, it worked, anyway, until I spent 48 straight hours in what I now call “The Purim Zone.”

Let’s talk about Purim for a moment: Persian King Ahashveros throws a party for all his drunk friends and asks his beautiful wife, Queen Vashti to strip for his buddies. She refuses and he sends her away in exile. In seeking a new wife to become Queen, the lovely Esther, a secular Jewess, and niece of Mordechai answers the call and has no qualms in letting her gowns fall by the wayside in the name of personal progress. (This woman is our heroine?)

Meanwhile, Haman, whose name is so villainous that we try to drown it out with moree and more noise every time his name is mentioned, plans a coup of the King and at the same time, plans to kill all of the Jews of Shushan. Mordechai gets word and alerts his niece who informs her King. Haman is hung and we (the Jewish People) dodge another bullet, sort to speak. Now we celebrate this “victory” ever y year, as it is written in the Book of Esther.

In the States, at least every State that I have lived in, Purim is really no big deal… A Shul Carnival with games like “Dunk the Rabbi”, or Ring Toss; Stale Homentaschen (three sided pastry usually filled with – poppy seed [yuck]) and lots of booze. Exactly where I would like to spend a sunny Sunday afternoon. Not.

For me, this year was a tad different! Purim blew into Tel Aviv on Monday at sundown with the “Megilla of Esther” being read in every street corner Synagogue. Noisemakers of every kind, shape and sound were used to drown out the wicked name of Haman; Ladies, Gentleman and Kids of all ages gathered together to read, sing, dance and truly celebrate this monument us day. And then? THEN the party, or shall I say parties, started. Every restaurant, bar, club, hotel, street, sidewalk or open area of Real Estate in Tel Aviv greeted revelers with abandon. Loud music could be heard into the streets and adjoining residential areas around the famous Allenby/Bialik intersection, and from Hayarkon Street, fireworks could be seen off the shore as far away as Yaffo southward and Ramat Aviv to the north of the city. One would have thought that it was Yom Haatzmaut, Israel’s Independence Day. Alcohol was free flowing – and the streets were full. We started out at Kehillat Sinai, the Conservative Synagogue of Tel Aviv, and our hosts for Hannah’s Bat Mitzvah a two days prior and continued to at least five venues before turning in at five o’clock in the morning.

And the best part, was that as a Walled City, Jerusalem celebrates Purim the next day, so I could spend my final day at home, back in my favorite place on earth, and celebrate Purim all over again, with different new friends and at another home-away-from-home Synagogue, Moreshet Yisrael, located next to the Conservative Yeshivah on Agron Street, a few blocks away from the wonders of Rehov Ben Yehudah.

The drive into Jerusalem was of course, very different this time in. On the way into town two weeks ago, I was driven by Sherut (a taxi-van with other passengers) and wasn’t able to pay real attention to the views of the City as we entered. It was also beginning to darken outside, which didn’t’ help. Monday, though, around 2:00pm, I arrived at the top of the hill and stared into the most beautiful city on the face of this earth. Jerusalem of Gold was certainly living up to her name, and while cold outside, the sun was shining, just as she would, and the magical City of David sparkled under her bright rays.

Charedi Black Hatted Jews walked in small groups to and fro, and with a certain intentional brisk pace, as if to say, “Don’t Start Purim without us”, and children followed. Taxis hurried here and there and there was an electricity in the air, unfelt by me in a long time. Despite being exhausted by Monday night’s events, I was recharged, and ready to get to Moreshet by the suggested time of 6:45. The Megilla reading would start at 7:30. And did it ever. And the parties in Jerusalem on Tuesday night? Another Purim night in Jerusalem!

--Tomorrow: Leaving our home for where my stuff is...

From David’s City of Gold, I wish for you…

Ahavah u’Vrachot…
Love and Blessings…

--Alan

Hannah Shoots-- Hannah SCORES!!!

2009-03-08T01:34:00.000-07:00

In the Book of Samuel, we learn that Hannah was given a double portion from G-d because he loved her. Today, (because of Shabbat), you get a double portion from me. Enjoy!

The Wimpel read: Hannah Z (we don't need last names, right?). was called to the Torah on Shabbat Mincha Ki-Tisa, 11 Adar, 5769, Kehillat Sinai, Tel Aviv, Israel. It was pink, light blue and white. Hannah's favorite colors, and handcrafted by Phoenix's world renowned Silkstress, Gina Richmann.

I have been working with Hannah since the beginning of the school year and last evening, we celebrated her Bat Mitzvah. She read beautifully from Parshat Ki-Tisa and gave a remarkable D'var Torah.

I thank her entire family for this opportunity to share in this Simcha and for being here these past days.

There is much more to say about Hannah's Bat Mitzvah, but right now, I am still in awe of this special day. I will, however, send some love. a HUGE thank you to Rabbi Roberto Arbib, Hazzan Barry Meislin and the entire staff at Kehillat Sinai. Barry, you were the perfect host. Rav Todot!

Quickie Morning Blog Blurb...

* Since when do tourists pay for electricity on top of room charges and taxes? I was asked to pay some NIS130.00 for electricity! $30.00? for ELECTRICITY? That is definitely going to happen. I am wondering if I am going to be charged for the water I used while flushing the toilet!?!

THE ENTERTAINMENT CORNER.....

* Here are a few names to look for, watch out for and keep your eyes and ears on - Shay Moshe- Moshe is a guitarist extraordinaire. Shay is a hip and amazingly energetic 25 year old, who sports dreadlocks and a crisp and sharp new sound. This kid is going places... Especially if he sticks with... Anat Ester Hitman. The only word I know to describe Anat in one word is WOW. Anat Ester is a wonderfully talented singer-songwriter who could be compared to some of the best of the best, but I won't. I can't. She is too good to be compared with the likes of Gali Atari, or Riki Gal, or Chava Alberstein... No. She is (advanced apologies to Gali, Riki or Chava if you are reading), in a word... Better.. She carries with her the innocence of age and the fortitude of experience. Anat Esther not only sings to the audience, she grabs them, strokes them and becomes one with them. The only entertainer that I have the ability to do this is Billy Joel, and we know how big he is.

Anat will get there. But first, she will keep wooing audiences here in Israel and retaining a certain ability to mesmerize a crowd like we rarely see. Tziki Laor plays also and provides terrific back-up vocals.

* Shay and Anat's success may also be attributed to their wondrous and dedicated manager-booker Andy Rosetti. I don't honestly know if I have ever seen a person, let alone a 22 year old former student, who fluently speaks more languages than I do (believe that one) work as hard as Andrea. She will not only do wonderful things in this industry, but her outlook on life is fresh, from the heart and exciting. She is exactly what this Country needs in our young adults.

* Happy 8th Birthday to CHEERS on Allenby Street in Tel Aviv. These guys know how or throw a party! Thanks!!!

* Remember Off the Wall Comedy in Jerusalem? Word is that this is THE place to be on Purim (Tuesday night). They are located in the basement at 34 Ben Yehuda Street. Be there, or be.. Hmm... not there?
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I have just returned from my visit with the amazing folks at the Sderot Media Center. In case you haven't grabbed onto the idea yet, these are the people responsible for getting all of us the CORRECT and ACCURATE news relative to the goings-on in the South of Israel. All the while being under almost constant attack of Qassam Missiles and rockets from the Gaza Strip. These folks do one terrific job, working out of a sort of renovated house on HaHistradut Street.

Children play in parks which are equipped with bomb shelters, and some of these kids appear outwardly to be unaffected, but we know differently.

We found these kids playing in the park. This park sports, for safety and security reasons, a "Snake Maze" that is completely enclosed. Just for safety. A new indoor playground was just built for the children of Sderot, and it will be dedicated and open next week.

More on terror and victims of terror later.

From Tel Aviv-Yafo, on the beautiful Mediterranean Sea, I bid you...
Ahavah u'Vrachot...Love and Blessings...

--Alan